I want background music in my life...
I want to find somebody who is exactly like me.
To see if what I do and the decisions I make are fair.
But I must assume they are.
And they make life the easiest for others.
Who would have thought that Id end up to be so delicate and vulnerable.
Susceptible to so many damages to my mind, body, and soul.
Afraid of being alone.
Though I overcome that fear time and time again.
Entertaining myself with songs in an empty room.
A slight echo surrounds me when I sing.
And it calms me.
Nurses and doctors outside must think I am going insane.
My feet dangle on the side of the bed.
I kick them back and forth and the sheet of paper beneath me russels.
Then I start thinking that it would be perfect if I could get every noise Im making in that room to start playing simultaneously.
Like in the cartoons.
Where one forest animal hits a hollow tree
Then another critter steps on branches making a crackin sound.
Then before you know it you got this amazing beat.
And the main character jumps in with sponteanous lyrics.
And sings about something highly inspiring and motivational.
Silly thoughts to keep my mind busy.
Stuff.
Questions.
Ok.
I drive back.
Wanting to stop for Chai but rememebered it is now my enemy.
I hold grudges against material things not people.
Its better.
I am no magician.
But I will pull the greatest dissapearing act.
This I do alone.
And I vanish.
To see if what I do and the decisions I make are fair.
But I must assume they are.
And they make life the easiest for others.
Who would have thought that Id end up to be so delicate and vulnerable.
Susceptible to so many damages to my mind, body, and soul.
Afraid of being alone.
Though I overcome that fear time and time again.
Entertaining myself with songs in an empty room.
A slight echo surrounds me when I sing.
And it calms me.
Nurses and doctors outside must think I am going insane.
My feet dangle on the side of the bed.
I kick them back and forth and the sheet of paper beneath me russels.
Then I start thinking that it would be perfect if I could get every noise Im making in that room to start playing simultaneously.
Like in the cartoons.
Where one forest animal hits a hollow tree
Then another critter steps on branches making a crackin sound.
Then before you know it you got this amazing beat.
And the main character jumps in with sponteanous lyrics.
And sings about something highly inspiring and motivational.
Silly thoughts to keep my mind busy.
Stuff.
Questions.
Ok.
I drive back.
Wanting to stop for Chai but rememebered it is now my enemy.
I hold grudges against material things not people.
Its better.
I am no magician.
But I will pull the greatest dissapearing act.
This I do alone.
And I vanish.