The J/I Ship is for Porn...
So, yubsie wrote me a song about all the badfic in the poor J/I ship. As over 90% of the fic contains porn, and over 90% of that porn is bad. (I accidentally re-read "Handel-ing It" today, and I'd forgotten how bad it was) :P
Tess: The J/I ship is really, really great
Fandom: FOR PORN
Tess: I think the fics are really worth the wait
Fandom: FOR PORN
Tess: There's always some new plotbunny
Fandom: FOR PORN
Tess: I read all day and night
Fandom: GOOD PORN
Tess: The ship just seems so completely right
Fandom: FOR PORN
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: FANDOM!
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: What are you doing?
Fandom: Why you think that Syd was born? Porn porn porn
Tess: Fan-dom!
Fandom: Oh, hello Tess Monster
Tess: You are RUINING my ship!
Fandom: Oh we sorry, we no mean to
Tess: Well would you mind being quiet for a minute so I can finish?
Fandom: Okay, don't like don't read?
Tess: GAH
Tess: I'm glad we have this new backstory scene
Fandom: For porn!
Tess: Which gives us untold plot bunnies
Fandom: For por- oops!
Tess: Right on the fanfic site
Fandom: For--
Tess: You can start out on the top
Tess: Until you've read enough and you're ready to stop
Fandom: FOR PORN!
Tess: Fandom!
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: Noooooo
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: Fandom!
Fandom: Then Irina's bodice was torn. Porn, porn, porn.
Tess: That's squicky! You're a badfic!
Fandom: Don't be a meenie flamer, Tess Monster
Tess: No, really, you're a badfic
Tess: Normal people don't have sex when they're supposed to be on a mission!
Fandom: Ooooooh?
Tess: What?!
Fandom: You have no idea. Ready fangirl hoardes?
Fangirl Hoardes: Ready!
Fandom: Let me hear it!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Fangirl: Told you, Tess
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Fangirl: I love the mess
Fandom: All these chicks love to clicks for porn, porn, porn
Tess: The J/I ship is not for porn!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: PORN PORN P--
Tess: Now hold on a second!
Tess: Now, I know for a fact that in one episode they shot at each other
Fangirl: That is correct
Tess: And in another, they had a heated argument
Fangirl: Sure
Tess: And in that other one, they discussed Nadia
Fangirl: Yes they did!
Tess: And then there was the time Irina hired that hitman!
Fangirl: True!
Fandom: Oh, but Tess
Fandom: What you think they do AFTER?
Tess: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: Gross!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: I hate badfic!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: It's the one we pick to double-click
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: for porn, porn, porn!
Tess: I hate my fandom!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: For porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn!
Tess: I give up!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: Porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn
Tess: I hate my fandom!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: porn, porn, porn, porn
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: J/I ship is for
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Fandom: YEAH!
Also, two memes I did five hundred years ago:
from sunshine_queen
Go to your iTunes/media player/WinAmp and put it all on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and after each one press play. Use the song title as the answer to the question.
What do you think of me?
Head Over Feet - Alanis Morisette
Will I have a happy life?
She's Hearing Voices - Bloc Party
What do my friends really think of me?
Like a Duck - MC Honky
Do people secretly lust after me?
Dream Dancing - Cole Porter
How can I make myself happy?
Stairway to Heaven - Richard Cheese Version, hmm.
What should I do with my life?
Fiction - Yuki Kajiura
Why must life be so full of pain?
Dead - They Might Be Giants
What does my significant other think of me?
Happy Endings - Pulp
Will I ever have children?
I Love You 'Cause I Have To - Dogs Die in Hot Cars
How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Winter - Tori Amos
Will I die happy?
Afraid of the Light - Terence Chua
Can you give me some advice?
Psychic Voicemail Hotline - Tom Smith
What do you think happiness is?
Not a Virgin - Poe
What's my favourite fetish?
Pink Tux to the Prom - Relient K
and
Katharine Hepburn
You scored 14% grit, 47% wit, 47% flair, and 4% class!
You are the fabulously quirky and independent woman of character. You go your own way, follow your own drummer, take your own lead. You stand
head and shoulders next to your partner, but you are perfectly willing and able to stand alone. Others might be more classically beautiful or conventionally woman-like, but you possess a more fundamental common sense and off-kilter charm, making interesting men fall at your feet. You can pick them up or leave them there as you see fit. You share the
screen with the likes of Spencer Tracy and Cary Grant, thinking men who like strong women.
Find out what kind of classic leading man you'd make by taking the
Classic Leading Man Test.
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
You scored higher than 19% on grit
You scored higher than 92% on wit
You scored higher than 80% on flair
You scored higher than 0% on class
Link: The Classic Dames Test written by gidgetgoes on OkCupid Free Online Dating
Tess: The J/I ship is really, really great
Fandom: FOR PORN
Tess: I think the fics are really worth the wait
Fandom: FOR PORN
Tess: There's always some new plotbunny
Fandom: FOR PORN
Tess: I read all day and night
Fandom: GOOD PORN
Tess: The ship just seems so completely right
Fandom: FOR PORN
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: FANDOM!
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: What are you doing?
Fandom: Why you think that Syd was born? Porn porn porn
Tess: Fan-dom!
Fandom: Oh, hello Tess Monster
Tess: You are RUINING my ship!
Fandom: Oh we sorry, we no mean to
Tess: Well would you mind being quiet for a minute so I can finish?
Fandom: Okay, don't like don't read?
Tess: GAH
Tess: I'm glad we have this new backstory scene
Fandom: For porn!
Tess: Which gives us untold plot bunnies
Fandom: For por- oops!
Tess: Right on the fanfic site
Fandom: For--
Tess: You can start out on the top
Tess: Until you've read enough and you're ready to stop
Fandom: FOR PORN!
Tess: Fandom!
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: Noooooo
Fandom: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: Fandom!
Fandom: Then Irina's bodice was torn. Porn, porn, porn.
Tess: That's squicky! You're a badfic!
Fandom: Don't be a meenie flamer, Tess Monster
Tess: No, really, you're a badfic
Tess: Normal people don't have sex when they're supposed to be on a mission!
Fandom: Ooooooh?
Tess: What?!
Fandom: You have no idea. Ready fangirl hoardes?
Fangirl Hoardes: Ready!
Fandom: Let me hear it!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Fangirl: Told you, Tess
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Fangirl: I love the mess
Fandom: All these chicks love to clicks for porn, porn, porn
Tess: The J/I ship is not for porn!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: PORN PORN P--
Tess: Now hold on a second!
Tess: Now, I know for a fact that in one episode they shot at each other
Fangirl: That is correct
Tess: And in another, they had a heated argument
Fangirl: Sure
Tess: And in that other one, they discussed Nadia
Fangirl: Yes they did!
Tess: And then there was the time Irina hired that hitman!
Fangirl: True!
Fandom: Oh, but Tess
Fandom: What you think they do AFTER?
Tess: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: Gross!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Tess: I hate badfic!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: It's the one we pick to double-click
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: for porn, porn, porn!
Tess: I hate my fandom!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: For porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn!
Tess: I give up!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: Porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn, porn
Tess: I hate my fandom!
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: porn, porn, porn, porn
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: J/I ship is for
Fandom and Fangirl Hoardes: The J/I ship is for porn!
Fandom: YEAH!
Also, two memes I did five hundred years ago:
from sunshine_queen
Go to your iTunes/media player/WinAmp and put it all on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and after each one press play. Use the song title as the answer to the question.
What do you think of me?
Head Over Feet - Alanis Morisette
Will I have a happy life?
She's Hearing Voices - Bloc Party
What do my friends really think of me?
Like a Duck - MC Honky
Do people secretly lust after me?
Dream Dancing - Cole Porter
How can I make myself happy?
Stairway to Heaven - Richard Cheese Version, hmm.
What should I do with my life?
Fiction - Yuki Kajiura
Why must life be so full of pain?
Dead - They Might Be Giants
What does my significant other think of me?
Happy Endings - Pulp
Will I ever have children?
I Love You 'Cause I Have To - Dogs Die in Hot Cars
How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Winter - Tori Amos
Will I die happy?
Afraid of the Light - Terence Chua
Can you give me some advice?
Psychic Voicemail Hotline - Tom Smith
What do you think happiness is?
Not a Virgin - Poe
What's my favourite fetish?
Pink Tux to the Prom - Relient K
and
Katharine Hepburn
You scored 14% grit, 47% wit, 47% flair, and 4% class!
You are the fabulously quirky and independent woman of character. You go your own way, follow your own drummer, take your own lead. You stand
head and shoulders next to your partner, but you are perfectly willing and able to stand alone. Others might be more classically beautiful or conventionally woman-like, but you possess a more fundamental common sense and off-kilter charm, making interesting men fall at your feet. You can pick them up or leave them there as you see fit. You share the
screen with the likes of Spencer Tracy and Cary Grant, thinking men who like strong women.
Find out what kind of classic leading man you'd make by taking the
Classic Leading Man Test.
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
You scored higher than 19% on grit
You scored higher than 92% on wit
You scored higher than 80% on flair
You scored higher than 0% on class
Link: The Classic Dames Test written by gidgetgoes on OkCupid Free Online Dating