Can I catch a break pls
This morning I went to a Baptist gospel church with Ellen and Alex and it was seriously one of the most fun and hilarious things I've done in a while.
It's really comforting to have people touch me right now, to rub my shoulders and my hands, and scratch my scalp. I can get slightly (very) apprehensive because I'm 99% positive that if something were to happen it would be the worst idea ever. I just want someone to hold me and let me cry when I need to and tell me I'm better than this. Is it common for boys to have thoughts like, "please do not try to kiss me right now" ? Though I have been angry the past few days, I'm kind of incapable of holding a grudge and have degraded back wishing somehow we could just get along because I really do not want to engage in an exchange of vindictive behavior. I love, and honestly I wish none of this was happening. It is however, and decisions have to be made to put myself in the best possible situation.
I'm pretty certain I'm going to be getting the fuck out of dodge. Also, this journal is over.
It's really comforting to have people touch me right now, to rub my shoulders and my hands, and scratch my scalp. I can get slightly (very) apprehensive because I'm 99% positive that if something were to happen it would be the worst idea ever. I just want someone to hold me and let me cry when I need to and tell me I'm better than this. Is it common for boys to have thoughts like, "please do not try to kiss me right now" ? Though I have been angry the past few days, I'm kind of incapable of holding a grudge and have degraded back wishing somehow we could just get along because I really do not want to engage in an exchange of vindictive behavior. I love, and honestly I wish none of this was happening. It is however, and decisions have to be made to put myself in the best possible situation.
I'm pretty certain I'm going to be getting the fuck out of dodge. Also, this journal is over.