Monthly Miscellanea: April

[noelct]

Everything I've read, watched, and contributed to in the last month.

[Note: This is too massive. Going back to weekly format.]

Stuff I've Done

At I Hate/Love Remakes:

• Episode 16, Part 1: One Missed Call (2003)
• Episode 17: True Grit

At Made of Fail:

• Episode 53: "What is this, a joke?" (segment contributor)

At Star Trek: Galilea:

• Episode 4: "Crystal Clear" (co-writer)

At Straight Guy Reviews of Bad Romance Novels:

• Fifty Shades of Grey, chapters 1 and 2

At The Super Saturday Short-Lived Showcase:

• Inhumanoids, episode 3: "The Evil That Lies Within, Part 3"
• Inhumanoids, episode 4: "The Evil That Lies Within, Part 4"
• Inhumanoids, episode 5: "The Evil That Lies Within, Part 5"
• Inhumanoids, episode 6: "Cypheroid"

Stuff I've Read/Watched

Scripts:

• The Commune (undated draft of the 2009 film) Recommended. Very entertaining read, though the horror elements are a bit sparse and jarring, and it works much better when it's a tongue-in-cheek angry teen culture clash satire.
• Dune (8-27-1982 draft of the 1984 film) Recommended. This is the last of the three drafts I own and, minus a few bits, is pretty much the finished film. Lynch never managed to keep his adaptation from feeling choppy and forced, but he still nails many of the book's key elements. The vision sequences especially make for an occasionally mesmerizing read.
• Ghost Rider 2: Riders on the Storm (unproduced 2009 treatment) Not Recommended. The pitch by Todd Farmer and Patrick Lussier (they of Drive Angry and My Bloody Valentine 3D fame) from the brief moment they were being considered for the project. You've got Nic Cage trying to settle down, an alcoholic priest with a shotgun who goes from hero to villain, some villain named Zodiac who has a cult of rune emblazoned warriors. There are interesting bits, like a cabal of religious leaders who secretly meet to combat satanic threats or the linneage of The Riders, but even they're ill used, the Rider is conveniently weakened to create tension, there's a bullshit romance, and everything is stilted and clunky and nowhere near as fun as it feels it should be. I haven't seen the "sequel" they ultimately went with, but I'm glad they didn't go with this one. For those interested, you can find a link to the draft at Todd Farmer's blog.
• Green Lantern (unproduced 6-20-2006 draft) Recommended. This is the version by SNL writer Robert Smigel, penned when Warner Brothers was seriously contemplating adapting this franchise into a comedy starring Jack Black. Yes, that seriously almost happened. And it does have issues: annoying lead (it's neither Hal or Kyle, but an original character named Judd), flat romance, tonally out of place gross-out humor (the hero punches a villain with projectile vomit), Legion is completely shoe-horned in, the climax is beyond stupid, and it takes half the script before we get to Oa and meet the other lanters... Buuuuuut, it's actually not all that bad. Judd going from a loser to a genuine hero, with the assistance of his comic geek best friend, is quite charming at times. The Lanterns and the Guardians are played straight and handled faithfully and respectfully. There's a hilarious bit where a drunk Killowog starts snacking on a couch. And, shock of all shocks, Sinestro is handled beautifully, with his great "hero who's really a closet control freak dictator" Emerald Dawn arc fully intact. This script needs a lot of work, but it's a solid foundation with some genuinely great stretches, and I'd love to see what it could have turned into after a few more drafts.
• The Matrix (3-29-1998 draft of the 1999 film) Recommended. I'm sorry, but this will never stop being a great script. Smooth writing that breathes you through this world. Clever twins on the classic "hero's journey" plot and Campbellian archetypes. And it's just so damn cool, even after all these years.
• Megamind (undated draft of the 2010 film) Recommended. Haven't seen the film yet, but I'm presuming this is a very early draft, because not only did some plot elements not line up with what I saw in the trailers (lead's origin and henchmen completely different, titled Mastermind), but it's not a script for a kids movie, with swearing and raunchy sex jokes aplenty. I'm not even sure this draft was intended for animation. All that aside, it was a blast of a read. The plot was a little uneven at times, but it was wildly fun, funny, clever, surprising, and anchored by a solid chunk of genuine heart.
• Moon (11-11-2007 draft of the 2009 film) Recommended. Mesmerizing and clever, but once the big twist came at the midpoint, every element of the second half fell into place a little predictably. Not bad, not at all, it just peaked early.
• 9 (undated draft of the 2009 film) Recommended. Dry and a little formulaic, but sincere and full of inventive little touches.
• Sabrina Fair (1953 play script) Recommended.
• Sabrina (12-7-1953 draft of the 1954 film) Recommended.
• Sabrina (3-22-1994 draft of the 1995 film) Recommended.
• Star Wars, Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back (1-16-1979 draft of the 1980 film) Recommended. At 170 pages, this draft gets a little bloated and bogged down on technical details during the action sequences (Lawrence, whether the stars go left or right or right or left shouldn't be in the script for half the shots - let the technical crew work that out as needed), but the classic story and characters totally hold strong on the page. This is close to the final draft, but it's interesting seeing differences like the Wampa opening, additional training from Yoda, the original version of the "I love you." "I know." exchange, and Vader's revelation being blanked out with a "See section so-and-so for additional dialogue", proving that they really were keeping it secret from the crew.

Comics:

• The Bionic Man #7 "Body and Soul" (2012) Recommended.
• Birds of Prey #1 "Long Time Gone" (1999) Recommended.
• Black Summer #0 (2007) Recommended.
• Black Summer #1 (2007) Recommended.
• Black Summer #2 (2007) Recommended.
• Black Summer #3 (2007) Recommended.
• Black Summer #4 (2007) Recommended.
• Black Summer #5 (2007) Recommended.
• Black Summer #6 (2007) Recommended.
• Black Summer #7 (2007) Recommended. Fascinating series, but never fully finds its footing after the amazing setup. Instead of really getting into the broader world themes it suggests, it's instead little more than interesting fucked up people violently fucking up one another and anyone immediately surrounding them. Don't get me wrong, a lot of it makes sense, I like the compressed, almost real time timeline, and some of the twists, but it doesn't ever really go anywhere once they get through the setup. Ultimately underwhelming, yet still worth a read if you're an Ellis fan. Stunning ultra-detailed art, too.
• Blue Beetle eighth series #1 "Blue Monday" (2006) Recommended.
• The Boys #26 "We Gotta Go Now, Part 4" (2008) Recommended.
• Detective Comics #857 "Batwoman: Elegy, Part 4" (2009) Recommended. A bit of a ho-hum by-the-numbers conclusion to the arc, but still entertaining and beautifully drawn.
• Detective Comics #858 "Batwoman: Go, Part 1" (2009) Recommended. Heartbreaking, and I'm curious to see if they actually follow through on the revelation they're setting up, as that will break my heart even more. And I love LOVE Williams doing an impersonation of the Batman: Year One art while still slipping in his signature stuff.
• Dungeons & Dragons IDW series #0 "Fell's Four Five" (2010) Recommended. For my money, John Rogers truly can do no wrong.
• Fables #3 "Fables in Exile, Part 3: Blood Tells" (2002) Recommended.
• The Fury of Firestorm, the Nuclear Men #6 "An Aftermath of Rage" (2012) Recommended.
• Hack/Slash: Land of Lost Toys #2 (2005) Recommended.
• Hellraiser Boom series #9 "Heaven's Reply, Part 1" (2012) Recommended. I continue to be fascinated by the unexpected places this continuation of the franchise is going.
• Hybrid #3 (2009) Recommended.
• The Infinite #1 (2011) Recommended. Yeah, yeah, Liefeld is a shitty artist, and it's hysterical having a character say "He looks just like me!" when every other man in the book also has the exact same face, but Kirkman's setup is solid and fun, and the dialogue gives it the character and heart that the art is incapable of conveying.
• The Infinite #2 (2011) Recommended.
• The Infinite #3 (2011) Recommended.
• Marvel Knights: 4 #18 "Divine Time, Part 4" (2005) Recommended.
• Night and Fog #3 (2008) Recommended.
• Prime #1 "Prime Time" (1993) Recommended. Hysterical. One of the best first issues of a comic I've read in long time, as a person suddenly granted super powers does everything right in exactly the wrong way.
• Wonder Woman fourth series #6 "Thrones" (2012) Recommended. Though Tom Atkins' art is a bit clunky.

Episodes:

• Accel World #1 "Acceleration" (2012) Recommended. Not entirely sure what I just watched, but I sure as hell enjoyed it. Fascinating, uniquely realized concept. Wild, above-average execution. Definitely worth checking out.
• Avatar: The Last Airbender #3 "The Southern Air Temple" (2005) Recommended.
• Beast King GoLion #1 "Escape from Slave Castle" (1981) Recommended. Wow, I knew this series was edited when it was Americanized as Voltron, but I don't think any part of this first episode survived the cut. Shockingly dark, brutal, and ballsy. Not saying it's particularly good, mind you, but it was better than expected and surprisingly gripping.
• Bodacious Space Pirates #3 "The Odette II Leaves Port" (2012) Recommended.
• Castle #74 "Linchpin" (2012) Recommended. In all honesty, this espionage packed two-parter has been heaps more entertaining than the last two Bourne movies combined.
• Castle #75 "Once Upon a Crime" (2012) Recommended.
• Castle #76 "A Dance with Death" (2012) Recommended. One of the most ludicrous plots I've seen in a while. But in a good way.
• Castle #77 "47 Seconds" (2012) Recommended.
• Castle #78 "The Limey" (2012) Recommended.
• Community #61 "Contemporary Impressionists" (2012) Recommended.
• Community #62 "Digital Exploration of Interior Design" (2012) Recommended.
• Community #63 "Pillows and Blankets" (2012) Recommended. Hands down the single most briliant half hour of television I've seen in the last year.
• Community #64 "Origins of Vampire Mythology" (2012) Recommended
• Community #65 "Virtual Systems Analysis" (2012) Recommended.
• Community #66 "Basic Lupine Urology" (2012) Recommended. Hands down yet another the single most brilliant half hours of television I've seen all year.
• Game of Thrones #11 "The North Remembers" (2012) Recommended. Every episode needs a Joffrey slap.
• Game of Thrones #12 "The Night Lands" (2012) Recommended.
• Game of Thrones #13 "What is Dead May never Lie" (2012) Recommended.
• Game of Thrones #14 "Garden of Bones" (2012) Recommended. Holy fuck, Joffrey. Seriously, holy fuck.
• Kong: The Animated Series #1 "The Return, Part 1" (2011) Recommended. Yeah, the setup is still complete nonsense, but I like the crisp writing. I dug this show when I caught it on Jettix back in the day, and I'm glad to see it still holds up.
• The Last Scandal of My Life #12 (2008) Recommended.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #28 "Island of Illusion, Part 1" (1993) Recommended. There's times where this show is nonsensically crazy in an awful, nigh unwatcheable way. And then there's times where it's nonsensically crazy in a way that's awesome and wildly entertaining. This is the later. "Feel the power of LOKAR!!!"
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #29 "Island of Illusion, Part 2" (1993) Recommended. Though it does drag when it comes time for the individual clip-show can-do confidence building sessions.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #30 "The Rockstar" (1993) Not Recommended. ALL THE PAIN TO WHOEVER DID THAT KID'S HIDEOUS DUB VOICE GAH!
• Mighty Morhpin' Power Rangers #31 "Calamity Kimbery" (1993) Recommended. The episode that made me fall in love with Kimberly lo those many years ago.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #32 "A Star is Born" (1993) Recommended. Except for the random Babe Ruthless. Seriously what the fuck was up with that guy?
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #33 "The Yolk's on You" (1993) Recommended. I think this is the first time they've actually developed the Monster of the Week as a character, to the point where I started to sympathize with him when those teenagers started beating him with their attitude.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #34 "The Green Candle, Part 1" (1993) Recommended. I remember being on the edge of my seat for the resolution of this one as a kid.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #35 "The Green Candle, Part 2" (1993) Recommended. Clumsy, but a pivotal episode for both Green Ranger lore and Tommy/Kimberly shippers.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #36 "Birds of a Feather" (1993) Not Recommended. Except for the brief moment of awesome that is Jason kicking ass in his first outing with the Dragon powers, this is disposable filler.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #37 "Clean-Up Club" (1993) Recommended. Their very special anti-pollution episode is awful, but in a hilarious way that borders on absurd brilliance. Also, Ms. Appleby is awesome.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #38 "A Bad Reflection on You" (1993) Recommended. Hilarious. Intentionally, which is always an important distinction to make with this series. Honestly, though, one of the more kooky and clever episodes.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #39 "Doomsday, Part 1" (1993) Recommended. Surprisingly epic setup. Great model work. Lothar! Love that Golda gets a zord, though technically, does he need a zord since he's repeatedly been able to become a giant?
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #40 "Doomsday, Part 2" (1993) Recommended. Every bit as epic a payoff as the setup suggested, especially with the zords getting the shit kicked out of them. Love the ending, too, which is a great moment to hang on going into the mid-season hiatus.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #41 "Rita's Seed of Evil" (1994) Recommended.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #42 "A Pig Surprise" (1994) Recommended.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #43 "Something Fishy" (1994) Recommended. I have to give this season a lot of credit in that, even when it's an empty filler story (aka most of the series), they still make things fun and engaging. And this episode totally made me a Billy/Kimberly shipper.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #44 "Lions and Blizzards" (1994) Recommended.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #45 "Crystal of Nightmares" (1994) Recommended. Clever way to re-use old footage without slipping into being a standard clip show.
• Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers #46 "To Flea or Not to Flee" (1994) Recommended. But only for Bulk & Skull. And for Kim/Jason 'shippers.
• Mortal Kombat: Defenders of the Realm #1 "Kombat Begins Again" (1996) Not Recommended. One of the absolute worst first episodes of an action cartoon I've seen in a long time. Actually tried to make "It's Kombat time!" happen as a catchphrase. Hysterically bad.
• New Girl #19 "Secrets" (2012) Recommended.
• New Girl #20 "Normal" (2012) Recommended.
• New Girl #21 "Kids" (2012) Recommended. If Annalise Basso doesn't get her own tween cable sitcom out of this hysterical guest perfomance, a great oversight shall have been committed.
• New Girl #22 "Tomatoes" (2012) Recommended. And with the breaking of a penis, much laughter was had.
• Once Upon a Time #18 "The Stable Boy" (2012) Recommended. Huge origin revelations! Things actually starting to happen! Possibly!
• Once Upon a Time #19 (2012) Recommended. But to quote Monty Python: "GET ON WITH IT."
• Psych #93 "Autopsy Turvy" (2012) Recommended. Guest directed by David Lynch's daughter Jennifer and doesn't disappoint in being one of the oddest episodes this show has ever done.
• Psych #94 "Santabarbaratown" (2012) Recommended. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! But in a good way.
• Roswell Conspiracies #1 "The Bait, Part 1" (1999) Recommended. Why the hell didn't I watch this back in the day? It's exactly my type of show! Clunky but sleek 90s designs and animation. Sharp writing (Bob Forward!). Heaps of attitude. I think I'm in love.
• Sherlock #1 "A Study in Pink" (2010) Recommended. Very nice, but felt overly drawn out at times. Like a 60 minute episode padded out to 88. Not in terms of extra scenes, but in the way many of the scenes dragged on longer than they needed to. But it's a small quibble.
• Sherlock #2 "The Blind Baker" (2010) Recommended.
• Sherlock #3 "The Great Game" (2010) Recommended. Love how they managed to breeze through half a dozen mysteries in a single episode, but that what they're going with for Moriarty? Seriously? Wow.
• Zixx #2 "In for a Penny" (2004) Recommended.

Film:

• All That Jazz (1979) Recommended. Mesmerizing. My fourth film of Bob Fosse, and the third of his I'll add to the list of greatest film's I've ever seen. I can't think of a more shockingly personal film.
• Bridesmaids (2011) Recommended.
• The Hunger Games (2012) Recommended. Marvelous. The way every frame perfectly captures the emotion of the moment, the world-building, the acting, the music, so much to love about this movie. Shame about that shaky-cam, though.
• Solarbabies (1986) Recommended. It's nutty, but a good kind of nutty.