TO SEE YOU WHEN I WAKE UP
The year of 2003.
So much happened and yet so much didn't happen. There's a longing to let go of all the evil doings in the year 2003 but how do you let go when you know that a part of you will always grip tightly to the things that happened even if you don't want to.
Happy new year to me.
A night spent at home, by choice, because there's too much going on to act carefree and smile and jump for joy as the clock changes from 11:59 to 12:00. And its what I need. Its a chance to collect myself and make sure I am okay. There are still ten toes and ten fingers, though one is still swollen from a bee sting. My lungs still breathe in and out, deeply and shallowly. Everything is still in working order, even my heart which beats in pieces that have shattered on the floor.
Lucky bamboo sits on my dresser. A gift from my mother whose decided I need some luck in my life. Luck or a new life; either will work.
So here's to 2004 and the luck it will hopefully bring. I made it through 2003; I will make it through 2004.