Douchey Moments in History
Welcome to another edition of Douchey Moments in History!
Before we get started, we just want to say thank you so much for the Christmas stocking, murgy31! We love it!
Now, on to the douchefest!
"You're kind of being Mr. Attitude about the whole thing."
So, the fact that Luke is on his way to a meeting at Grimaldi Shipping, and therefore can't stay and have beer for breakfast with Noah and his film buddies, equals Luke being "Mr. Attitude" in Noah world? I just... I don't even... there's no other way I could possibly respond to that besides... DOUCHE, DOUCHE, DOUCHE!!!!!
"Get off of him! What are you doing?"
Imagine a situation where you walk into a coffee shop and see the man you [allegedly] love and a professor who has been making inappropriate passes at you nearly coming to blows. In what universe would you immediately jump into the fray to defend the sleazy professor and to assume the man you [claim to] love was to blame? I'll tell you what universe -- DOUCHE Universe.
"Why did you give the dean the exact ammunition he needed to kick me out of school shut down my film?"
Noah's douchiness in this clip knows no bounds. First, he just plain ignores Luke's existence, then he accuses Luke of lying (because, God knows, actually giving the man you claim to love the benefit of the doubt rather than automatically assuming he'd done something wrong would just be far too much to ask!). Next, his comment about the dean shutting down his film... WTF? Can Noah really be that self involved that he thinks the dean actually gives a flying fuck whether or not his film gets made (rhetorical question -- of COURSE Noah can be that self involved!). Why should the dean have any desire to shut down Noah's film?
And I love the fact that Noah can say this without the slightest hint of remorse over a time he himself went to the dean and got Luke EXPELLED FROM SCHOOL. Even if Luke had gone to the dean, which is worse? Having to start a stupid student film from scratch, or getting kicked out of school? Well, DUH! This is Noah world, after all, so clearly whichever of those two things had happened to Noah is worse!
And again with the self involved bullshit where Noah clearly thinks Luke only did it because he was jealous and thought Mason was going to steal Noah away or some such crap. What bullshit! Luke did it because he was concerned about a professor acting inappropriately towards a student, and yes, the fact that that student was his boyfriend made it a lot more personal, but at no point did Luke ever give the slightest indication that he thought Noah had feelings for Mason. He wasn't happy about Mason trying to drive a wedge between them, but that would have been irrelevant if Mason hadn't been Noah's professor.
In addition to that... gee, Noah, don't you think maybe Luke could possibly be upset with Mason's behavior ON YOUR BEHALF? I mean, it's not like Luke has ever had an experience where he had to deal with an older man in a position of authority making unwanted passes at him or anything... OH, WAIT!!! The fact that Luke is upset with Mason making passes at you couldn't possibly be because he knows how uncomfortable it is to be in that situation, and he's unhappy to think that you might be feeling the same way he did when Brian was making passes at him, could it? Douche.
And just to make careful note of it here... yes, Luke was being pretty persistent about wanting to talk to Noah even after Noah said he didn't have time, and even after Noah was up at the top of the ladder. But then Noah once again told Luke he didn't have time to talk because he had to get the fireworks set up, Luke said "Okay, I'm sorry" and walked away. Another ten seconds passed of Luke NOT distracting Noah at all before Noah commented that something wasn't right with the fireworks, then another ten seconds before it all blew up in Noah's face. The way Noah acted for the next six months, you would think Luke had been standing in front of him, shouting, waving crap in his face, and shaking the ladder. Luke wasn't in any way responsible for the accident... One and only one person was responsible for that accident, and that person was Noah. Douche.
(On a side note, watching this clip again, the only way it makes sense that Reid could do anything for Noah's vision is if the blindness was caused not by the explosion, but by falling off the ladder and landing on his exceptionally thick skull.)
"Why couldn't you just leave it alone?"
I find it very interesting that, before he realizes he's blind, Noah is actually kind of pleasant. He doesn't appear to be at all angry at Luke or to blame him for the accident... hell, he takes responsibility for it himself when he says that he shouldn't have been setting off explosives when he was having a fight with his boyfriend. Then he finds out he can't see, and his initial reaction of fear and anger I can really understand. Then he shifts into feeling sorry for himself mode, which I can also totally understand. And it's only after that when he starts to blame Luke... it really convinces me that what he told Luke all those months later -- that he never actually blamed Luke, but that he wanted to punish Luke so that Luke would hurt as much as he did -- was the 100% truth. And he knew Luke well enough to know that Luke would accept the blame, that Luke was probably already blaming himself, because when DOESN'T Luke blame himself?
"I didn't have anything to do with what happened to you."
Okay, Noah, it's true enough that you didn't have anything to do with what happened to Luke. But Luke didn't have anything to do with what happened to you, either, and he had as many good reasons why he could have blamed you for his accident as you have to blame him for yours. But the reason why Luke is made of wonderful and you are an emotionally abusive piece of shit, is that Luke went out of his way to make sure you knew you weren't to blame.
Luke is 10000% percent right when he says that it doesn't matter whether or not Mason ever had a shot at breaking him and Noah apart, what matters is that what Mason was doing was WRONG. Noah's failure to understand and agree with that is just one of the millions upon millions of things that make him a total DOUCHE.
Also, towards the end of the clip we get a lovely view of Noah's sense of entitlement when it comes to Luke. Luke hands Noah the DVDs from his film and leaves the room. After some time passes, Noah calls out to Luke, and seems genuinely surprised to discover that Luke hadn't been sitting nearby, waiting patiently until Noah decided he wanted him. It didn't even occur to him that Luke might not be there, ready to come running the moment Noah called for him.
"You are the reason I lost my sight..."
As I said back when I posted the clips from Luke's paralysis, if Noah's bad attitude had just lasted a few episodes, I would have found it understandable and forgivable. But it just goes on and on and on, and he continues to blame Luke for his own bad judgment and stupidity, and I just don't even know what else to say about it. Noah is just a douche, down to every last molecule of his being.
And he continues with his moronic bullshit about how Luke got Mason fired out of jealousy, despite the fact that Luke had spoken to Damian because he was concerned about Mason's inappropriate behavior, not because of any kind of jealousy. Also, LUKE DIDN'T GET MASON FIRED, he didn't go to the dean and report on Mason, unlike someone else we know who actually did go to the dean and report on Luke... who was that again? Oh, right... it was NOAH! What a fucking douche.
"You can't do this for me, Luke!"
Lucinda sent her jet so that Noah could come home from the clinic for Christmas, and this was pretty much the last time I was willing to give him even a smidgen of benefit of the doubt. If he'd come home from that clinic and acted like an actual human being, I might have been able to picture a future where he and Luke could work things out. And when he first appears, it looks like it might be promising, as he's initially he's all smiles and niceness to the whole family... except for Luke. The moment Luke tries to hug him, he backs off in what appears to be revulsion, and you can feel the temperature in the room drop to somewhere around absolute zero. And when Luke asks him what it means that he's there, Noah mentions wanting to be at the Snyder farm for Christmas, that it feels like home to him, and he throws in wanting to spend Christmas with Luke almost as an afterthought. If it hadn't already been clear two years earlier, when the idea of living at the farm with a "built in family" was more exciting to him than the idea of living in the dorms with Luke, this clip would dispel any last shred of doubt I might have had about the fact that Noah never loved Luke at all. He was using Luke for the sense of being part of a family he got from being in a relationship with Luke.
"I'm trying to deal with what happened to ME; do we have to throw an US into every conversation and interaction that we have?"
This is the last clip I'm posting, and I don't even have the words any more. Noah is just such an emotionally abusive douche in every way imaginable, and Luke exhibits all the signs of battered person syndrome, with the way he responds to every word that comes out of Noah's mouth. The one and only good thing that came out of Luke's relationship with Noah is the fact that Luke may not have ever even heard of the name Dr. Reid Oliver if it wasn't for Noah, and if it wasn't for Noah's extremely douchey self-pity and his cruelty to Luke over his own damned stupidity, Luke certainly never would have blackmailed Reid to come to Oakdale and take care of Noah. So, in the end, we do have something to thank Noah for after all, because Luke never would have met Reid if Noah hadn't been such a total DOUCHE.
This ends "Douchey Moments in History: Noah Mayer Edition" -- I hope you've enjoyed the ride as much as I have.
Before we get started, we just want to say thank you so much for the Christmas stocking, murgy31! We love it!
Now, on to the douchefest!
"You're kind of being Mr. Attitude about the whole thing."
So, the fact that Luke is on his way to a meeting at Grimaldi Shipping, and therefore can't stay and have beer for breakfast with Noah and his film buddies, equals Luke being "Mr. Attitude" in Noah world? I just... I don't even... there's no other way I could possibly respond to that besides... DOUCHE, DOUCHE, DOUCHE!!!!!
Click to view"Get off of him! What are you doing?"
Imagine a situation where you walk into a coffee shop and see the man you [allegedly] love and a professor who has been making inappropriate passes at you nearly coming to blows. In what universe would you immediately jump into the fray to defend the sleazy professor and to assume the man you [claim to] love was to blame? I'll tell you what universe -- DOUCHE Universe.
"Why did you give the dean the exact ammunition he needed to kick me out of school shut down my film?"
Noah's douchiness in this clip knows no bounds. First, he just plain ignores Luke's existence, then he accuses Luke of lying (because, God knows, actually giving the man you claim to love the benefit of the doubt rather than automatically assuming he'd done something wrong would just be far too much to ask!). Next, his comment about the dean shutting down his film... WTF? Can Noah really be that self involved that he thinks the dean actually gives a flying fuck whether or not his film gets made (rhetorical question -- of COURSE Noah can be that self involved!). Why should the dean have any desire to shut down Noah's film?
And I love the fact that Noah can say this without the slightest hint of remorse over a time he himself went to the dean and got Luke EXPELLED FROM SCHOOL. Even if Luke had gone to the dean, which is worse? Having to start a stupid student film from scratch, or getting kicked out of school? Well, DUH! This is Noah world, after all, so clearly whichever of those two things had happened to Noah is worse!
And again with the self involved bullshit where Noah clearly thinks Luke only did it because he was jealous and thought Mason was going to steal Noah away or some such crap. What bullshit! Luke did it because he was concerned about a professor acting inappropriately towards a student, and yes, the fact that that student was his boyfriend made it a lot more personal, but at no point did Luke ever give the slightest indication that he thought Noah had feelings for Mason. He wasn't happy about Mason trying to drive a wedge between them, but that would have been irrelevant if Mason hadn't been Noah's professor.
In addition to that... gee, Noah, don't you think maybe Luke could possibly be upset with Mason's behavior ON YOUR BEHALF? I mean, it's not like Luke has ever had an experience where he had to deal with an older man in a position of authority making unwanted passes at him or anything... OH, WAIT!!! The fact that Luke is upset with Mason making passes at you couldn't possibly be because he knows how uncomfortable it is to be in that situation, and he's unhappy to think that you might be feeling the same way he did when Brian was making passes at him, could it? Douche.
And just to make careful note of it here... yes, Luke was being pretty persistent about wanting to talk to Noah even after Noah said he didn't have time, and even after Noah was up at the top of the ladder. But then Noah once again told Luke he didn't have time to talk because he had to get the fireworks set up, Luke said "Okay, I'm sorry" and walked away. Another ten seconds passed of Luke NOT distracting Noah at all before Noah commented that something wasn't right with the fireworks, then another ten seconds before it all blew up in Noah's face. The way Noah acted for the next six months, you would think Luke had been standing in front of him, shouting, waving crap in his face, and shaking the ladder. Luke wasn't in any way responsible for the accident... One and only one person was responsible for that accident, and that person was Noah. Douche.
(On a side note, watching this clip again, the only way it makes sense that Reid could do anything for Noah's vision is if the blindness was caused not by the explosion, but by falling off the ladder and landing on his exceptionally thick skull.)
"Why couldn't you just leave it alone?"
I find it very interesting that, before he realizes he's blind, Noah is actually kind of pleasant. He doesn't appear to be at all angry at Luke or to blame him for the accident... hell, he takes responsibility for it himself when he says that he shouldn't have been setting off explosives when he was having a fight with his boyfriend. Then he finds out he can't see, and his initial reaction of fear and anger I can really understand. Then he shifts into feeling sorry for himself mode, which I can also totally understand. And it's only after that when he starts to blame Luke... it really convinces me that what he told Luke all those months later -- that he never actually blamed Luke, but that he wanted to punish Luke so that Luke would hurt as much as he did -- was the 100% truth. And he knew Luke well enough to know that Luke would accept the blame, that Luke was probably already blaming himself, because when DOESN'T Luke blame himself?
"I didn't have anything to do with what happened to you."
Okay, Noah, it's true enough that you didn't have anything to do with what happened to Luke. But Luke didn't have anything to do with what happened to you, either, and he had as many good reasons why he could have blamed you for his accident as you have to blame him for yours. But the reason why Luke is made of wonderful and you are an emotionally abusive piece of shit, is that Luke went out of his way to make sure you knew you weren't to blame.
Luke is 10000% percent right when he says that it doesn't matter whether or not Mason ever had a shot at breaking him and Noah apart, what matters is that what Mason was doing was WRONG. Noah's failure to understand and agree with that is just one of the millions upon millions of things that make him a total DOUCHE.
Also, towards the end of the clip we get a lovely view of Noah's sense of entitlement when it comes to Luke. Luke hands Noah the DVDs from his film and leaves the room. After some time passes, Noah calls out to Luke, and seems genuinely surprised to discover that Luke hadn't been sitting nearby, waiting patiently until Noah decided he wanted him. It didn't even occur to him that Luke might not be there, ready to come running the moment Noah called for him.
"You are the reason I lost my sight..."
As I said back when I posted the clips from Luke's paralysis, if Noah's bad attitude had just lasted a few episodes, I would have found it understandable and forgivable. But it just goes on and on and on, and he continues to blame Luke for his own bad judgment and stupidity, and I just don't even know what else to say about it. Noah is just a douche, down to every last molecule of his being.
And he continues with his moronic bullshit about how Luke got Mason fired out of jealousy, despite the fact that Luke had spoken to Damian because he was concerned about Mason's inappropriate behavior, not because of any kind of jealousy. Also, LUKE DIDN'T GET MASON FIRED, he didn't go to the dean and report on Mason, unlike someone else we know who actually did go to the dean and report on Luke... who was that again? Oh, right... it was NOAH! What a fucking douche.
"You can't do this for me, Luke!"
Lucinda sent her jet so that Noah could come home from the clinic for Christmas, and this was pretty much the last time I was willing to give him even a smidgen of benefit of the doubt. If he'd come home from that clinic and acted like an actual human being, I might have been able to picture a future where he and Luke could work things out. And when he first appears, it looks like it might be promising, as he's initially he's all smiles and niceness to the whole family... except for Luke. The moment Luke tries to hug him, he backs off in what appears to be revulsion, and you can feel the temperature in the room drop to somewhere around absolute zero. And when Luke asks him what it means that he's there, Noah mentions wanting to be at the Snyder farm for Christmas, that it feels like home to him, and he throws in wanting to spend Christmas with Luke almost as an afterthought. If it hadn't already been clear two years earlier, when the idea of living at the farm with a "built in family" was more exciting to him than the idea of living in the dorms with Luke, this clip would dispel any last shred of doubt I might have had about the fact that Noah never loved Luke at all. He was using Luke for the sense of being part of a family he got from being in a relationship with Luke.
"I'm trying to deal with what happened to ME; do we have to throw an US into every conversation and interaction that we have?"
This is the last clip I'm posting, and I don't even have the words any more. Noah is just such an emotionally abusive douche in every way imaginable, and Luke exhibits all the signs of battered person syndrome, with the way he responds to every word that comes out of Noah's mouth. The one and only good thing that came out of Luke's relationship with Noah is the fact that Luke may not have ever even heard of the name Dr. Reid Oliver if it wasn't for Noah, and if it wasn't for Noah's extremely douchey self-pity and his cruelty to Luke over his own damned stupidity, Luke certainly never would have blackmailed Reid to come to Oakdale and take care of Noah. So, in the end, we do have something to thank Noah for after all, because Luke never would have met Reid if Noah hadn't been such a total DOUCHE.
This ends "Douchey Moments in History: Noah Mayer Edition" -- I hope you've enjoyed the ride as much as I have.