Sometimes I feel sort of homesick. Here, I'm out of place. Alien. Green.
On my home planet, we have lots of sex. We talk a lot about sex. Sometimes we talk about the next sex we're going to have while we're having sex. (It's really hot; you should try it.) But cultures of other species don't like sex as much. Or they do, but not in public places, and they don't like to talk about it. That makes all the things I want to say and do--which mostly involve sex--wrong. So I start thinking about home.
On my home planet, I was a slave. I promised myself I would never be owned again.
I think it's a false dichotomy, and I set it up myself. It feels like one place I can't be free, but at least I can be me. And the other place, I'm free, but I can't express myself.
But then I remember why I joined Starfleet, and it's because even if other species are more repressed about sex, they're still free, and freedom means you get to be yourself no matter what. It's hard to remember, but sometimes I get reminded.
The kink meme thing reminds me. I see all those women get to freely ask for things that turn them on, things they want to read, and things they want to masturbate to. I get to see them liberate themselves, not from chains or anything, but from other things, like shame and fear and embarrassment. I get to see them be already liberated, perfectly comfortable asking for things that will turn them on, or please them, or make them feel good.
And I just got reminded again, because a lady on the meme thing showed me
teamgaila. Of course it's all about me, and it strokes my ego. But it's not just that these girls care about me, it's that they care about someone like me. I didn't save Earth like Jimbo and Spock and N and Pavel and Hikaru and Bones and Monty and Chris and Old Spock. I'm someone who just wants to be free, and have lots and lots of carefree sex, and love people who are nice and sweet and have lots to give.
Like I told the meme lady, teamgaila reminded me we're all really the same. Like how we all get off on sex, we also all want to be free to love each other in our own ways, for our own reasons. We want to be free to love each other even if it means no sex at all. And when I think about it that way, I'm glad I'm not on Orion. I'm glad I'm part of Starfleet because one day I am going to captain a ship and go back there and kick serious ass, and save all my sisters and we will not be slaves ever again. So they can have sex with everyone they want to or no one they want to, however they want to do it. Maybe they will come back and request lots of stuff on the meme. So, like I told the meme lady:
Girls, I wish I could just lick every single one of your clitorises and then suck on them hard until you come right on my face! But I can't so I totally have a vibrator inside me right now.
When I think about Orion these days, I think this: Freedom is green.