Sporking of Chapter 3.1 full of Epicness
Title: The Feeling you get.
Author: Luna Valentine
Band(s)/pairing(s): the Gazette again. / some random sue
Rating on how bad it is: On a scale of 1-10, I'd give it a 8. Everyone's so OOC,, and the OC totally reeks of Mary-Sue qualities.The grammar’s pretty bad too.
Origin: AFF.net!
I say/Notes: Hmm. This story is centered around a girl that they apparently know, and treat like a sister. She's really close to Aoi, and well...in this fic, his characterization needs a lot to be desired. Previous chapters 1, 2
There is commotion outside of the doors as Ruki sits alone in the theatre. It seems as if management is still punishing him.
Ruki: So I’m supposed to do this thing all by myself?
No one appears.
Ruki: *grumbles to himself*
Aoi suddenly bursts through the doors, looking out of breath.
Aoi: Where is everybody?
Ruki: Not here…yet. What’s up with you?
Aoi; Management tried to tag me down, so I ran into the closest room I could find.
Ruki: And you ran in here?
Aoi: Wha-*Realizes he’s in the theatre* Shit!
There is even more commotion outside, and suddenly Saga, Tora, and Hiroto are pushed through the doors.
Hiroto: What is this place? It’s too dark.
Tora: Oh boy.
Aoi: What.
Ruki: Oh hell no. There’s no way I’m doing this with-
Saga: This is weird.
Hiroto, Saga, and Tora take seats
Hiroto: Hey! How did we end up in here with you guys?
Saga: Yeah. What are the odds of this happening?
Aoi: What the fuck? If you guys are here, where’s the rest of our band?
Ruki: Management lifted the probation off of them. Lucky bastards.
Aoi:…
Hiroto: Whoa. You guys were on probation?
Ruki: *Glares*
Hiroto: *Hides*
Ruki: Let’s get this over with.
Aoi: This is total and complete bullshit.
Chapter 3- The Live
Hiroto: I love lives!
Tora; Yeah. We know.
Ruki: God. Kill me now.
alright. a noter on this one. on the Filth In The Beauty live, forgive me if i described the way the song started wrong. I'm no musician in any way =P.
Saga: ‘noter’?
Ruki: The whole fic started wrong.
Aoi: Okay. She’s warning us about the part where she screwed up the description of our song. Thanks for the foreshadowing! /sarcasm. No. Really.
but hopefully it's decent. and i dont go to many lives at all, so maybe it's a bit poor, but i tried >.<
lol
enjoy!
oh yeah, we're getting somewhere with the story, finally ^_^
Ruki: Try harder.
Aoi: Where are we in this damn thing anyway?
Saga: Wow. The fic must be really bad if you’re this nitpicky about it.
Hiroto: Hey, maybe it won’t be that bad!
Ruki: You’ll regret those words. You’ll see when you read the first paragraph.
‘Done!’ Kai returned to the locker room backstage where they were all getting ready for the live. ‘Mr Technician-Man said he’ll fix things up so Rei could sing the female bits of Filth instead of him having to play the pre-recorded stuff, and maybe whatever else we might want her to do.’ He added with a grin.
Tora: Locker room huh?
Hiroto: You guys are performing at a Gym or something?
Saga: *Snorts* Mister Technician Man.
Aoi: From this point on, I’ll refrain from saying anything. My method of communication will be reduced to the convenience of sticky notes.
Tora: That’s ridiculous.
Aoi: *Writes on a large sheet of paper* Bullshit.
Ruki: Oh. There are so many things I’d like her to do. Like, throw herself in a mosh pit, or put her own hair on fire using hairspray.
Hiroto:…
Aoi: *Writes* IAWTC *Then draws a smiley face*
Everyone else:….
‘Awesome.’ Ruki said, sitting on the couch area in the middle of the room, all dressed and ready to go.
‘Nervous Rei?’ Reita asked Rei, who was applying white eyeliner on her eyelids.
‘Yeah. Nervous for you guys though.’ She laughed. ‘If I stuff up you’re screwed.’
Tora: Who’s Rei? Is Reita referring himself in third person with a nickname?
Hiroto: and applying eyeliner on her…eyelids?
Saga: That must be the self-insert.
Ruki: yes.
Hiroto: Since when was the GazettE a six member band? And another vocalist?
Ruki: THE GAZETTE IS ONLY A FIVE MEMBER BAND WITH ONE VOCALIST, WHICH IS ME AND WILL ONLY AND ALWAYS BE ME. NOT HER.
Aoi: *Writes* Yeah. It would definitely look weird with you standing next to the MCHMP.
Tora: What is that?
Aoi:*Writes* Multi Color Haired Midget Pirate.
Hiroto, Saga, and Tora: *Burst out laughing*
Saga: Oh God. That’s…that’s wow.
Hiroto: Pirate? So…she’s from the Caribbean or something?
Aoi and Ruki: *Shrug*
‘Which is why you wont stuff up.’ Aoi came up from behind her, snaking his arms around her waist before kissing the back of her head.
‘What’s that for?’ She asked, looking at him through the mirror.
Aoi let go of her and walked away and shrugged.
Tora: Wow. You’re touching a midget.
Ruki: With scurvy.
Hiroto: Ewwwww…
Aoi: *Writes* Ruki, if you keep mentioning that, so help me God…
Hiroto: Stuff up? You mean like…a turkey!
Saga: *Snicker*
Ruki: Wow Aoi. Your actions do speak louder than your words. You are stupid.
Aoi: *Writes* It’s because of the MCHMP.
She smiled before returning to applying the eye-make up.
She missed his spontaneity.
Aoi: *Writes* What the hell does that mean?
Hiroto: Um…impulsiveness?
Aoi: *Writes franticly*If that’s the case, she must miss my impulses of wanting to strangle her, or just kick rocks at her.
Ruki: You never explained what that meant.
Tora: I think its slang or something.
Ruki: Okay. He’s been hanging around the fans too much.
Cut. They’re on in five minutes! The apocalypse!
Okay, how do I look?’ Rei asked, turning around from the mirror to face the boys.
She was wearing her own pair of tightly fitted violet pants, which were tucked into her pirate boots, and she had on one of Aoi’s fancy black sleeveless tops with the matching arm pieces - the only reason they fitted her properly were because of her breasts, if not for them, the top would be too big - it was only a little longer on her than it would be on Aoi, and the arm pieces were only a little big on her.
Saga: You’d think that she’d get her own clothes.
Aoi: *Writes *There are just no words to describe the WTFery in this paragraph.
Hiroto: *Sings* Oh.. a pirate’s life for me…
Tora:…
Ruki: So she has implants. Big woop. /sarcasm.
Ruki had offered his clothes, but she chose Aoi’s. They all guessed why but kept their mouths shut.
Saga: She probably didn’t want to give you scurvy, Ruki.
Ruki: Should I be ecstatic about this?
Aoi: *Writes some more* There’s no way I’m touching THOSE clothes again.
She watched them from the roof of the live house as they played the first couple of songs, before they played a short song as a queue for her to get ready to come on stage.
‘Before we go on…’ Ruki said, after taking a short breather at the end of the song. ‘We’ve invited an old friend of ours to come and help me with this next song… let’s say the pre-recorded backing voices have gotten lost somewhere in Uruha’s trashed hotel room.’ He laughed.
Aoi:*Writes* We have short songs?
Ruki: This is the most ridiculous idea I have ever come across.
Tora: Who invited her?
Ruki: *Glares at Aoi*
Aoi: *Writes frantically* It wasn’t me! It was Kai, remember?
Ruki: But she’s your friend!
Hiroto: How are you a friend to a midget pirate?
Aoi: *Writes* Networking.
Ruki: You’re networking with a thief who steals clocks from warehouses and gallons of hair dye!
Hiroto: So that’s why she’s multi-colored…how do you do that? Wouldn’t her hair fall out?
Saga: Apparently, it hasn’t, since the author hasn’t mentioned it.
Tora: She needs to join the circus.
Cut again! Ruki explains how they met. Apparently, she helped Reita find his nose…whut. Helped Uruha with his fashion sense, Kai with drumming and cooking, and sharpened Ruki’s writing skills! Someone award her a Grammy!
Aoi: *Writes frantically* Fashion Sense? BWUHAHAHAHAHAH!
Ruki: There goes the time again! You can’t get rid of her!
Hiroto: How did she find Reita’s nose? Does he even still have it?
Saga: Wow Hiroto.
Ruki: She sharpened my writing skills? I believe that the only one who can sharpen my writing skills is me.
The audience gave her a polite cheer and applause, questioning who the hell she was as they watched her walk up to where Ruki was.
Ruki: As they damn well should be questioning.
Hiroto: *Points* Scurvy!
Ruki: *Looks repulsed*
‘Guys, guys, what was that, that was too polite.’ Reita said, laughing.
Tora: What?
Saga: Cheering and applauding is too polite?
Hiroto: No! Its opposite day!
Aoi: *Writes* In that case, let the whole live house of 3,000 people applaud at her.
The audience responded with a wilder and louder cheer.
Aoi: *Is appeased*
Filth in the beauty!’ Ruki said, a moment before Kai started the drums again, before Reita joined in.
Ruki: That’s not how Filth in the Beauty starts!
Aoi: *Writes* Remember. Foreshadowing.
Saga: She admitted she screwed up this part. We should just skip it then.
Tora: That sentence just hurts, as much as the author fails.
‘The reverse side of beauty, it dyed by beloved filth…’ Rei sang. ‘Sexual disgrace, the reverse side of beauty, it dyed by beloved filth… oooh oooh oooh oooh yeah!’ She screamed “yeah”, before dancing alongside Ruki as Uruha and Aoi joined in with their guitars.
Aoi and Ruki:…
Hiroto and Saga: *Giggling insanely*
Aoi: *Writes frantically* AGAIN, COMPLETE AND TOTAL BULLSHIT.
Tora: Wow. This whole entire fic is sporking itself. Does this mean we can leave?
Ruki: No it doesn’t.
Tora: Damn.
Next part!
Author: Luna Valentine
Band(s)/pairing(s): the Gazette again. / some random sue
Rating on how bad it is: On a scale of 1-10, I'd give it a 8. Everyone's so OOC,, and the OC totally reeks of Mary-Sue qualities.The grammar’s pretty bad too.
Origin: AFF.net!
I say/Notes: Hmm. This story is centered around a girl that they apparently know, and treat like a sister. She's really close to Aoi, and well...in this fic, his characterization needs a lot to be desired. Previous chapters 1, 2
There is commotion outside of the doors as Ruki sits alone in the theatre. It seems as if management is still punishing him.
Ruki: So I’m supposed to do this thing all by myself?
No one appears.
Ruki: *grumbles to himself*
Aoi suddenly bursts through the doors, looking out of breath.
Aoi: Where is everybody?
Ruki: Not here…yet. What’s up with you?
Aoi; Management tried to tag me down, so I ran into the closest room I could find.
Ruki: And you ran in here?
Aoi: Wha-*Realizes he’s in the theatre* Shit!
There is even more commotion outside, and suddenly Saga, Tora, and Hiroto are pushed through the doors.
Hiroto: What is this place? It’s too dark.
Tora: Oh boy.
Aoi: What.
Ruki: Oh hell no. There’s no way I’m doing this with-
Saga: This is weird.
Hiroto, Saga, and Tora take seats
Hiroto: Hey! How did we end up in here with you guys?
Saga: Yeah. What are the odds of this happening?
Aoi: What the fuck? If you guys are here, where’s the rest of our band?
Ruki: Management lifted the probation off of them. Lucky bastards.
Aoi:…
Hiroto: Whoa. You guys were on probation?
Ruki: *Glares*
Hiroto: *Hides*
Ruki: Let’s get this over with.
Aoi: This is total and complete bullshit.
Chapter 3- The Live
Hiroto: I love lives!
Tora; Yeah. We know.
Ruki: God. Kill me now.
alright. a noter on this one. on the Filth In The Beauty live, forgive me if i described the way the song started wrong. I'm no musician in any way =P.
Saga: ‘noter’?
Ruki: The whole fic started wrong.
Aoi: Okay. She’s warning us about the part where she screwed up the description of our song. Thanks for the foreshadowing! /sarcasm. No. Really.
but hopefully it's decent. and i dont go to many lives at all, so maybe it's a bit poor, but i tried >.<
lol
enjoy!
oh yeah, we're getting somewhere with the story, finally ^_^
Ruki: Try harder.
Aoi: Where are we in this damn thing anyway?
Saga: Wow. The fic must be really bad if you’re this nitpicky about it.
Hiroto: Hey, maybe it won’t be that bad!
Ruki: You’ll regret those words. You’ll see when you read the first paragraph.
‘Done!’ Kai returned to the locker room backstage where they were all getting ready for the live. ‘Mr Technician-Man said he’ll fix things up so Rei could sing the female bits of Filth instead of him having to play the pre-recorded stuff, and maybe whatever else we might want her to do.’ He added with a grin.
Tora: Locker room huh?
Hiroto: You guys are performing at a Gym or something?
Saga: *Snorts* Mister Technician Man.
Aoi: From this point on, I’ll refrain from saying anything. My method of communication will be reduced to the convenience of sticky notes.
Tora: That’s ridiculous.
Aoi: *Writes on a large sheet of paper* Bullshit.
Ruki: Oh. There are so many things I’d like her to do. Like, throw herself in a mosh pit, or put her own hair on fire using hairspray.
Hiroto:…
Aoi: *Writes* IAWTC *Then draws a smiley face*
Everyone else:….
‘Awesome.’ Ruki said, sitting on the couch area in the middle of the room, all dressed and ready to go.
‘Nervous Rei?’ Reita asked Rei, who was applying white eyeliner on her eyelids.
‘Yeah. Nervous for you guys though.’ She laughed. ‘If I stuff up you’re screwed.’
Tora: Who’s Rei? Is Reita referring himself in third person with a nickname?
Hiroto: and applying eyeliner on her…eyelids?
Saga: That must be the self-insert.
Ruki: yes.
Hiroto: Since when was the GazettE a six member band? And another vocalist?
Ruki: THE GAZETTE IS ONLY A FIVE MEMBER BAND WITH ONE VOCALIST, WHICH IS ME AND WILL ONLY AND ALWAYS BE ME. NOT HER.
Aoi: *Writes* Yeah. It would definitely look weird with you standing next to the MCHMP.
Tora: What is that?
Aoi:*Writes* Multi Color Haired Midget Pirate.
Hiroto, Saga, and Tora: *Burst out laughing*
Saga: Oh God. That’s…that’s wow.
Hiroto: Pirate? So…she’s from the Caribbean or something?
Aoi and Ruki: *Shrug*
‘Which is why you wont stuff up.’ Aoi came up from behind her, snaking his arms around her waist before kissing the back of her head.
‘What’s that for?’ She asked, looking at him through the mirror.
Aoi let go of her and walked away and shrugged.
Tora: Wow. You’re touching a midget.
Ruki: With scurvy.
Hiroto: Ewwwww…
Aoi: *Writes* Ruki, if you keep mentioning that, so help me God…
Hiroto: Stuff up? You mean like…a turkey!
Saga: *Snicker*
Ruki: Wow Aoi. Your actions do speak louder than your words. You are stupid.
Aoi: *Writes* It’s because of the MCHMP.
She smiled before returning to applying the eye-make up.
She missed his spontaneity.
Aoi: *Writes* What the hell does that mean?
Hiroto: Um…impulsiveness?
Aoi: *Writes franticly*If that’s the case, she must miss my impulses of wanting to strangle her, or just kick rocks at her.
Ruki: You never explained what that meant.
Tora: I think its slang or something.
Ruki: Okay. He’s been hanging around the fans too much.
Cut. They’re on in five minutes! The apocalypse!
Okay, how do I look?’ Rei asked, turning around from the mirror to face the boys.
She was wearing her own pair of tightly fitted violet pants, which were tucked into her pirate boots, and she had on one of Aoi’s fancy black sleeveless tops with the matching arm pieces - the only reason they fitted her properly were because of her breasts, if not for them, the top would be too big - it was only a little longer on her than it would be on Aoi, and the arm pieces were only a little big on her.
Saga: You’d think that she’d get her own clothes.
Aoi: *Writes *There are just no words to describe the WTFery in this paragraph.
Hiroto: *Sings* Oh.. a pirate’s life for me…
Tora:…
Ruki: So she has implants. Big woop. /sarcasm.
Ruki had offered his clothes, but she chose Aoi’s. They all guessed why but kept their mouths shut.
Saga: She probably didn’t want to give you scurvy, Ruki.
Ruki: Should I be ecstatic about this?
Aoi: *Writes some more* There’s no way I’m touching THOSE clothes again.
She watched them from the roof of the live house as they played the first couple of songs, before they played a short song as a queue for her to get ready to come on stage.
‘Before we go on…’ Ruki said, after taking a short breather at the end of the song. ‘We’ve invited an old friend of ours to come and help me with this next song… let’s say the pre-recorded backing voices have gotten lost somewhere in Uruha’s trashed hotel room.’ He laughed.
Aoi:*Writes* We have short songs?
Ruki: This is the most ridiculous idea I have ever come across.
Tora: Who invited her?
Ruki: *Glares at Aoi*
Aoi: *Writes frantically* It wasn’t me! It was Kai, remember?
Ruki: But she’s your friend!
Hiroto: How are you a friend to a midget pirate?
Aoi: *Writes* Networking.
Ruki: You’re networking with a thief who steals clocks from warehouses and gallons of hair dye!
Hiroto: So that’s why she’s multi-colored…how do you do that? Wouldn’t her hair fall out?
Saga: Apparently, it hasn’t, since the author hasn’t mentioned it.
Tora: She needs to join the circus.
Cut again! Ruki explains how they met. Apparently, she helped Reita find his nose…whut. Helped Uruha with his fashion sense, Kai with drumming and cooking, and sharpened Ruki’s writing skills! Someone award her a Grammy!
Aoi: *Writes frantically* Fashion Sense? BWUHAHAHAHAHAH!
Ruki: There goes the time again! You can’t get rid of her!
Hiroto: How did she find Reita’s nose? Does he even still have it?
Saga: Wow Hiroto.
Ruki: She sharpened my writing skills? I believe that the only one who can sharpen my writing skills is me.
The audience gave her a polite cheer and applause, questioning who the hell she was as they watched her walk up to where Ruki was.
Ruki: As they damn well should be questioning.
Hiroto: *Points* Scurvy!
Ruki: *Looks repulsed*
‘Guys, guys, what was that, that was too polite.’ Reita said, laughing.
Tora: What?
Saga: Cheering and applauding is too polite?
Hiroto: No! Its opposite day!
Aoi: *Writes* In that case, let the whole live house of 3,000 people applaud at her.
The audience responded with a wilder and louder cheer.
Aoi: *Is appeased*
Filth in the beauty!’ Ruki said, a moment before Kai started the drums again, before Reita joined in.
Ruki: That’s not how Filth in the Beauty starts!
Aoi: *Writes* Remember. Foreshadowing.
Saga: She admitted she screwed up this part. We should just skip it then.
Tora: That sentence just hurts, as much as the author fails.
‘The reverse side of beauty, it dyed by beloved filth…’ Rei sang. ‘Sexual disgrace, the reverse side of beauty, it dyed by beloved filth… oooh oooh oooh oooh yeah!’ She screamed “yeah”, before dancing alongside Ruki as Uruha and Aoi joined in with their guitars.
Aoi and Ruki:…
Hiroto and Saga: *Giggling insanely*
Aoi: *Writes frantically* AGAIN, COMPLETE AND TOTAL BULLSHIT.
Tora: Wow. This whole entire fic is sporking itself. Does this mean we can leave?
Ruki: No it doesn’t.
Tora: Damn.
Next part!