dont be sorry, believe me, your long sappy comment really made me feel better. i also re-read some of your last comments and i was starting to get a clearer image now. maybe we do have something in common in the end. like. the sad ending of the story. hm. i have to say that actually i dont feel like an *ending*. you know, when something ends, you just know it. my problem for the past 3 months has been that. we never talked. about anything. we just pretended. everything is ok. wrong. thats why i ended up writing this email. it just didnt work in person, i tried several times. but it would always deviate to some inner urge to bullshit at each other which i would always prevent. by making use of silence. or. even worse. i was this close to saying. omg a very awful nowadays absolutely banned thing. *i like you*.
i didnt. and thats how we ended this way.
i didnt allow myself to show any subtle minimal sign that i do care about him. and after that, i was definitely a trigger that made him feel insecure. sex makes men insecure, especially the non-gratifying one.
in his eyes, i turned out to be a bitch. and thats how he's been treating me for a while. in my eyes, it all turned out to be a big piece of crap and misunderstanding. and in my eyes, i will still like that adorable pretty boyish face i met in january for the first time and thats when i fell in love.
i also re-read some of your last comments and i was starting to get a clearer image now. maybe we do have something in common in the end. like. the sad ending of the story.
hm. i have to say that actually i dont feel like an *ending*. you know, when something ends, you just know it. my problem for the past 3 months has been that. we never talked. about anything. we just pretended. everything is ok.
wrong.
thats why i ended up writing this email.
it just didnt work in person, i tried several times. but it would always deviate to some inner urge to bullshit at each other which i would always prevent. by making use of silence.
or. even worse. i was this close to saying. omg a very awful nowadays absolutely banned thing. *i like you*.
i didnt. and thats how we ended this way.
i didnt allow myself to show any subtle minimal sign that i do care about him. and after that, i was definitely a trigger that made him feel insecure. sex makes men insecure, especially the non-gratifying one.
in his eyes, i turned out to be a bitch. and thats how he's been treating me for a while.
in my eyes, it all turned out to be a big piece of crap and misunderstanding.
and in my eyes, i will still like that adorable pretty boyish face i met in january for the first time and thats when i fell in love.
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