Dear Sci Fi channel,
You are not fooling anybody. Sincerely,
Nicole
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Dear me in ten years,
In 3.5 months I will be entering old age,
apparently. I'm currently trying to make the most of my last few months at my "mental peak." I hope you're enjoying being "old" (as these people would have you believe you are). You should take this article around and see if you can talk those IHOP people into letting you pay senior prices for meals. That's kind of a good deal.
Love,
Nicole, circa March 2009
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To whom it may concern:
While I enjoy St. Patrick's Day as much as the next person, I do not enjoy being pinched by anyone if I should forget to wear green. I particularly dislike being pinched if I don't really know you. I will probably either slap you or punch you hard in the arm in return if you pinch me.
You have been warned.
Suspiciously,
Nicole