family
Oh... did I mention that my mother is thinking about moving here to "help care for [her] granddaughter?"
yea... BAD idea.
You see... she gets herself into these awkward situations at work. This time, she has driven her boss mad just in time for layoffs. She was offered another position under someone who likes her at a 10,000-dollar pay cut. Instead of thinking about the economy, her age, her skill set, etc. instead of looking at the big picture, she turned down the offer and has offered to be laid off with hopes of moving to Boise under the guise of lending a helping hand. She knows Dee and I are not going to offer to let her stay here. She should know by now that there is a reason Dee and I have chosen to live a minimum of 300 miles from any member of either of our families - we are solitary people. We don't like the responsibility that comes with having family nearby. We don't like people "dropping in" uninvited. We don't like people telling us how we should live. We don't like people knowing our business. We don't like the possibility of being obligated to keep someone entertained because they've chosen to move to a town where they don't know anyone else.
I love my family and we get along... because we live so far away. The last time my mother was here, she was here for a week. By the third day, I was being honest, which is never a good thing when it comes to my mother. She does not like me when I'm honest. She tells me she wants me to be honest, but when I am, she gets really depressed and says things like, "I’m sorry I am such a bad mother," which are complete bullshit and spawn a whole new argument, which starts the downward spiral of unintentional insults. By the end of the week, I was counting the minutes until we got to leave for the airport.
She wants to help with her granddaughter? The only way she could help is to be her daycare to save us the 600 bucks/month. You really think my mother's going to get a night job, watch Zoe during the day while Dee and I work, and then sleep? NO WAY!
So... how do I tell my mother, without insulting her, that she should not move here?
yea... BAD idea.
You see... she gets herself into these awkward situations at work. This time, she has driven her boss mad just in time for layoffs. She was offered another position under someone who likes her at a 10,000-dollar pay cut. Instead of thinking about the economy, her age, her skill set, etc. instead of looking at the big picture, she turned down the offer and has offered to be laid off with hopes of moving to Boise under the guise of lending a helping hand. She knows Dee and I are not going to offer to let her stay here. She should know by now that there is a reason Dee and I have chosen to live a minimum of 300 miles from any member of either of our families - we are solitary people. We don't like the responsibility that comes with having family nearby. We don't like people "dropping in" uninvited. We don't like people telling us how we should live. We don't like people knowing our business. We don't like the possibility of being obligated to keep someone entertained because they've chosen to move to a town where they don't know anyone else.
I love my family and we get along... because we live so far away. The last time my mother was here, she was here for a week. By the third day, I was being honest, which is never a good thing when it comes to my mother. She does not like me when I'm honest. She tells me she wants me to be honest, but when I am, she gets really depressed and says things like, "I’m sorry I am such a bad mother," which are complete bullshit and spawn a whole new argument, which starts the downward spiral of unintentional insults. By the end of the week, I was counting the minutes until we got to leave for the airport.
She wants to help with her granddaughter? The only way she could help is to be her daycare to save us the 600 bucks/month. You really think my mother's going to get a night job, watch Zoe during the day while Dee and I work, and then sleep? NO WAY!
So... how do I tell my mother, without insulting her, that she should not move here?