okay so
My trip to Utah was not bad at alllll. It was sad at John's memorial service and it was really sad when we spread the ashes and it was sad here and there elsewhere. And I had wanted to go to his house at first but now I'm kind of glad I didn't because there was a brief second at some point where I thought we were going and I got such a black feeling in my stomach and I still kind of wish I had gone but I don't necessarily think it would've been a good idea.
I got to talk to some people I really adore and I got to meet some new people andddd I got to go see some really pretty shit and I figured out a lot of things annddddd I learned a lot of things. I feel like I am continuously learning and maturing in a way I haven't in a really long time.
Also I saw this guy and he had a really good nose and I always wish I could tell people something like that.
"You have the best nose I've ever seen."
God. God. I cannot fucking wait to move out of this godawful house. Fuck shit fuck I am so fucking sick of being told what to do like I can't figure it out my own damn fucking self. I am not a fucking baby anymore, believe it or fucking not, guys. I am so sick of this I am so fucking sick of it. I am sick of everything. It's like if I get mad about one thing in my life, I start to get mad about fucking everything and I can't stop and now I have to go to work and I want to punch a hole in everything's face.
I got to talk to some people I really adore and I got to meet some new people andddd I got to go see some really pretty shit and I figured out a lot of things annddddd I learned a lot of things. I feel like I am continuously learning and maturing in a way I haven't in a really long time.
Also I saw this guy and he had a really good nose and I always wish I could tell people something like that.
"You have the best nose I've ever seen."
God. God. I cannot fucking wait to move out of this godawful house. Fuck shit fuck I am so fucking sick of being told what to do like I can't figure it out my own damn fucking self. I am not a fucking baby anymore, believe it or fucking not, guys. I am so sick of this I am so fucking sick of it. I am sick of everything. It's like if I get mad about one thing in my life, I start to get mad about fucking everything and I can't stop and now I have to go to work and I want to punch a hole in everything's face.