its an emo dramatic post. skip it if you hate self-agonizing.
i wish if he wanted nothing to do with me that he would just say so and then i could cry myself to sleep a couple nights in a row and begin to heal. i've been reopening old wounds just to make sure they still hurt. they do. and i can't let go.
i get the distinct sense that he's trying to avoid me now and i don't know how or why they got to this point. i don't know what i did or if i even did anything or this is just at her bidding. but i am NOT handling it well. so maybe she's right to not want him talking to me...
i wouldn't want me back in this state.
i gained 4 pounds since january and i hate my body more than i ever have...i ran twice this week...need to start doing it more i guess to get myself to acceptable. and stop eating fluffernutter sandwiches. thank god aerobics starts in 2 weeks.
i could try and date but it would be unfair to whomever comes into my life when i'm so attached to something that is long gone....but i can't convince myself that it is.
"A head that aches doesn’t have to stay that way, just let what’s dead go.
I know there's pain in leaving things all too well.
In time, you’ll find needing things only kills you slowly.
If you’re not sure who you are, you’re not alone.
If you’re not sure what you want, you’re not alone.
If you’re not sure of life of love, you’re not alone.
Tell your friends, hey come on over and we'll talk. You bring the drinks, I’ll bring the bad news.
Everyone feels like you.
Tell your dad to come on over and we’ll talk, you bring your drinks, I’ll bring the fuck you’s.
Long awaited - long overdue...."
i get the distinct sense that he's trying to avoid me now and i don't know how or why they got to this point. i don't know what i did or if i even did anything or this is just at her bidding. but i am NOT handling it well. so maybe she's right to not want him talking to me...
i wouldn't want me back in this state.
i gained 4 pounds since january and i hate my body more than i ever have...i ran twice this week...need to start doing it more i guess to get myself to acceptable. and stop eating fluffernutter sandwiches. thank god aerobics starts in 2 weeks.
i could try and date but it would be unfair to whomever comes into my life when i'm so attached to something that is long gone....but i can't convince myself that it is.
"A head that aches doesn’t have to stay that way, just let what’s dead go.
I know there's pain in leaving things all too well.
In time, you’ll find needing things only kills you slowly.
If you’re not sure who you are, you’re not alone.
If you’re not sure what you want, you’re not alone.
If you’re not sure of life of love, you’re not alone.
Tell your friends, hey come on over and we'll talk. You bring the drinks, I’ll bring the bad news.
Everyone feels like you.
Tell your dad to come on over and we’ll talk, you bring your drinks, I’ll bring the fuck you’s.
Long awaited - long overdue...."