Richie/Carts kinky chatfic
I've been meaning to post this for a while (or at least, as long as puckling has been nagging me to do so). Here it is, an unfiltered look at my id, aka Jeff Carter in a French maid's uniform. Somewhat unedited, but mostly left as is.
me: i want richie to fuck carts into the fucking wall
puckling: agreeeeeed
me: oh god, i have the most shameful, kinky fantasy starring those two
puckling: DO TELL
me: with like richards shaving cartsy all over
and putting him in a french maid uniform
puckling: :D
me: and licking him until he's on all fours
and calling him a "dirty little slut"
puckling: yiiiiiiiiis
me: and like teasing him with his huge cock, saying "you want this, don't you?"
and like coming all over his hole and his back
and asdfasdjlfasjkldd
puckling: yis
yis this is a good one
me: I WANTS IT SO BAD, puckling
SO BAD
puckling: does he have Carts wearing undies?
me: YESSSSSSSSSSS
FRILLY WHITE ONES
puckling: \o/
they match his dress, clearly
me: YES.
oh god, he makes him wear the frilly, lacy top, too, even though carts doesn't have tits, but richie likes seeing his nipples through it
puckling: and after all, he doesn't have any chest hair
me: nope, and that's how richie likes it
puckling: the ball shaving is probably a delicate operation
me: .... oh god YES
carts probably squirms so much that richie is forced to tie him down. "i'm only doing this because you're being a bad boy."
puckling: \o/
there's probably spanking
me: YOU KNOW IT
god, carts is so pale, especially when he first moves from columbus to LA that every finger shows up on carts's ass
puckling: :D
And ended up with this.
puckling: tell me more about Cart's and Richie's kinky sex life. I need to know. For science
me: heeee
well, obviously, richie makes carts put that french maid uniform to good use
puckling: um, yes
me: he likes it when he cleans the kitchen on all his knees
or when he's reaching up to dust something on a high shelf
and richie likes to just slide his hand around his waist
puckling: I bet for those times there is no underwear
easy access
me: so when he dips his hand underneath the tiny skirt, he just feels carts's cock
or god, tracing the line where his hip meets his ass
fitting that sweet curve underneath his hand
puckling: :D
me: and richie LOVES cartsy's mouth
(for reference: http://nyrnation.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/nhl_g_carter_576.jpg)
puckling: gotcha
me: he loves teasing carts by putting just the head of his cock onto his lower lip
squeezing out a drop of precome onto that pout
puckling: uuuuunf
me: telling him to open up (but no licking), and slowly fucking his way into carts's mouth
the french maid uniform mostly hanging off of him
on his knees
puckling: \o/
me: with his hands behind his back
sometimes he likes to surprise carts with a toy
puckling: http://cltampa.com/imager/kinky-sex-goes-mainstream/b/original/2266955/b4e6/french_maid_bondage.jpg
I feel like this should be inspiration to this fic
me: like a black and silver (KINGS BABY) butt plug. and he makes carts open the discreetly wrapped package, and richie loves
the way his eyes get all wide
OMG OMG YESSSSSSS
puckling: :D
me: oooh, maybe these: http://xdress.com/product/view/Z128
oh god, especially with the slit opening in the back.
for better rimming access.
richie wants that tight hole to be accessible to him at all times
puckling: um, yes
me: sometimes his favorite thing is to just press carts to the nearest vertical surface, drop to his knees, and go to town on that
ass
licking and fucking into it with his tongue until carts can't stand up anymore
puckling: :D
me: ugh, i just have so so many kinky feelings about them, puckling
i want richie to humiliate carts
puckling: yiiiiiiiiiiis
me: and come all over him
and rub his come into his lips and over his cheeks
and then cuddle with him
puckling: I JUST WANT TO LIKE
me: and then take arnold for a walk on the beach
puckling: COSIGN ALL OF THIS
me: oh god, when did jeff carter wearing panties become the thing i want most from fic?
puckling: HAHHAHAH
me: OOOOH, IDEA:
idk how this would work logistically, but they role play so that richie is picking up carts dressed as a girl
oh oh
maybe it starts as a joke
puckling: Halloween?
me: like, ha, bet you can't pick me up with your horrible lines
and then it turns into like richie turning on the full, soft-spoken canadian charm
puckling: Oh man, Halloween, Carts is dressed like a French maid, and bets Richie that his pick up lines suck
and he totally can't pick up
AND THEN SOFT-SPOKEN CANADIAN CHARM
:D
and Carter having a huge boner in a the bar while Richie talks about how he wants to eat his pussy out, even though clearly he
doesn't have a pussy, but yet SO HOT?
me: right, and clearly this is kinda turning into gay chicken of some sort (gay chicken dressed up in ladies' underwear)
puckling: yeeeeep
me: and richie is all, let's take this somewhere more private
and they stumble into the nearest bathroom stall (richie is so klassy with a k), and richie is still talking to carts like he's a girl
puckling: yeeeeeeees
me: and he's fondling his fake breasts, which aren't even attached to any nerve endings jeff has, but it still goes straight to his dick
and richie is sliding a hand up carts's skirt, and carts lets out this super-embarrassing groan
which totally breaks the spell, and the two of them laugh really awkwardly about it, and carter has to adjust himself and stumble
out into the club/party/whatever
puckling: UUUUUGH
me: but what he can't see is richie making a turned-on and speculative face behind him
:D
puckling: :D
THEN WHAT HAPPENS?
me: then obvs, neither of them can get that night out of their heads
and idk, when richie notices that carter kept his clothes (and undies) from that night, he realizes that the two of them should totally
bone
puckling: \o/
me: so he waits at home one night (on one of the rare occasions the two of them don't spend together) with the outfit laid out on
the ottoman in the living room
and carts just blanches when he comes home and almost comes in his pants right then and there
and richie just tells him, "put it on."
puckling: :D
does he change in front of Richie?
me: oh god, mmmm. YES.
and richie just watches him (douchily) the whole time, with his legs spread wide open, but still fully dressed
puckling: I like to think that the skirt is short enough that every time Jeff bends over Richie can see his underwear
me: god yes, like the slut that jeff totally is.
(do you think that carter is a blusher?)
puckling: (unfortunately not, he doesn't have the complexion for it)
me: (damn it)
me: the thing is, i'm not sure if richie and carter just keep having all this amazing sex (with jeff in panties) without ever coming to
any sort of emotional resolution or what
puckling: no, they live happily and douchily ever after clearly, but that's less interesting than the kinky sex in french maid outfits
Arnold is their feelings child, etc etc
Le fin. I blame puckling. For everything.
me: i want richie to fuck carts into the fucking wall
puckling: agreeeeeed
me: oh god, i have the most shameful, kinky fantasy starring those two
puckling: DO TELL
me: with like richards shaving cartsy all over
and putting him in a french maid uniform
puckling: :D
me: and licking him until he's on all fours
and calling him a "dirty little slut"
puckling: yiiiiiiiiis
me: and like teasing him with his huge cock, saying "you want this, don't you?"
and like coming all over his hole and his back
and asdfasdjlfasjkldd
puckling: yis
yis this is a good one
me: I WANTS IT SO BAD, puckling
SO BAD
puckling: does he have Carts wearing undies?
me: YESSSSSSSSSSS
FRILLY WHITE ONES
puckling: \o/
they match his dress, clearly
me: YES.
oh god, he makes him wear the frilly, lacy top, too, even though carts doesn't have tits, but richie likes seeing his nipples through it
puckling: and after all, he doesn't have any chest hair
me: nope, and that's how richie likes it
puckling: the ball shaving is probably a delicate operation
me: .... oh god YES
carts probably squirms so much that richie is forced to tie him down. "i'm only doing this because you're being a bad boy."
puckling: \o/
there's probably spanking
me: YOU KNOW IT
god, carts is so pale, especially when he first moves from columbus to LA that every finger shows up on carts's ass
puckling: :D
And ended up with this.
puckling: tell me more about Cart's and Richie's kinky sex life. I need to know. For science
me: heeee
well, obviously, richie makes carts put that french maid uniform to good use
puckling: um, yes
me: he likes it when he cleans the kitchen on all his knees
or when he's reaching up to dust something on a high shelf
and richie likes to just slide his hand around his waist
puckling: I bet for those times there is no underwear
easy access
me: so when he dips his hand underneath the tiny skirt, he just feels carts's cock
or god, tracing the line where his hip meets his ass
fitting that sweet curve underneath his hand
puckling: :D
me: and richie LOVES cartsy's mouth
(for reference: http://nyrnation.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/nhl_g_carter_576.jpg)
puckling: gotcha
me: he loves teasing carts by putting just the head of his cock onto his lower lip
squeezing out a drop of precome onto that pout
puckling: uuuuunf
me: telling him to open up (but no licking), and slowly fucking his way into carts's mouth
the french maid uniform mostly hanging off of him
on his knees
puckling: \o/
me: with his hands behind his back
sometimes he likes to surprise carts with a toy
puckling: http://cltampa.com/imager/kinky-sex-goes-mainstream/b/original/2266955/b4e6/french_maid_bondage.jpg
I feel like this should be inspiration to this fic
me: like a black and silver (KINGS BABY) butt plug. and he makes carts open the discreetly wrapped package, and richie loves
the way his eyes get all wide
OMG OMG YESSSSSSS
puckling: :D
me: oooh, maybe these: http://xdress.com/product/view/Z128
oh god, especially with the slit opening in the back.
for better rimming access.
richie wants that tight hole to be accessible to him at all times
puckling: um, yes
me: sometimes his favorite thing is to just press carts to the nearest vertical surface, drop to his knees, and go to town on that
ass
licking and fucking into it with his tongue until carts can't stand up anymore
puckling: :D
me: ugh, i just have so so many kinky feelings about them, puckling
i want richie to humiliate carts
puckling: yiiiiiiiiiiis
me: and come all over him
and rub his come into his lips and over his cheeks
and then cuddle with him
puckling: I JUST WANT TO LIKE
me: and then take arnold for a walk on the beach
puckling: COSIGN ALL OF THIS
me: oh god, when did jeff carter wearing panties become the thing i want most from fic?
puckling: HAHHAHAH
me: OOOOH, IDEA:
idk how this would work logistically, but they role play so that richie is picking up carts dressed as a girl
oh oh
maybe it starts as a joke
puckling: Halloween?
me: like, ha, bet you can't pick me up with your horrible lines
and then it turns into like richie turning on the full, soft-spoken canadian charm
puckling: Oh man, Halloween, Carts is dressed like a French maid, and bets Richie that his pick up lines suck
and he totally can't pick up
AND THEN SOFT-SPOKEN CANADIAN CHARM
:D
and Carter having a huge boner in a the bar while Richie talks about how he wants to eat his pussy out, even though clearly he
doesn't have a pussy, but yet SO HOT?
me: right, and clearly this is kinda turning into gay chicken of some sort (gay chicken dressed up in ladies' underwear)
puckling: yeeeeep
me: and richie is all, let's take this somewhere more private
and they stumble into the nearest bathroom stall (richie is so klassy with a k), and richie is still talking to carts like he's a girl
puckling: yeeeeeeees
me: and he's fondling his fake breasts, which aren't even attached to any nerve endings jeff has, but it still goes straight to his dick
and richie is sliding a hand up carts's skirt, and carts lets out this super-embarrassing groan
which totally breaks the spell, and the two of them laugh really awkwardly about it, and carter has to adjust himself and stumble
out into the club/party/whatever
puckling: UUUUUGH
me: but what he can't see is richie making a turned-on and speculative face behind him
:D
puckling: :D
THEN WHAT HAPPENS?
me: then obvs, neither of them can get that night out of their heads
and idk, when richie notices that carter kept his clothes (and undies) from that night, he realizes that the two of them should totally
bone
puckling: \o/
me: so he waits at home one night (on one of the rare occasions the two of them don't spend together) with the outfit laid out on
the ottoman in the living room
and carts just blanches when he comes home and almost comes in his pants right then and there
and richie just tells him, "put it on."
puckling: :D
does he change in front of Richie?
me: oh god, mmmm. YES.
and richie just watches him (douchily) the whole time, with his legs spread wide open, but still fully dressed
puckling: I like to think that the skirt is short enough that every time Jeff bends over Richie can see his underwear
me: god yes, like the slut that jeff totally is.
(do you think that carter is a blusher?)
puckling: (unfortunately not, he doesn't have the complexion for it)
me: (damn it)
me: the thing is, i'm not sure if richie and carter just keep having all this amazing sex (with jeff in panties) without ever coming to
any sort of emotional resolution or what
puckling: no, they live happily and douchily ever after clearly, but that's less interesting than the kinky sex in french maid outfits
Arnold is their feelings child, etc etc
Le fin. I blame puckling. For everything.