Halloween!
Halloween came and Halloween has gone as quick as it had come.Yet For some reason i still feel like shit. ~Sigh~
I don't remember why i felt liek shit to begin with. I often wonder lately why i was allowed to live as long as i have already. I Think it's all Candice's fault. If it wasn't for her who know's where i'd be now. Or what i would be doing. I Had often wondered if it's my own fault because of my hormone's. Yes my hormones are my problem. I Don't know why i'm such a retard sometimes but i can't help but realize how much of a fuck up i really am. Sometime's it take's a man to be a man. A role model ,if you will sometimes. I Thought my problem could have been some kind of addiction but it's not it's just my retarded hormone's out of check. Yes i know she never complains. Hell i dont know one person who ever complained about something like that. That's not the point however. The Point is I wodner if she thinks of herself over everyone else first. I Would Lay my life on the line to keep her safe. But I wonder if she feels the same emotions I do when were together. Sometime's I doubt that she really love's me. Sometimes I doubt that this is all real. It all feels like a long never ending dream. I Only want to be able to do something with my life worth remembering. But we all know that will never happen so that's a dream best forgotten. No one reads this anymore so I geuss it wouldn't matter if anyone reads this or not. I Wonder IF I could ever be a good father or even a good husband sometime's. I just think what if I screw those up as well. It's a sickening thought that i could very well screw either of those two up. I would rather die then screw it up. I Always seem so happy Yet sometimes I don't know why. I'm always polite,nice,kind and everyone I know like's that about me. I don't know why I am so nice it's just how I grew up on the inside. I always try to solve thing peacefully and so far it's all good. I Wonder if i'm even really typing this how can i be sure of anything.
If anyone actually take's the time to read this then good if not then oh well
Either way this is Nicholas Joseph Giunta
And hopefully other people are sure of there existence.
-N.J.G
-No Good
I don't remember why i felt liek shit to begin with. I often wonder lately why i was allowed to live as long as i have already. I Think it's all Candice's fault. If it wasn't for her who know's where i'd be now. Or what i would be doing. I Had often wondered if it's my own fault because of my hormone's. Yes my hormones are my problem. I Don't know why i'm such a retard sometimes but i can't help but realize how much of a fuck up i really am. Sometime's it take's a man to be a man. A role model ,if you will sometimes. I Thought my problem could have been some kind of addiction but it's not it's just my retarded hormone's out of check. Yes i know she never complains. Hell i dont know one person who ever complained about something like that. That's not the point however. The Point is I wodner if she thinks of herself over everyone else first. I Would Lay my life on the line to keep her safe. But I wonder if she feels the same emotions I do when were together. Sometime's I doubt that she really love's me. Sometimes I doubt that this is all real. It all feels like a long never ending dream. I Only want to be able to do something with my life worth remembering. But we all know that will never happen so that's a dream best forgotten. No one reads this anymore so I geuss it wouldn't matter if anyone reads this or not. I Wonder IF I could ever be a good father or even a good husband sometime's. I just think what if I screw those up as well. It's a sickening thought that i could very well screw either of those two up. I would rather die then screw it up. I Always seem so happy Yet sometimes I don't know why. I'm always polite,nice,kind and everyone I know like's that about me. I don't know why I am so nice it's just how I grew up on the inside. I always try to solve thing peacefully and so far it's all good. I Wonder if i'm even really typing this how can i be sure of anything.
If anyone actually take's the time to read this then good if not then oh well
Either way this is Nicholas Joseph Giunta
And hopefully other people are sure of there existence.
-N.J.G
-No Good