For Worse (log)
Who: Axel [roxascomplex], Rikku Mashino [upbeatprincess] and Roxas [oathtooblivion]
Where: Rikku's house. Ooo, creative.
When: 17th March, around about twilight.
Summary: Well, prequel to how the log came to be. Basically, Axel comes to New Sanctum looking for Roxas, and finds Rikku. Rikku of course, knows Roxas, and told Axel so, so brought him back with her to her place. A while later, Rikku mentions it to Roxas, and Roxas says he'll come visit. So Axel and Roxas reunite, but it's not the best reunion ever. Angst.
Notes: Title is kinda like a spin of of the phrase 'For Better or For Worse'. Axel's first appearance, so read, why don'tcha? And it's also Rikku's first log-appearance too XD; anyway, we all want to see how badly poor Axel takes his loves' friends' reaction to not knowing him. AND THE ANGST. D8
For a late afternoon in March, the weather was surprisingly warm. The sun was quickly descending towards the horizon, making Roxas’ shadow stretch beside him as he walked down Rikku’s street and casting the sky in fiery shades of golden, red and orange. But not even the beautiful sunset or the warm weather could improve Roxas’ mood; whoever this Axel person Rikku mentioned was, Roxas was starting to think coming to see him wasn’t such a good idea.
As always, however, his curiosity bested him and he rung Rikku’s doorbell before he could change his mind. Rikku had already told Axel she knew Roxas, and she had probably also told him Roxas would be coming. There wasn’t much point in turning back now.
As the doorbell rang, Rikku darted out from her workroom, almost knocking her poor Brother flying in the opposite direction who had - quite calmly - been about to open the door. Eying her suspiciously, Rikku replied to him with a swift nod, simply stating 'Friend.' With that, he left her alone, to return to whatever he had just previously been doing.
Opening the door, she smiled. "Hello, Roxas!" she said brightly, but with a little less enthusiam than usual.
“Hey, Rikku,” Roxas replied, glancing behind Rikku almost as if expecting Axel to be standing right behind her. Seeing he was not (not that Roxas even knew what he looked like, even if he was there), Roxas’ attention was back on Rikku. “You sound kinda… not as cheery as you normally are. Something up?”
Rikku sighed, but half laughed at the same time. "Oh, Axel," she said, her voice filling with dread. Axel, for the past day, had spent it literally bouncing off the walls, and only in the last half an hour had he taken to inhabiting Rikku's room, messing with her computer for some unknown reason. In truth, Axel was like a small puppy dog, that when it did not get attention it suffered from withdrawel symptoms. And Rikku was obviously, the one who had to give him the attention - being the fact she was the one who brought him home. "He's... tiring."
"He's that bad?" Roxas blinked. Rikku's energy normally seemed boundless, but if this guy could even wear the likes of Rikku down, Roxas probably really should've just left there and then, but instead he stepped inside and looked around. "So, um, where abouts is he?"
"In my room," she said slowly, glancing vaguely up the stairwell to the quiet corridor beyond. She wondered if really, inside her room, he was being quiet, or being as loud as ever. "He's just a very... well..." she shut the door behind Roxas. "... excited to see you?" she guessed.
Roxas frowned. "But I don't even know him. And what's so exciting about meeting me, anyway?" he shrugged it off, deciding he would find out soon enough, and as he didn't know which room was Rikku's he waited for her to lead the way.
Rikku shrugged. "Maybe he knows you but you don't know him," she suggested, though highly doubted the possibility. She looked around, and pointed to a randomly placed chair outside her workroom. "Wait here, I'll go and get him," she said. She doubted taking Roxas up there was a very good idea.
Inside Rikku's room, having decidedly made it his 'own' to a degree - most likely by the amount of sweet wrappers, drinks, and various other foods - was Axel, staring wide-eyed at the computer. His face was fixed, and for once, he seemed like a relatively calm individual, tactical and skilled. His red hair contrasted vividly with his green eyes, whilst vague remains of twilight hung in the air around him. At the sound of footsteps, he turned to his right, gazing at the door as Rikku opened it.
"Oh. It's you," he said bluntly, turning back to the computer, seemlingly wondering if they were going to have another session of 'Rikku-forcefully-dragging-Axel-out-of-her-room-but-failing'.
Rikku casually walked in, looking in distate at the mess Axel had managed to make in the space of half an hour. She looked back up at him, blinking. "I have something to tell you, you might be interested..."
"What?" Axel asked, spinning around on her chair to face her, still emotionless.
Rikku wrung her hands, wondering how best to phrase the fact 'Roxas was here.' "Well... Roxas is...downstairs...."
"Roxas?!" Axel said, immediately leaping up and running straight out of the room, sending Rikku reeling on the other side of the corridor, causing Brother to look in concern at him, and more than likely, Roxas probably heard him as well.
When Roxas heard his name mentioned by an unfamiliar voice, he went to the bottom of the stairs and looked up. He supposed this odd-looking person was Axel, but even seeing him didn't make Roxas any the wiser on just who he was. Eventually, he said uneasily, "...Axel?"
Axel stood there, looking down at Roxas, panting as if he'd run a marathon, wearas he'd only run a few metres. He breathed in and out, really unable to accept the fact he'd finally found Roxas after all this time. True, he didn't seem too like he had been before - different clothing and the like - but it was definately Roxas. He breathed a few more times, before managing to say, "So... you do remember me?"
Roxas blinked silently and raised an eyebrow, watching Axel for a moment. Was he suggesting that Roxas had met him beforehand at some point? Roxas didn't have many friends - or acquaintances, for that matter, so he remembered most people he'd met before. And he definitely did not know Axel. "Um, what? I don't think I've ever met you before."
"What...." Axel said slowly, looking momentarily confused, then he sighed, chuckling to himself with a hint of despair. So, he did mess with his memories. But still...
"You really sure?" he said, taking the stairs one at a time till he was a few from the bottom, leaning on the edge of the banister, looking back down at him.
"Sure I'm sure," Roxas said, rubbing the back of his head in embarassment. He was partly feeling bad because Axel looked so crestfallen, and partly uneasy just by Axel's mere presence, and when Axel began down the stairs Roxas backed away. "Do you know me, or something?"
"Course I do," Axel said, waving his hand in the air casually. "But you obviously don't... for some reason," he concluded, jumping down the last two steps, thoughtful. "What did he do to you, Roxas?"
Roxas' eyes narrowed, his hands balling into fists without him realising it. Was Axel trying to play mind games? Was this an elaborate joke from Rikku? Everything about Axel, from his cryptic speech to his unfathomable expression to his long black cloak, was suspicious. Tensely, he asked, "Who?"
"So, how long have you been here?" Axel asked, rapidly changing the subject - deliberately, or not deliberately, but his motive was clear that he was not going to tell Roxas who he was talking about.
"Been where?" he asked, his tone quickly changing to one of annoyance. Axel was making no sense, purposefully or not, and Roxas was finding it incredibly frustrating. No wonder Rikku was so worn-down. "If you mean Rikku's house, I just got here a few minutes ago."
Axel looked at him again, from where he had suddenly become massively interested in the carvings on the banister. Walking right up beside him with surprising agility, he half chuckled again. "No. Not right here. New Sanctum."
This time, Roxas didn't back away, instead staring directly at Axel as though trying to puzzle him out. "What sort of a question is that?"
One couldn't really say he returned Roxas' stare calmly, but Axel did indeed return it. "A question," he said bluntly, not moving much in paticular, but his gaze started wavering. "Darn, looks like I won't find out anything..."
Roxas' patience finally gave way, so he asked the question he'd wanted to ask all along. "Who are you?"
Axel broadly smiled. "Axel. A-X-E-L. Got it memorized?"
"Your name doesn't tell me who you are," Roxas pressed stubbornly with a scowl, but he doubted he'd get any more out of him.
"I'm nobody..." Axel started, wondering weather to continue taunting him or just stop and give in to the fact already that Roxas did not know who he was. "... you... know what I mean."
"No, but I know you're not making any sense," Roxas replied fiercely. "Who are you, how do you know me and what do you want with me? Give me a straight answer or don't give me one at all."
Axel placed his hands on his hips, cocking his head to one side. "You really don't remember," he said simply. He must have really messed him up, then. Nothing. Except the anger here, that is similar to how he was before.... he thought to himself, remaining silent for the interval.
Roxas merely glared at Axel and folded his arms, until the silence dragged on and Roxas had cooled his temper considerably. Time to try Axel at his own game. "If you're not gonna tell me anything, I might as well leave."
At that remark, Axel seemlingly came back to life, leaping forward and blocking the doorway. "No, you can't leave! I want to tell you, but... I can't... because..." he started, unable to stop himself. "...we're friends..."
Roxas was so taken aback at that, a surprised, "What?!" was all he could manage to say. This guy's enjoying messing with my head... Roxas thought silently, sitting on the second to bottom step of the stairs and massaging his temples. "...How can we be friends? I've never even met you before."
Albeit, Axel was never destined to answer that, as a loud, screaming, annoyed like voice came from upstairs. Decidedly thinking about making a run for it, he didn't get too far before a rather flushed Rikku appeared at the top of the stairs.
"AXEL!" she huffed, placing one hand on the wall beside her, then running down the stairs in blind rage. Whatever he'd done made her blatently miss the fact Roxas was there, tripping right into him and sending them both crashing to the floor at the bottom of the stairs - fortunately only a few centimetres away.
Roxas attempted to say 'ouch' but since Rikku had managed to land on his chest he was finding it difficult to breath, never mind speak. Fortunately, aside from most likely a few bruises he wasn't hurt, however. He shoved Rikku roughly off him and took a moment to regain his breath before directing at Rikku, "W-what the heck just happened?"
About to get up and taunt Axel a bit more, her plans were foiled when she was shoved off onto the floor, momentarily winding her. After a few seconds Rikku managed to bring herself back up, to hear Roxas' question. Looking betweem him and Axel, as if deciding which was the best fight, she turned to Roxas.
"He... he..." she say begrudingly, never actually getting around to tell Roxas exactly what Axel had done. "... and then I came here, and I didn't see you, and fell," she continued, perking up and speaking overly fast for the last setence.
Axel, however, as if in an attempt to taunt her just a tad more, placed himself on the seat Roxas had previously inhabited, settling himself to watch the display in front of him.
"...Okay," Roxas said, hoisting himself up to stand again and brushing himself off. After a sideways glance at Axel, he looked back at Rikku, pretending he hadn't as much as noticed him. "So, uh, what did Axel do?"
"He.... he..." she said, keeping her gaze fixed on the edge of the stairs, as if she as much as moved she'd explode. "KILLED my computer! There's a virus on my system! And when I fixed that he'd...." she gulped, clenching her fists. "He'd drawn stick figures of himself in all of the pictures of me and the family..."
Which, was something so idiotic that only Axel would do it.
Roxas couldn't help but laugh despite himself, but he was still determinedly ignoring Axel. "Guess that's what you get for letting strangers on your computer, huh?" he said, putting emphasis on the word 'strangers'.
"Maybe..." she said, not really amused that Roxas found the entire scenario humorous. "But... only.... idiots would do something like that..." she said, turning back to glare at Axel, who was putting on the most innocent face he could muster - as if he was now a completely different person.
Roxas stuffed his hands in his pockets and his smile faded as he finally looked back at Axel. He was tempted to ask just what Axel was doing on her computer to start with, but he doubted Axel would tell him. The most Roxas had managed to get out of Axel was an accidental outburst. "What was he doing on your computer anyway, Rikku?"
Rikku opened her mouth as if to say something, but ended up closing it again. "What... what were you doing?" she asked, her voice relatively even.
Axel blinked, surprised at being addressed. "Who, me? I was..." he pondered for an answer. "... I was... practicing my artwork, oh yes. Paint Shop Pro is a wonderful invention, you know that?" he said, all the more matter-of-fact-ly.
Roxas had no idea what Paint Shop Pro was, but he didn't need to know to realise Axel was most likely lying. "You have a lot of free time, don't you?" Roxas asked casually.
"Oooh, not really," Axel replied, rubbing his chin. "I've got... winding Rikku up... looking for you... being told you don't remember me... being chased by people... I'm quite booked," he nodded, counting off each article on his fingers.
"You were looking for me and being chased, but you have time to practise your artwork. Sure," Well, that confirmed that asking indirect questions got you more answers than direct ones. Roxas would have to keep that in mind.
Axel raised an eyebrow. "I told you, it was for winding Rikku up," he said, making to pat her on the head but being given the most evil glare possible, making his hand recoil last minute.
"Anyway," Rikku interrupted, her curiousity and general nosy-ness getting the better of her. "How do you guys know each other? HUH?"
"I don't know him," Roxas said hastily with a shrug before Axel could reply. "He says he knows me, but I've never met him before in my life. And he refuses to tell me anything other than that."
Axel jumped up, again running off to Roxas and looking like he was going to shake him, but deciding he would be better leaving that for the meantime. "But Roxas! We're... best friends!"
Roxas would have backed away yet again, but with Rikku also in the hall it was becoming rather cramped so he had to settle for an expression that plainly said, 'get the hell away from me, weirdo'. "I've never met you in my life, I've told you," Roxas repeated. "Unless you always decide to be best friends with total strangers, I don't think we are."
"But..." Axel said desperately, as if he reall was running out of ways to get through to Roxas without revealing anything. He was, however, cut short.
Rikku suddenly appeared on Roxas' right shoulder, her face set. "And besides, I'm Roxas' best friend, dude!"
Roxas definitely didn't see that coming. Roxas considered Rikku a friend, but a best friend? "Uh, sure," Roxas said, but he didn't sound very convinced. If it was going to change Axel's mind, he was willing to go along with it.
Rikku's face brightned at that, seemlingly oblivious to the very unsure tone he carried. "See?"
Axel looked from one to the other, and laughed. "Having fun with little friends, eh?" he commented emotionlessly. "But don't kid yourself. I'm his best friend."
"Assuming you were my best friend," Roxas began, his temper once again flaring, "you're not acting like one. You were looking for me, then when you met me, you refused to tell me a single thing even about yourself or why you're here."
Axel screwed his face up for a moment, putting on the most sympathetic voice he had in him. "I want to tell you, I just can't," he repeated. "You don't remember anything, it's way too dangerous..."
Rikku blinked, her face almost blank. "Hey, Roxas, do you think he knows something we don't?"
Roxas fixed Rikku with a look, then replied to Axel frustratedly, "You're doing it now! I can't ask you anything without you talking in riddles!"
"I'm not," Axel said, almost a little too calmly. He had and often did speak in worse riddles than this - this was plain obvious. "DiZ really did mess you up..." he said under his breath, before realising what he'd just said, covering his mouth but realizing it was already too late. "Ahhhh, shoot. What comes around comes around, I suppose."
Roxas' Keyblade was at Axel's throat before it could even fully appear. He didn't even care that Rikku was there any more in his anger. Roxas was certain Axel knew everything about... well, everything, all the questions he'd been bursting to ask the past few months. Although his voice was quiet, it quivered with rage. "Tell me everything," This time it wasn't a question, either, it was a command.
Axel's eyes moved to look downwards, spotting the keyblade - not Roxas' old, usual one, but a keyblade none the less. Perhaps he was not as helpless as he'd first thought. You still remember the old ways... he mused to himself. However, came the pressing arrangement of Roxas' quesiton. Answer it, or not?
"Perhaps," he said, never taking his eyes of the keyblade. He wasn't too worried about it - afterall he did have his chakrams - but he would rather not fight in his temporary lodgings. And he supposed Rikku wouldn't be too happy about it either. In fact, Rikku was being surprsingly quiet, just taking the whole scenario in. Having being distracted, his eyes wandered back to Roxas. ".... in part."
"Everything," Roxas glared, studying Axel's expression intently. "I'm tired of questions I don't know the answer to, I don't want any more."
"... fine," Axel eventually agreed, summing up the chances of Roxas actually killing him if he told him nothing. He'd find a way to skip some things later, he didn't need to know everything right now.
The Keyblade disappeared again and Roxas' hand dropped back to his side, but he continued to glare at Axel. If he wasn't so mistrusting of him, he'd ask that they spoke in private and away from Rikku, but Roxas had no idea what he'd try to pull if they were alone. "I suppose my only choice is to take your word that you will."
Axel nodded, partially smirking. "That you will."
Having remained perfectly silent till now, Rikku was rather - or not too much, but still - shocked at what was going on in front of her. And from her on in, things did not look like they were going to get much prettier. Creeping forward in case Roxas lunged out at her again, she tapped him on the shoulder. "Roxas..?"
Roxas flinched and jumped involuntarily, tearing his gaze reluctantly away from Axel and to Rikku. "What?!" he snapped. Realising he was taking his emotions out on Rikku, he attempted a smile, which looked more like a grimace than anything. "Sorry, what?"
Flinching slightly at his response, Rikku calmed herself down before she jumped backwards into the wall. "Do you..." she wrung her hands, looking at the floor, but eventually tearing her eyes away and back up at Roxas, her eyes serious. "... want me to... leave...?"
"I don't mind. You can leave if you want to," In reality, Roxas would have preferred if Rikku stayed, to restrain himself from kicking Axel into a bloody pulp until he spat out what Roxas wanted to know - and all of it. Right now, with Axel's big stupid smirk on his face, it was very tempting.
Rikku looked around, seemlingly trying to decide on the best course of action. As if realisation hit her face, she grabbed hold of Roxas' sleeve, and Axel's, proceeding to drag them through the interior of the house till she reached the back door, pushing them both through into a pretty open, but relatively small, yard area. "You can talk here..." she said simply. "I'll just sit by the door, and... if you want me... you know where I am."
"Fine," Roxas said, without looking at either Rikku or Axel. Striding into the middle of the yard and taking a breath of fresh air, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and was silent with his back to both of them, waiting for Axel to speak. He didn't trust at all that Axel would tell him everything, but what he didn't know he'd just have to try and find out for himself.
Nodding, Rikku looked at Axel, with a stare of 'you-mess-with-him-you-mess-with-me' qualities, and bounded off to the doorway, sitting herself down on the cold paved footpath, watching the world go by.
Upon her departure, Axel turned to Roxas, who, as well, seemed to be watching the world go by. "What do you want to know?" he asked. Depending on what it was, depended on his answer.
'Everything' was the obvious answer, but Roxas was going to start with the basics, the thing that had started this all; he summoned his Keyblade and turned to show it to Axel. "Okay, for starters... What is this Keyblade thing?"
"A Keyblade," Axel responded, deciding to add something else on to that sentance before Roxas really would take a swing at him. "... originally belonging to a hero of light... if he could be called that," he mused.
"Originally?" Roxas asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Well..." Axel wondered how best to phrase the statement. "... not really originally. He still has it. Just you have one too."
"Why do I have one? I'm not some 'hero of the light', for starters," Roxas had long since given up on the delusion that he was just a normal kid, but besides his acceptance of the Keyblade, to him, he was otherwise fairly normal.
"Connections," Axel said slowly, failing to elaborate on what kind of connections he was talking about. "To Sora."
"Sora?!" Roxas repeated in surprise. Though subconciously Roxas agreed with that - there was some kind of connection for Roxas to have the dreams, but Roxas was supressing it. "Why that guy?"
Axel folded his arms, his eyebrows raising in surprise that Roxas recognised the one name he seriously thought he would hold no response to what-so-ever. "You remember him?"
"...I've met him. Once," Roxas said evasively, though he would rather avoid mentioning the dreams.
Again, Axel seemed surprised. "I'd have thought he would have wanted to avoid your reunion at all costs," he guessed, rubbing the back of his neck. Perhaps he'd failed in some way? "But Sora... well, you're connected."
"What do you mean by 'reunion'?" Roxas asked sharply. There was probably no merit to be found in asking who 'he' was, however.
"You're connected to Sora," Axel repeated, waving his arms around lazily, as if bored.
"I told you to tell me everything," Roxas said, frowning. "Don't evade the question."
"It's true," Axel answered, his arms falling to a stop. He seriously doubted Roxas, at this point, would get the nitty-gritty details, and that was also classified information - which, Axel was not one for following rules, but, he wasn't one for having Roxas run off and do something stupid again.
"Fine," Roxas said, seeing it pointless to continue questioning him about it. "And what's so special about the Sora kid? He doesn't look like a hero," Roxas, of course, probably knew more about Sora than Axel did from his dreams, but he was interested in Axel's opinion on Sora.
"Sora is special," Axel speculated, remembering the time he had spent in Castle Oblivion as Sora journeyed through it, and thereafter. And all those reports on him back at headquarters - why file them if he wasn't important? "Sora kinda like... connects everyone. But he's connected to you the most."
"Everyone?" Roxas repeated, puzzled. "And why me the most, of all people?"
Axel looked thoughtful, wondering wheather to come out and tell him or just keep him guessing. "Well..." he started, flicking his wrists in mid air. "... it's rather complicated."
"Tell me anyway," Roxas scowled, his patience rapidly wearing thin. "You're still not answering any of my questions entirely."
Axel half laughed, as if mocking him, but grew silent relatively quickly. "You.... me as well, I suppose.... were never supposed to exist."
"Yeah, real funny," Roxas replied dryly, too tired by now of Axel's cryptic sentences to even bother trying to read into them. "I don't suppose you're gonna tell me what you mean by that, are you?"
Just to contradict what Roxas had just said, he walked right over to Roxas, leaning forward so he was right in front of his face. "We're nobodies."
Roxas couldn't figure out whether Axel was just insulting him, or if it was supposed to have some hidden meaning. Maybe Axel was just messing with him again. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Exactly what it sounds like," Axel said flatly. "You are a nobody."
"Are you making fun of me?!" Roxas said coldly, summoning his Keyblade again, although he didn't point it at Axel - yet. "'You're nobody', 'you're not supposed to exist', just what the heck do you mean?!"
Axel pointed at him, then pointed to his own chest. "No hearts." His fingers then dropped to his side, twitching slightly, slight flickers of fire growing around them, but being smouldered before they were visable. He wasn't going to summon his chakrams until Roxas lunged at him - if he did.
The hand that was not gripping his Keyblade went to his chest subconciously, as though to reassure himself that there was still a heartbeat there. Roxas couldn't fathom what Axel meant by that - if they didn't have hearts, wouldn't they just drop dead on the spot? He was silent for a while, until frustration at Axel turned to rage. "You're not making any sense!" he brandished his Keyblade, his voice rising to an angry shout. "I'm tired of your stupid mind games! If you won't tell me anything, we're both just wasting time!" Driven on suddenly by his anger, he darted fowards, slashing out at Axel's chest.
Without as much as flinching, Axel instantanously countered Roxas' sudden movement, both his chakrams appearing, dancing among the fire around them. The clash of metal was loud, and Axel pressed hard against them, to stop Roxas from sending him backwards by force. Leaning slightly lower, his voice dropped, turning to a whisper. "The Roxas I know has long gone..."
Roxas drew back then struck at the chakrams again and again as though hoping to batter down Axel's defences. But as much as he hated Axel at the moment, he didn't really want to fight him unless Axel struck back - he was just so full of pent-up rage at still being kept in the dark about just about everything, and he'd wanted to remove that big dumb grin from Axel's face.
Axel just stood there, his eyes softening to something between pity and empathy. He didn't want to fight Roxas - and even then, he seriously doubted wheather he would be able to. He continued to just hold his ground, his chakrams raised, blocking the blows thrown at him from all directions.
Roxas continued to hack at the chakrams even when he was panting and red in the face from exertion, but he gradually slowed until he sank to the ground in exhaustion and defeat. His Keyblade vanished again and he refused to allow Axel to see his face, instead staring at his now empty hands. He'd never asked for those stupid dreams, or that Keyblade thing, or to be caught up in so many other weird things involving himself. Did he really even want to know what Axel seemed to know about him? He had no idea. Overtaken by emotion before he could compose himself, he let out a half-sob, still staring determinedly at his hands. He looked pathetic, he knew, but right now he didn't give a damn who saw him.
During the hacking of his chakrams, Axel has closed his eyes, not wanting to see what was happening - but as silence fell and Roxas collapsed, he opened his eyes. And he just watched.
Was this what he had come back to do? To ruin his best friend's life? To make it hurt so bad?
No. He hadn't come back for that.
Axel continued to look on at Roxas, emotions that he wasn't supposed to have seeming to come back to him. Anger at himself. Sorrow. Pity. Empathy. Blinking a few times as he gazed down at Roxas, he said the only thing he could think of.
"I'm sorry."
Roxas didn't even notice that it was an odd thing for Axel of all people to apologise. Even if he did, he didn't trust himself to speak lest he lose whatever pride he had left by crying, which he absolutely refused to allow himself to do. Isn't Axel gonna hit back? After all that...? he thought, but didn't look up to see.
Axel stood there, opening his mouth, about to say something else, but closing it again. He wanted nothing more than to just sit down next to Roxas and tell him everything would be okay - he didn't much care if anyone cried or was upset, but Roxas... Roxas was special. He wanted to tell him nothing was wrong, that they were meant to exist, that Sora was just a normal person and nothing to do with him, but he couldn't. Axel knew he wouldn't be able to tell Roxas those lies.
A part of him wanted to leave Roxas there, because ,afterall, Rikku was nearby to take care of his troubles - and would probably make a much better effort of it. There was nothing left in Roxas' mind about him, afterall. But he couldn't even bring himself to flee.
Instead, he half heartedly laughed, though distinct sadness could be made through it. He had to finally accept it, then. "I guess... it's over."
Roxas ignored him, standing and roughly wiping his eyes with his arm. Plainly avoiding looking at Axel as if he weren't even there, he headed back to Rikku's house, in a mind to leave as soon as possible. He paused at the back door, however, and glanced back at Axel emotionlessly. "Don't start looking for me again. I don't want anything to do with you."
As if in role reversal, Axel looked like he would cry at that. It hurt to loose a friend. It hurt to be told you don't exist. He knew that. But he didn't know why, right now, he could... sort of... feel that.
"I can't... say that," he sad honestly. It was true. He missed Roxas when he hadn't been with the Organization so badly it was beyond obsession. He raised one hand, swirling it round several times before creating one of the dark portals he used to 'get around'. He looked back at Roxas one more time, debating if he should wait for a response.
Roxas' expression did not soften; on the contrary it was as stoic as Axel's had previously been, not even betraying surprise when Axel created a portal. "Fine," he said icily, "but next time I really will fight you if you follow me."
"I'll take your word for it, then," Axel forced a smile, momentarily looking like his usual self before quickly subduing back into his previous mood. He moved one step into the portal, his face and hair smothered with black edges, half invisible, before he turned back to Roxas for one final time.
"Sayonara."
And Axel vanished.
Where: Rikku's house. Ooo, creative.
When: 17th March, around about twilight.
Summary: Well, prequel to how the log came to be. Basically, Axel comes to New Sanctum looking for Roxas, and finds Rikku. Rikku of course, knows Roxas, and told Axel so, so brought him back with her to her place. A while later, Rikku mentions it to Roxas, and Roxas says he'll come visit. So Axel and Roxas reunite, but it's not the best reunion ever. Angst.
Notes: Title is kinda like a spin of of the phrase 'For Better or For Worse'. Axel's first appearance, so read, why don'tcha? And it's also Rikku's first log-appearance too XD; anyway, we all want to see how badly poor Axel takes his loves' friends' reaction to not knowing him. AND THE ANGST. D8
For a late afternoon in March, the weather was surprisingly warm. The sun was quickly descending towards the horizon, making Roxas’ shadow stretch beside him as he walked down Rikku’s street and casting the sky in fiery shades of golden, red and orange. But not even the beautiful sunset or the warm weather could improve Roxas’ mood; whoever this Axel person Rikku mentioned was, Roxas was starting to think coming to see him wasn’t such a good idea.
As always, however, his curiosity bested him and he rung Rikku’s doorbell before he could change his mind. Rikku had already told Axel she knew Roxas, and she had probably also told him Roxas would be coming. There wasn’t much point in turning back now.
As the doorbell rang, Rikku darted out from her workroom, almost knocking her poor Brother flying in the opposite direction who had - quite calmly - been about to open the door. Eying her suspiciously, Rikku replied to him with a swift nod, simply stating 'Friend.' With that, he left her alone, to return to whatever he had just previously been doing.
Opening the door, she smiled. "Hello, Roxas!" she said brightly, but with a little less enthusiam than usual.
“Hey, Rikku,” Roxas replied, glancing behind Rikku almost as if expecting Axel to be standing right behind her. Seeing he was not (not that Roxas even knew what he looked like, even if he was there), Roxas’ attention was back on Rikku. “You sound kinda… not as cheery as you normally are. Something up?”
Rikku sighed, but half laughed at the same time. "Oh, Axel," she said, her voice filling with dread. Axel, for the past day, had spent it literally bouncing off the walls, and only in the last half an hour had he taken to inhabiting Rikku's room, messing with her computer for some unknown reason. In truth, Axel was like a small puppy dog, that when it did not get attention it suffered from withdrawel symptoms. And Rikku was obviously, the one who had to give him the attention - being the fact she was the one who brought him home. "He's... tiring."
"He's that bad?" Roxas blinked. Rikku's energy normally seemed boundless, but if this guy could even wear the likes of Rikku down, Roxas probably really should've just left there and then, but instead he stepped inside and looked around. "So, um, where abouts is he?"
"In my room," she said slowly, glancing vaguely up the stairwell to the quiet corridor beyond. She wondered if really, inside her room, he was being quiet, or being as loud as ever. "He's just a very... well..." she shut the door behind Roxas. "... excited to see you?" she guessed.
Roxas frowned. "But I don't even know him. And what's so exciting about meeting me, anyway?" he shrugged it off, deciding he would find out soon enough, and as he didn't know which room was Rikku's he waited for her to lead the way.
Rikku shrugged. "Maybe he knows you but you don't know him," she suggested, though highly doubted the possibility. She looked around, and pointed to a randomly placed chair outside her workroom. "Wait here, I'll go and get him," she said. She doubted taking Roxas up there was a very good idea.
Inside Rikku's room, having decidedly made it his 'own' to a degree - most likely by the amount of sweet wrappers, drinks, and various other foods - was Axel, staring wide-eyed at the computer. His face was fixed, and for once, he seemed like a relatively calm individual, tactical and skilled. His red hair contrasted vividly with his green eyes, whilst vague remains of twilight hung in the air around him. At the sound of footsteps, he turned to his right, gazing at the door as Rikku opened it.
"Oh. It's you," he said bluntly, turning back to the computer, seemlingly wondering if they were going to have another session of 'Rikku-forcefully-dragging-Axel-out-of-her-room-but-failing'.
Rikku casually walked in, looking in distate at the mess Axel had managed to make in the space of half an hour. She looked back up at him, blinking. "I have something to tell you, you might be interested..."
"What?" Axel asked, spinning around on her chair to face her, still emotionless.
Rikku wrung her hands, wondering how best to phrase the fact 'Roxas was here.' "Well... Roxas is...downstairs...."
"Roxas?!" Axel said, immediately leaping up and running straight out of the room, sending Rikku reeling on the other side of the corridor, causing Brother to look in concern at him, and more than likely, Roxas probably heard him as well.
When Roxas heard his name mentioned by an unfamiliar voice, he went to the bottom of the stairs and looked up. He supposed this odd-looking person was Axel, but even seeing him didn't make Roxas any the wiser on just who he was. Eventually, he said uneasily, "...Axel?"
Axel stood there, looking down at Roxas, panting as if he'd run a marathon, wearas he'd only run a few metres. He breathed in and out, really unable to accept the fact he'd finally found Roxas after all this time. True, he didn't seem too like he had been before - different clothing and the like - but it was definately Roxas. He breathed a few more times, before managing to say, "So... you do remember me?"
Roxas blinked silently and raised an eyebrow, watching Axel for a moment. Was he suggesting that Roxas had met him beforehand at some point? Roxas didn't have many friends - or acquaintances, for that matter, so he remembered most people he'd met before. And he definitely did not know Axel. "Um, what? I don't think I've ever met you before."
"What...." Axel said slowly, looking momentarily confused, then he sighed, chuckling to himself with a hint of despair. So, he did mess with his memories. But still...
"You really sure?" he said, taking the stairs one at a time till he was a few from the bottom, leaning on the edge of the banister, looking back down at him.
"Sure I'm sure," Roxas said, rubbing the back of his head in embarassment. He was partly feeling bad because Axel looked so crestfallen, and partly uneasy just by Axel's mere presence, and when Axel began down the stairs Roxas backed away. "Do you know me, or something?"
"Course I do," Axel said, waving his hand in the air casually. "But you obviously don't... for some reason," he concluded, jumping down the last two steps, thoughtful. "What did he do to you, Roxas?"
Roxas' eyes narrowed, his hands balling into fists without him realising it. Was Axel trying to play mind games? Was this an elaborate joke from Rikku? Everything about Axel, from his cryptic speech to his unfathomable expression to his long black cloak, was suspicious. Tensely, he asked, "Who?"
"So, how long have you been here?" Axel asked, rapidly changing the subject - deliberately, or not deliberately, but his motive was clear that he was not going to tell Roxas who he was talking about.
"Been where?" he asked, his tone quickly changing to one of annoyance. Axel was making no sense, purposefully or not, and Roxas was finding it incredibly frustrating. No wonder Rikku was so worn-down. "If you mean Rikku's house, I just got here a few minutes ago."
Axel looked at him again, from where he had suddenly become massively interested in the carvings on the banister. Walking right up beside him with surprising agility, he half chuckled again. "No. Not right here. New Sanctum."
This time, Roxas didn't back away, instead staring directly at Axel as though trying to puzzle him out. "What sort of a question is that?"
One couldn't really say he returned Roxas' stare calmly, but Axel did indeed return it. "A question," he said bluntly, not moving much in paticular, but his gaze started wavering. "Darn, looks like I won't find out anything..."
Roxas' patience finally gave way, so he asked the question he'd wanted to ask all along. "Who are you?"
Axel broadly smiled. "Axel. A-X-E-L. Got it memorized?"
"Your name doesn't tell me who you are," Roxas pressed stubbornly with a scowl, but he doubted he'd get any more out of him.
"I'm nobody..." Axel started, wondering weather to continue taunting him or just stop and give in to the fact already that Roxas did not know who he was. "... you... know what I mean."
"No, but I know you're not making any sense," Roxas replied fiercely. "Who are you, how do you know me and what do you want with me? Give me a straight answer or don't give me one at all."
Axel placed his hands on his hips, cocking his head to one side. "You really don't remember," he said simply. He must have really messed him up, then. Nothing. Except the anger here, that is similar to how he was before.... he thought to himself, remaining silent for the interval.
Roxas merely glared at Axel and folded his arms, until the silence dragged on and Roxas had cooled his temper considerably. Time to try Axel at his own game. "If you're not gonna tell me anything, I might as well leave."
At that remark, Axel seemlingly came back to life, leaping forward and blocking the doorway. "No, you can't leave! I want to tell you, but... I can't... because..." he started, unable to stop himself. "...we're friends..."
Roxas was so taken aback at that, a surprised, "What?!" was all he could manage to say. This guy's enjoying messing with my head... Roxas thought silently, sitting on the second to bottom step of the stairs and massaging his temples. "...How can we be friends? I've never even met you before."
Albeit, Axel was never destined to answer that, as a loud, screaming, annoyed like voice came from upstairs. Decidedly thinking about making a run for it, he didn't get too far before a rather flushed Rikku appeared at the top of the stairs.
"AXEL!" she huffed, placing one hand on the wall beside her, then running down the stairs in blind rage. Whatever he'd done made her blatently miss the fact Roxas was there, tripping right into him and sending them both crashing to the floor at the bottom of the stairs - fortunately only a few centimetres away.
Roxas attempted to say 'ouch' but since Rikku had managed to land on his chest he was finding it difficult to breath, never mind speak. Fortunately, aside from most likely a few bruises he wasn't hurt, however. He shoved Rikku roughly off him and took a moment to regain his breath before directing at Rikku, "W-what the heck just happened?"
About to get up and taunt Axel a bit more, her plans were foiled when she was shoved off onto the floor, momentarily winding her. After a few seconds Rikku managed to bring herself back up, to hear Roxas' question. Looking betweem him and Axel, as if deciding which was the best fight, she turned to Roxas.
"He... he..." she say begrudingly, never actually getting around to tell Roxas exactly what Axel had done. "... and then I came here, and I didn't see you, and fell," she continued, perking up and speaking overly fast for the last setence.
Axel, however, as if in an attempt to taunt her just a tad more, placed himself on the seat Roxas had previously inhabited, settling himself to watch the display in front of him.
"...Okay," Roxas said, hoisting himself up to stand again and brushing himself off. After a sideways glance at Axel, he looked back at Rikku, pretending he hadn't as much as noticed him. "So, uh, what did Axel do?"
"He.... he..." she said, keeping her gaze fixed on the edge of the stairs, as if she as much as moved she'd explode. "KILLED my computer! There's a virus on my system! And when I fixed that he'd...." she gulped, clenching her fists. "He'd drawn stick figures of himself in all of the pictures of me and the family..."
Which, was something so idiotic that only Axel would do it.
Roxas couldn't help but laugh despite himself, but he was still determinedly ignoring Axel. "Guess that's what you get for letting strangers on your computer, huh?" he said, putting emphasis on the word 'strangers'.
"Maybe..." she said, not really amused that Roxas found the entire scenario humorous. "But... only.... idiots would do something like that..." she said, turning back to glare at Axel, who was putting on the most innocent face he could muster - as if he was now a completely different person.
Roxas stuffed his hands in his pockets and his smile faded as he finally looked back at Axel. He was tempted to ask just what Axel was doing on her computer to start with, but he doubted Axel would tell him. The most Roxas had managed to get out of Axel was an accidental outburst. "What was he doing on your computer anyway, Rikku?"
Rikku opened her mouth as if to say something, but ended up closing it again. "What... what were you doing?" she asked, her voice relatively even.
Axel blinked, surprised at being addressed. "Who, me? I was..." he pondered for an answer. "... I was... practicing my artwork, oh yes. Paint Shop Pro is a wonderful invention, you know that?" he said, all the more matter-of-fact-ly.
Roxas had no idea what Paint Shop Pro was, but he didn't need to know to realise Axel was most likely lying. "You have a lot of free time, don't you?" Roxas asked casually.
"Oooh, not really," Axel replied, rubbing his chin. "I've got... winding Rikku up... looking for you... being told you don't remember me... being chased by people... I'm quite booked," he nodded, counting off each article on his fingers.
"You were looking for me and being chased, but you have time to practise your artwork. Sure," Well, that confirmed that asking indirect questions got you more answers than direct ones. Roxas would have to keep that in mind.
Axel raised an eyebrow. "I told you, it was for winding Rikku up," he said, making to pat her on the head but being given the most evil glare possible, making his hand recoil last minute.
"Anyway," Rikku interrupted, her curiousity and general nosy-ness getting the better of her. "How do you guys know each other? HUH?"
"I don't know him," Roxas said hastily with a shrug before Axel could reply. "He says he knows me, but I've never met him before in my life. And he refuses to tell me anything other than that."
Axel jumped up, again running off to Roxas and looking like he was going to shake him, but deciding he would be better leaving that for the meantime. "But Roxas! We're... best friends!"
Roxas would have backed away yet again, but with Rikku also in the hall it was becoming rather cramped so he had to settle for an expression that plainly said, 'get the hell away from me, weirdo'. "I've never met you in my life, I've told you," Roxas repeated. "Unless you always decide to be best friends with total strangers, I don't think we are."
"But..." Axel said desperately, as if he reall was running out of ways to get through to Roxas without revealing anything. He was, however, cut short.
Rikku suddenly appeared on Roxas' right shoulder, her face set. "And besides, I'm Roxas' best friend, dude!"
Roxas definitely didn't see that coming. Roxas considered Rikku a friend, but a best friend? "Uh, sure," Roxas said, but he didn't sound very convinced. If it was going to change Axel's mind, he was willing to go along with it.
Rikku's face brightned at that, seemlingly oblivious to the very unsure tone he carried. "See?"
Axel looked from one to the other, and laughed. "Having fun with little friends, eh?" he commented emotionlessly. "But don't kid yourself. I'm his best friend."
"Assuming you were my best friend," Roxas began, his temper once again flaring, "you're not acting like one. You were looking for me, then when you met me, you refused to tell me a single thing even about yourself or why you're here."
Axel screwed his face up for a moment, putting on the most sympathetic voice he had in him. "I want to tell you, I just can't," he repeated. "You don't remember anything, it's way too dangerous..."
Rikku blinked, her face almost blank. "Hey, Roxas, do you think he knows something we don't?"
Roxas fixed Rikku with a look, then replied to Axel frustratedly, "You're doing it now! I can't ask you anything without you talking in riddles!"
"I'm not," Axel said, almost a little too calmly. He had and often did speak in worse riddles than this - this was plain obvious. "DiZ really did mess you up..." he said under his breath, before realising what he'd just said, covering his mouth but realizing it was already too late. "Ahhhh, shoot. What comes around comes around, I suppose."
Roxas' Keyblade was at Axel's throat before it could even fully appear. He didn't even care that Rikku was there any more in his anger. Roxas was certain Axel knew everything about... well, everything, all the questions he'd been bursting to ask the past few months. Although his voice was quiet, it quivered with rage. "Tell me everything," This time it wasn't a question, either, it was a command.
Axel's eyes moved to look downwards, spotting the keyblade - not Roxas' old, usual one, but a keyblade none the less. Perhaps he was not as helpless as he'd first thought. You still remember the old ways... he mused to himself. However, came the pressing arrangement of Roxas' quesiton. Answer it, or not?
"Perhaps," he said, never taking his eyes of the keyblade. He wasn't too worried about it - afterall he did have his chakrams - but he would rather not fight in his temporary lodgings. And he supposed Rikku wouldn't be too happy about it either. In fact, Rikku was being surprsingly quiet, just taking the whole scenario in. Having being distracted, his eyes wandered back to Roxas. ".... in part."
"Everything," Roxas glared, studying Axel's expression intently. "I'm tired of questions I don't know the answer to, I don't want any more."
"... fine," Axel eventually agreed, summing up the chances of Roxas actually killing him if he told him nothing. He'd find a way to skip some things later, he didn't need to know everything right now.
The Keyblade disappeared again and Roxas' hand dropped back to his side, but he continued to glare at Axel. If he wasn't so mistrusting of him, he'd ask that they spoke in private and away from Rikku, but Roxas had no idea what he'd try to pull if they were alone. "I suppose my only choice is to take your word that you will."
Axel nodded, partially smirking. "That you will."
Having remained perfectly silent till now, Rikku was rather - or not too much, but still - shocked at what was going on in front of her. And from her on in, things did not look like they were going to get much prettier. Creeping forward in case Roxas lunged out at her again, she tapped him on the shoulder. "Roxas..?"
Roxas flinched and jumped involuntarily, tearing his gaze reluctantly away from Axel and to Rikku. "What?!" he snapped. Realising he was taking his emotions out on Rikku, he attempted a smile, which looked more like a grimace than anything. "Sorry, what?"
Flinching slightly at his response, Rikku calmed herself down before she jumped backwards into the wall. "Do you..." she wrung her hands, looking at the floor, but eventually tearing her eyes away and back up at Roxas, her eyes serious. "... want me to... leave...?"
"I don't mind. You can leave if you want to," In reality, Roxas would have preferred if Rikku stayed, to restrain himself from kicking Axel into a bloody pulp until he spat out what Roxas wanted to know - and all of it. Right now, with Axel's big stupid smirk on his face, it was very tempting.
Rikku looked around, seemlingly trying to decide on the best course of action. As if realisation hit her face, she grabbed hold of Roxas' sleeve, and Axel's, proceeding to drag them through the interior of the house till she reached the back door, pushing them both through into a pretty open, but relatively small, yard area. "You can talk here..." she said simply. "I'll just sit by the door, and... if you want me... you know where I am."
"Fine," Roxas said, without looking at either Rikku or Axel. Striding into the middle of the yard and taking a breath of fresh air, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and was silent with his back to both of them, waiting for Axel to speak. He didn't trust at all that Axel would tell him everything, but what he didn't know he'd just have to try and find out for himself.
Nodding, Rikku looked at Axel, with a stare of 'you-mess-with-him-you-mess-with-me' qualities, and bounded off to the doorway, sitting herself down on the cold paved footpath, watching the world go by.
Upon her departure, Axel turned to Roxas, who, as well, seemed to be watching the world go by. "What do you want to know?" he asked. Depending on what it was, depended on his answer.
'Everything' was the obvious answer, but Roxas was going to start with the basics, the thing that had started this all; he summoned his Keyblade and turned to show it to Axel. "Okay, for starters... What is this Keyblade thing?"
"A Keyblade," Axel responded, deciding to add something else on to that sentance before Roxas really would take a swing at him. "... originally belonging to a hero of light... if he could be called that," he mused.
"Originally?" Roxas asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Well..." Axel wondered how best to phrase the statement. "... not really originally. He still has it. Just you have one too."
"Why do I have one? I'm not some 'hero of the light', for starters," Roxas had long since given up on the delusion that he was just a normal kid, but besides his acceptance of the Keyblade, to him, he was otherwise fairly normal.
"Connections," Axel said slowly, failing to elaborate on what kind of connections he was talking about. "To Sora."
"Sora?!" Roxas repeated in surprise. Though subconciously Roxas agreed with that - there was some kind of connection for Roxas to have the dreams, but Roxas was supressing it. "Why that guy?"
Axel folded his arms, his eyebrows raising in surprise that Roxas recognised the one name he seriously thought he would hold no response to what-so-ever. "You remember him?"
"...I've met him. Once," Roxas said evasively, though he would rather avoid mentioning the dreams.
Again, Axel seemed surprised. "I'd have thought he would have wanted to avoid your reunion at all costs," he guessed, rubbing the back of his neck. Perhaps he'd failed in some way? "But Sora... well, you're connected."
"What do you mean by 'reunion'?" Roxas asked sharply. There was probably no merit to be found in asking who 'he' was, however.
"You're connected to Sora," Axel repeated, waving his arms around lazily, as if bored.
"I told you to tell me everything," Roxas said, frowning. "Don't evade the question."
"It's true," Axel answered, his arms falling to a stop. He seriously doubted Roxas, at this point, would get the nitty-gritty details, and that was also classified information - which, Axel was not one for following rules, but, he wasn't one for having Roxas run off and do something stupid again.
"Fine," Roxas said, seeing it pointless to continue questioning him about it. "And what's so special about the Sora kid? He doesn't look like a hero," Roxas, of course, probably knew more about Sora than Axel did from his dreams, but he was interested in Axel's opinion on Sora.
"Sora is special," Axel speculated, remembering the time he had spent in Castle Oblivion as Sora journeyed through it, and thereafter. And all those reports on him back at headquarters - why file them if he wasn't important? "Sora kinda like... connects everyone. But he's connected to you the most."
"Everyone?" Roxas repeated, puzzled. "And why me the most, of all people?"
Axel looked thoughtful, wondering wheather to come out and tell him or just keep him guessing. "Well..." he started, flicking his wrists in mid air. "... it's rather complicated."
"Tell me anyway," Roxas scowled, his patience rapidly wearing thin. "You're still not answering any of my questions entirely."
Axel half laughed, as if mocking him, but grew silent relatively quickly. "You.... me as well, I suppose.... were never supposed to exist."
"Yeah, real funny," Roxas replied dryly, too tired by now of Axel's cryptic sentences to even bother trying to read into them. "I don't suppose you're gonna tell me what you mean by that, are you?"
Just to contradict what Roxas had just said, he walked right over to Roxas, leaning forward so he was right in front of his face. "We're nobodies."
Roxas couldn't figure out whether Axel was just insulting him, or if it was supposed to have some hidden meaning. Maybe Axel was just messing with him again. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Exactly what it sounds like," Axel said flatly. "You are a nobody."
"Are you making fun of me?!" Roxas said coldly, summoning his Keyblade again, although he didn't point it at Axel - yet. "'You're nobody', 'you're not supposed to exist', just what the heck do you mean?!"
Axel pointed at him, then pointed to his own chest. "No hearts." His fingers then dropped to his side, twitching slightly, slight flickers of fire growing around them, but being smouldered before they were visable. He wasn't going to summon his chakrams until Roxas lunged at him - if he did.
The hand that was not gripping his Keyblade went to his chest subconciously, as though to reassure himself that there was still a heartbeat there. Roxas couldn't fathom what Axel meant by that - if they didn't have hearts, wouldn't they just drop dead on the spot? He was silent for a while, until frustration at Axel turned to rage. "You're not making any sense!" he brandished his Keyblade, his voice rising to an angry shout. "I'm tired of your stupid mind games! If you won't tell me anything, we're both just wasting time!" Driven on suddenly by his anger, he darted fowards, slashing out at Axel's chest.
Without as much as flinching, Axel instantanously countered Roxas' sudden movement, both his chakrams appearing, dancing among the fire around them. The clash of metal was loud, and Axel pressed hard against them, to stop Roxas from sending him backwards by force. Leaning slightly lower, his voice dropped, turning to a whisper. "The Roxas I know has long gone..."
Roxas drew back then struck at the chakrams again and again as though hoping to batter down Axel's defences. But as much as he hated Axel at the moment, he didn't really want to fight him unless Axel struck back - he was just so full of pent-up rage at still being kept in the dark about just about everything, and he'd wanted to remove that big dumb grin from Axel's face.
Axel just stood there, his eyes softening to something between pity and empathy. He didn't want to fight Roxas - and even then, he seriously doubted wheather he would be able to. He continued to just hold his ground, his chakrams raised, blocking the blows thrown at him from all directions.
Roxas continued to hack at the chakrams even when he was panting and red in the face from exertion, but he gradually slowed until he sank to the ground in exhaustion and defeat. His Keyblade vanished again and he refused to allow Axel to see his face, instead staring at his now empty hands. He'd never asked for those stupid dreams, or that Keyblade thing, or to be caught up in so many other weird things involving himself. Did he really even want to know what Axel seemed to know about him? He had no idea. Overtaken by emotion before he could compose himself, he let out a half-sob, still staring determinedly at his hands. He looked pathetic, he knew, but right now he didn't give a damn who saw him.
During the hacking of his chakrams, Axel has closed his eyes, not wanting to see what was happening - but as silence fell and Roxas collapsed, he opened his eyes. And he just watched.
Was this what he had come back to do? To ruin his best friend's life? To make it hurt so bad?
No. He hadn't come back for that.
Axel continued to look on at Roxas, emotions that he wasn't supposed to have seeming to come back to him. Anger at himself. Sorrow. Pity. Empathy. Blinking a few times as he gazed down at Roxas, he said the only thing he could think of.
"I'm sorry."
Roxas didn't even notice that it was an odd thing for Axel of all people to apologise. Even if he did, he didn't trust himself to speak lest he lose whatever pride he had left by crying, which he absolutely refused to allow himself to do. Isn't Axel gonna hit back? After all that...? he thought, but didn't look up to see.
Axel stood there, opening his mouth, about to say something else, but closing it again. He wanted nothing more than to just sit down next to Roxas and tell him everything would be okay - he didn't much care if anyone cried or was upset, but Roxas... Roxas was special. He wanted to tell him nothing was wrong, that they were meant to exist, that Sora was just a normal person and nothing to do with him, but he couldn't. Axel knew he wouldn't be able to tell Roxas those lies.
A part of him wanted to leave Roxas there, because ,afterall, Rikku was nearby to take care of his troubles - and would probably make a much better effort of it. There was nothing left in Roxas' mind about him, afterall. But he couldn't even bring himself to flee.
Instead, he half heartedly laughed, though distinct sadness could be made through it. He had to finally accept it, then. "I guess... it's over."
Roxas ignored him, standing and roughly wiping his eyes with his arm. Plainly avoiding looking at Axel as if he weren't even there, he headed back to Rikku's house, in a mind to leave as soon as possible. He paused at the back door, however, and glanced back at Axel emotionlessly. "Don't start looking for me again. I don't want anything to do with you."
As if in role reversal, Axel looked like he would cry at that. It hurt to loose a friend. It hurt to be told you don't exist. He knew that. But he didn't know why, right now, he could... sort of... feel that.
"I can't... say that," he sad honestly. It was true. He missed Roxas when he hadn't been with the Organization so badly it was beyond obsession. He raised one hand, swirling it round several times before creating one of the dark portals he used to 'get around'. He looked back at Roxas one more time, debating if he should wait for a response.
Roxas' expression did not soften; on the contrary it was as stoic as Axel's had previously been, not even betraying surprise when Axel created a portal. "Fine," he said icily, "but next time I really will fight you if you follow me."
"I'll take your word for it, then," Axel forced a smile, momentarily looking like his usual self before quickly subduing back into his previous mood. He moved one step into the portal, his face and hair smothered with black edges, half invisible, before he turned back to Roxas for one final time.
"Sayonara."
And Axel vanished.