As I Sit Here At The Crossroads Of My Life, I Make The Choice

[nevermore11]

She left me once again. This time it's for good. Crystal ended things with me out of the blue tuesday night. I, naturally, became very ill and very upset. I fell into my own abyss of loathing and despair. I popped pill after pill and drank 3/4 of a bottle of nyquil. I totalled around 10-12 pills after it was all said and done. Then, I did

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There is still hope, my friend.

[wildaugust]

But to have hope you must have faith, and to have faith you must have trust. Yet trust is not something easily come by.

Remember what we talked about so long ago? Of all the ways of dealing with this seemingly hopeless situation (the drinking, cutting, etc.) there is only one sure way of overcoming every ounce of grief, pain, and confusion. You touched on it for merely a sentence, but that sentence alone shows how close you are to the cusp of knowing Him.

God please help me.

Only God can take away all of our sorrow. Friends, family, and therapy may help, but they are not the final solution. He heals. He comforts. He provides. He protects. And He will alone will judge. Whatever she does with her life is no longer your concern, as much as it may hurt and as much as you may still love her. You must choose to love yourself more, to start reclaiming your own life and doing what is best for you and Jesus is certainly waiting for you to do what you've already begun: Turn to Him. Ask Him for help. Give every burden you have to God so that you no longer have to deal with it. Whatever you do, don't lose sight of God. Just consider it.

Until then, Andrew and I want to come visit sometime, so let either of us know when you'll have a few days off. We're more than willing to be there for you. Love you, bro.