Belonging: Chapter Twenty Three
Author's Note: Okay, I've been very busy this week in the run up to Christmas, and haven't been able to write as much as I would have liked. So I guess finishing this baby before Christmas was a bit of a pipedream… but at least it gives you all something to look forward to in the New Year ;)
And… I might have indulged in a quite a bit of fluff in this chapter. Not to mention all the smut. Sorry about that.
Remember this chapter is still taking place on the same night ast the last one. For those of you worried about Mr Jones… don't worry. The next chapter will allay your fears. :)
Title: Belonging - Chapter Twenty Three
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Characters Jack/Ten
Rating: This Chapter - NC-17 for explicit sex and language
Spoilers: The Stolen Earth, Journey's End
Disclaimer: The BBC own it all, the little tinkers
Warnings: m/m slash | hurt/comfort
Description:
Set immediately after the events of The Stolen Earth/Journey's End.
The Torchwood team members are struggling to get back to normal after recent shattering events, when the Doctor turns up in the Torchwood Hub in the middle of the night; alone, heartbroken, guilt-ridden, and needing somewhere to belong.
"I've been selfish, I know. I've been neglecting you. I haven't been giving you what you need..."
Chapter Twenty Three
The water running from the shower above me was good and hot. I tipped my head forwards and let it run directly onto my scalp and down past my face. The shower cubicle we were both standing in was big enough for a few people, and was encased in opaque Perspex.
The Doctor was next to me under his own showerhead. I turned my head to look at him and saw that he was standing in a similar position, letting the water run down his hair and face. He looked kind of strange with his hair plastered down like that, but no less attractive.
I looked away. I'd taken his suggestion to join him in the shower as some sort of sexual invitation, but he never seemed to act the way I expected. Maybe he'd just literally meant he was going to take a shower. I sure as hell wasn't going to act all disappointed about it. I'd made a big enough fool of myself that night already.
Water went in my eyes and I closed them for a moment, breathing out slowly through my nose.
Then I felt it. The gentle touch of a hand running over my shoulder. A second later, I felt the presence of another body behind me. I didn't move or say anything, but moved my head almost imperceptivity so that I could open my eyes without them filling with water. I saw a long, pale arm reach out to my side and take a bottle of shower gel from the little soap shelf between the two showers. A second later, I gasped a little as the cold gel touched my back. The Doctor's hands ran smoothly over my flesh and the soap quickly warmed against my skin as he washed me carefully and tenderly.
"Do you mind me doing this?" he murmured after a moment.
I shook my head. "No. It's… lovely. But you don't have to."
"I want to," he said quietly. "I should do things like this for you more often."
"There's no need," I insisted.
"Yes," he said firmly. "There is. I'm as guilty of taking you for granted as… well, never mind that, now. I owe you so much."
"You owe me nothing," I said quietly. I would have turned around to look at him as I spoke, but his hands rubbing gently at my back and shoulders felt so damn good.
After a moment I realised it was useless to resist, and let him do whatever he wanted. It felt a little strange, I'm not used to being fussed over, but it was kind of nice, if I'm honest.
The hands that had been gently spreading the soap over my back and shoulders now began to run firmly down my sides and over my hips and buttocks. I took a sharp breath as I felt the heat of the Doctor's mouth on the back of my neck and the muscles of my shoulders, his tongue dragging over the skin.
He'd touched me all over before, but had only skimmed his hands over my body somewhat guardedly; he'd never kissed me anywhere other than on my lips, face or neck, and he'd certainly never done anything like this before. I wasn't prepared for what it would do to me.
A second later, I felt his hands slide smoothly across my chest and stomach, meeting in the middle and then crossing as he embraced me from behind. He held me tightly; I felt his chin push into my shoulder, his hot breath against my cheek as he nuzzled my face lovingly. I covered his arms with mine, squeezing him back, and leaned back into him, closing my eyes. I'm not sure why, but hot tears, hotter than the shower water, ran down my face.
I felt the Doctor's arms hold me even tighter, squeezing, and his mouth trailed soft kisses over my salt-streaked cheeks.
Neither of us spoke a word. We didn't have to.
We'd stood like that for a long moment, just holding each other, speaking without words. All the doubts and insecurities we'd ever had about our relationship were discarded, the apologies and the forgiveness we both felt we needed to give and ask for were exchanged wordlessly.
All we had left was each other, and our love, and the knowledge that it would never end until the Doctor regenerated. And even then… I was never going to let him go that easily.
Yes, the Doctor was leaving the Hub in no more than a couple of weeks, and we knew we had to make the most of what we had together in the time we had left, but it was okay.
We belonged to each other, and nothing else mattered.
***
After a while, I felt the Doctor shifting behind me, the arms sliding away from my torso. I felt cold and empty at the sudden loss of his touch.
The next moment though, I heard a click and the squeak of a plastic bottle being squeezed.
A fresh handful of shower gel was smeared over my body from behind, and the Doctor's hands continued to wash me. I felt him pull me sideways a step or two so that I was standing between the two showerheads. I was still being sprayed slightly from both sides, but the water wasn't enough to wash away the suds too quickly.
He washed my hair, his long fingers massaging my scalp. Then his hands rubbed languorously over my chest and stomach, arms and legs. He pulled me back under the water to rinse me off, and when the last of the suds had disappeared down the plughole (where did the water go, I idly wondered), he pushed me back between the two showerheads and began knead my back soothingly. My intense arousal of earlier had waned slightly during our more tender interlude, but now it fired up inside me afresh.
I felt the Doctor's breath on my neck again. "I've spent so much energy concentrating on our psychic connection, so much effort healing myself. I've been selfish, I know. I've been neglecting you. I haven't been giving you what you need..." he murmured, close to my ear. He was pressing right up against me. His usually cool flesh was warmed by the hot water, but it still made me shiver.
I leaned forward, water dripping down my face. I stood with my palms flat against the cold tiles of the shower interior and yielded to his touch. The Doctor's fingers tickled experimentally at the points above my hips, but I didn't have the same sensitive nerve endings there as he did.
You'll have to try harder than that, I thought, with a hint of amusement.
His hands left me again, momentarily, and I heard the squeeze-and-squirt sound of the Doctor filling his palm with more liquid soap.
With a shock of pleasure, I felt the Doctor's hand curl round my body and head straight for my groin, as he began to soap my genitals with firm but gentle movements. I gasped and let my head fall forward, pressing my forehead against the cold tiles. His left hand soothed at my hip and buttocks while his right hand alternatively massaged my balls and then stroked my shaft in a slick, firm rhythm. The added lubrication of the liquid soap was making the sensation so very intense… I didn't know how long I could hold back.
"Doctor… oh… God…" I gasped. I wanted to tell him to slow down, I didn't want to climax this quickly, but Christ, it felt so good.
I felt him slow down, stop and squeeze me firmly, and then both his hands left me. I groaned, panting hard.
I was still reeling from that when the Doctor took my shoulders and pushed me back under one of the showerheads, holding me under until the suds had been rinsed away.
Afterwards, he left me standing under the water, panting. I was desperate for him to touch me again; I'd been so close to orgasm…
The next minute I yelped as the water started running freezing cold. I leapt out of the way, turned around and stared, shocked, at the Doctor. He was standing looking at me, his hand still on the temperature controls, with a smirk on his face.
"Thought you needed cooling down," he drawled. He turned off the water completely and wrapped his arms around my shivering torso. He leaned into my neck. "Sorry, Captain. But I haven't finished with you yet."
I stared dumbly at him as he let me go, opened the shower door and stepped out. A moment later he was wrapping a thick, fluffy white towel around me and rubbing me all over with it. I tried to grasp hold of the towel in an attempt to dry myself, but he wouldn't let me, shushing me almost impatiently.
When I was more or less dry, the Doctor left the towel around my shoulders to keep me warm while he dried himself off. I watched as he rubbed his body vigorously with the towel, then applied the same frantic treatment to his dripping wet hair. When he'd finished, his hair was a halo of damp, fluffy spikes, and this time I didn't hold back from reaching out and running my fingers through it.
"Mmm... sexy," I murmured, as I finished tousling it. He grinned, and kissed me, pressing his body against mine.
The cold water had done what he'd intended it to do and had certainly distracted me from my earlier high state of arousal, but now the sensation of his lips on mine went straight to my loins, and I felt the fire there suddenly relight. I gripped him tightly to me.
And then, once again, he broke the kiss and stepped away. I stopped myself from groaning out loud.
He grinned cheekily at me, pulled the towel off my shoulders, and then took my hand and led me out of the bathroom and down the corridor.
A moment later we were in his bedroom. The lights were dimmed, and the sensual aroma of whatever-it-was, was strong and heady. I wasn't sure if the Doctor had engineered it, or if the TARDIS was trying to up the romantic mood on his behalf.
He closed the door behind me, and pushed me in front of him. "Get on the bed," he said. I stared at him for a second. I was torn, for a second. Did I follow his commands, blindly? Like I always had? I wasn't used to being submissive when it came to sex, but somehow, this was kind of exciting.
He must have sensed my ambivalence, because he stepped forward and ran his hands softly down my arms.
"Jack... you helped me. And now... I just want to make you happy." I opened my mouth to reply, but he pressed his fingers against my lips before I could speak.
"I've spent all this time watching... well, those videos... and... watching what you do to me. How else could I learn what to do? Please... let me put all that hard-learned theory into practice..."
He used that voice of his, the one that would make me march into Hell for him without so much as a fire extinguisher.
He leaned into my neck to speak, whispered like he was confessing. "I've never wanted you like this before. So... aggressively..." he looked a little confused.
I smiled knowingly. "It's because we had a fight, sweetheart. This is what we humans call 'making up sex'."
He nodded cautiously.
"It's okay now and then. It's exciting..." I reached out and felt for his hearts. They were hammering in his chest. He swallowed and nodded resolutely.
I could hardly resist him, then, could I? I wordlessly crawled backwards onto the bed. I was just about dry now, except for my hair still being a bit damp. My skin felt just-washed smooth and tingly against the silk sheets. The Doctor followed me, his long limbs supporting him either side of me, and he used his mouth on my body for the first time, trailing kisses and dragging his lips and tongue all over my skin. His hands pressed, and stroked, and pinched in all the right places, and I completely surrendered to his touch.
Every time I reached for him, he pushed my hands away as though to silently warn me that he was in charge this time. I settled for gently grabbing handfuls of his hair and flesh whenever I could, almost as a way to anchor myself to him.
Christ, but he was good. Naturally good. Either that or I'm an extremely proficient teacher without even knowing it.
He slowly kissed, licked and bit down my body, making me moan, twitch and shudder beneath him. When his impossibly hot mouth finally surrounded my erection, I think I might have started babbling something, but for the first time, I can't remember what I said. It was probably incomprehensible, anyway.
Oh, but as wonderful as it was... there was something missing. Our psychic connection. The Doctor seemed determined to do this the human way, but I suddenly realised that I needed to feel him in my head and in my heart. I craved it.
I reached out for him desperately, keening, pressing my fingers against his head in whatever way I could, looking for his light in the darkness of my mind.
He released me from his mouth, his lips shining, his face flushed. I was making soft pleading noises.
He crawled back up my body and straddled me, his slight weight pushing me into the mattress. He pressed his hardness against mine, rubbing against me, and I cried out.
"What do you want?" He murmured gently. "Tell me what you want, Jack."
"I want you... inside my mind. I want you in my heart. I want you..." I swallowed. I knew what I wanted. "I want you inside me."
The Doctor's eyes were wide. Somehow, this time, he knew exactly what I meant.
It only needed a brief brush of his fingertips against my temple to connect us this time. And this time... the fire inside me was different, somehow. It filled my entire body with warmth, not just a flare of heat that moved around me like a fluttering creature, but a deep, encompassing throb of energy that made everything red when I closed my eyes, not pink-tinged white like before. It filled my entire body, right to the tips of my toes and my fingers, and it was behind my eyes and filling up my belly and it was...
It was love.
I somehow managed to move my arm and fumbled under the pillow beside me, where I now kept something. I reached for the half-empty tube and handed it to the Doctor wordlessly.
He nodded, his face flushed, his eyes dark and heavy-lidded. "Is this really what you want?"
I nodded, and laid back onto the bed.
The Doctor settled himself next to me, on my right hand side, leaning on his elbow as he pulled off the cap and liberally slicked the fingers of his right hand with clear jelly.
I took the tube from him and held it in my hand as he bent his head and kissed me tenderly, his arm reaching down between my spread thighs and gently probing. I gasped softly when I first felt the pressure of his index finger, but I leant into the kiss; sent calm thoughts of encouragement directly into his mind. I was getting better at this now, and I then sent some very explicit thoughts to him, to see how he'd react. I felt him smile against my lips, probing deeper into me with his fingers.
It had been a good number of months since Ianto had topped me, and there was a little pain, but I couldn't have cared less. I breathed deeply through my nose, concentrated on the sensation of the Doctor's tongue in my mouth, his fingers in my body, and tried to relax as much as I could.
I squeezed a little lube on to my fingers and discarded the tube, and then slicked the Doctor's erection with clear jelly, stroking him at the same time, feeling him shudder against me.
After a few moments, I ran my fingers tenderly over the Doctor's face, pushing at him gently to break his kiss.
"I'm ready now," I said, almost shyly.
The look on the Doctor's face was a mixture of lust, apprehension and tenderness as he withdrew his fingers.
"Like this," I murmured, as I turned my body away from him until I was face down on the bed, and took a pillow into my arms to lean against. The Doctor looked a little surprised, I'd taken him face to face every time so far, but this was how I preferred this particular arrangement. Not that it happened very often. There weren't many men I'd trusted enough to give myself to like this.
He slid inside me fairly easily; he'd worked me well with his fingers beforehand, and I was desperate for him.
I pushed backwards against him, enjoying the sensation of being filled, gasping as he began to move against me. He grazed deliciously against my prostate with every push, and our psychic energy pulsed inside me, making me dizzy with sparks of pleasure.
I braced myself, flexing my legs to raise myself off the bed, and almost naturally, I felt the Doctor's arm slip around to my front and his long fingers begin to feel for me, grasping my shaft firmly and beginning to stroke in tandem with his thrusts.
"Oh... fuck..." I gasped against the pillow as I felt the Doctor's hot mouth on my shoulder, his teeth sinking gently into my flesh. We were one person again. He was inside me. Inside my body. His hands were touching me, stroking me. I could feel his mind and soul entwining with mine. Heard his ragged breathing in my ear. Nothing else in the universe existed.
The electric heat settled in my groin again, and I closed my eyes, concentrated on it, felt it grow inside me. Before very long I felt myself begin to climax and somehow this time I was consciousy able to push the energy back into the Doctor. I yelled into the pillow as I came, and dimly realised the Doctor wasn't far behind, felt him gripping me painfully tight, his teeth leaving marks on my skin as he emptied himself into me with a howl.
The sensations we shared with each other simultaneously left me shaking and drained, moaning and shuddering as the dual aftershocks racked through my body, the weight of the Doctor against my back pushing me pleasantly into the soft mattress.
After a moment I felt him leave my body, and I whimpered at the loss. Then I felt him tugging at me, turning me over on the bed towards him, pulling me into his arms.
There was no aloofness this time, no distance between us.
I could hardly move, but I let the Doctor cradle me as he lay back on the bed and pulled me half on top of him, wrapping himself around me, and covering my face with kisses. I sighed contentedly and nestled against him.
I wanted to say 'thank you', but I didn't have the energy to speak. Instead I used the lingering mental connection between us to press the words into his mind, and I felt him squeeze my shoulders to let me know he'd heard.
After a while, I found the strength to speak.
"Doctor…" I mumbled.
"Yes, sweetheart?" he murmured. I smiled. He was mimicking my term of endearment. He'd never called me that before. I'm not sure he ever would again. But it felt right, at that moment.
"When you leave… if anything happens to you. If you regenerate…"
"Hmm?" His fingers wound gently into my hair.
"You'll come back, won't you? To see us, I mean. As soon as you can. Please. Promise me. Swear to me."
"So you can decide whether you still fancy me or not?" I could hear the smile in his voice.
I shook my head slightly. "No, silly. So we can reconnect the bond."
"What if I turn really ugly?"
"I don't care if you regenerate into Quasimodo's less attractive brother. I love you, not what you look like."
"Are you saying I'm not handsome?" He muttered. I grinned. He'd said that before, in his last body, if I remembered correctly.
"Yeah, okay. You're hot. I admit it. I'm not saying it doesn't help," I said, a little cheekily. He heard him chuckle softly.
I squeezed him. "Seriously. I mean it. This is forever. Swear to me."
"I swear," he said solemnly. And I believed him.
The sensation of the Doctor's arms around me, his fingers stroking softly at my still-damp hair, was all I felt, all I wanted to feel, as I drifted off to sleep.
I don't know why I don't sleep very often. Maybe that lifeforce inside me gives me so much energy that I tire less easily than mortal men. All I know is, whenever I go to sleep... I wake up wishing I hadn't.
To be continued
<< Chapter One
<< Chapter Two
<< Chapter Three
<< Chapter Four
<< Chapter Five
<< Chapter Six
<< Chapter Seven
<< Chapter Eight
<< Chapter Nine
<< Chapter Ten
<< Chapter Eleven
<< Chapter Twelve
<< Chapter Thirteen
<< Chapter Fourteen
<< Chapter Fifteen
<< Chapter Sixteen
<< Chapter Seventeen
<< Chapter Eighteen
<< Chapter Nineteen
<< Chapter Twenty
>> Chapter Twenty One
>> Chapter Twenty Two
>> Chapter Twenty Four
>> Chapter Twenty Five
>> Chapter Twenty Six
>> Chapter Twenty Seven
>> Chapter Twenty Eight
And… I might have indulged in a quite a bit of fluff in this chapter. Not to mention all the smut. Sorry about that.
Remember this chapter is still taking place on the same night ast the last one. For those of you worried about Mr Jones… don't worry. The next chapter will allay your fears. :)
Title: Belonging - Chapter Twenty Three
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Characters Jack/Ten
Rating: This Chapter - NC-17 for explicit sex and language
Spoilers: The Stolen Earth, Journey's End
Disclaimer: The BBC own it all, the little tinkers
Warnings: m/m slash | hurt/comfort
Description:
Set immediately after the events of The Stolen Earth/Journey's End.
The Torchwood team members are struggling to get back to normal after recent shattering events, when the Doctor turns up in the Torchwood Hub in the middle of the night; alone, heartbroken, guilt-ridden, and needing somewhere to belong.
"I've been selfish, I know. I've been neglecting you. I haven't been giving you what you need..."
Chapter Twenty Three
The water running from the shower above me was good and hot. I tipped my head forwards and let it run directly onto my scalp and down past my face. The shower cubicle we were both standing in was big enough for a few people, and was encased in opaque Perspex.
The Doctor was next to me under his own showerhead. I turned my head to look at him and saw that he was standing in a similar position, letting the water run down his hair and face. He looked kind of strange with his hair plastered down like that, but no less attractive.
I looked away. I'd taken his suggestion to join him in the shower as some sort of sexual invitation, but he never seemed to act the way I expected. Maybe he'd just literally meant he was going to take a shower. I sure as hell wasn't going to act all disappointed about it. I'd made a big enough fool of myself that night already.
Water went in my eyes and I closed them for a moment, breathing out slowly through my nose.
Then I felt it. The gentle touch of a hand running over my shoulder. A second later, I felt the presence of another body behind me. I didn't move or say anything, but moved my head almost imperceptivity so that I could open my eyes without them filling with water. I saw a long, pale arm reach out to my side and take a bottle of shower gel from the little soap shelf between the two showers. A second later, I gasped a little as the cold gel touched my back. The Doctor's hands ran smoothly over my flesh and the soap quickly warmed against my skin as he washed me carefully and tenderly.
"Do you mind me doing this?" he murmured after a moment.
I shook my head. "No. It's… lovely. But you don't have to."
"I want to," he said quietly. "I should do things like this for you more often."
"There's no need," I insisted.
"Yes," he said firmly. "There is. I'm as guilty of taking you for granted as… well, never mind that, now. I owe you so much."
"You owe me nothing," I said quietly. I would have turned around to look at him as I spoke, but his hands rubbing gently at my back and shoulders felt so damn good.
After a moment I realised it was useless to resist, and let him do whatever he wanted. It felt a little strange, I'm not used to being fussed over, but it was kind of nice, if I'm honest.
The hands that had been gently spreading the soap over my back and shoulders now began to run firmly down my sides and over my hips and buttocks. I took a sharp breath as I felt the heat of the Doctor's mouth on the back of my neck and the muscles of my shoulders, his tongue dragging over the skin.
He'd touched me all over before, but had only skimmed his hands over my body somewhat guardedly; he'd never kissed me anywhere other than on my lips, face or neck, and he'd certainly never done anything like this before. I wasn't prepared for what it would do to me.
A second later, I felt his hands slide smoothly across my chest and stomach, meeting in the middle and then crossing as he embraced me from behind. He held me tightly; I felt his chin push into my shoulder, his hot breath against my cheek as he nuzzled my face lovingly. I covered his arms with mine, squeezing him back, and leaned back into him, closing my eyes. I'm not sure why, but hot tears, hotter than the shower water, ran down my face.
I felt the Doctor's arms hold me even tighter, squeezing, and his mouth trailed soft kisses over my salt-streaked cheeks.
Neither of us spoke a word. We didn't have to.
We'd stood like that for a long moment, just holding each other, speaking without words. All the doubts and insecurities we'd ever had about our relationship were discarded, the apologies and the forgiveness we both felt we needed to give and ask for were exchanged wordlessly.
All we had left was each other, and our love, and the knowledge that it would never end until the Doctor regenerated. And even then… I was never going to let him go that easily.
Yes, the Doctor was leaving the Hub in no more than a couple of weeks, and we knew we had to make the most of what we had together in the time we had left, but it was okay.
We belonged to each other, and nothing else mattered.
***
After a while, I felt the Doctor shifting behind me, the arms sliding away from my torso. I felt cold and empty at the sudden loss of his touch.
The next moment though, I heard a click and the squeak of a plastic bottle being squeezed.
A fresh handful of shower gel was smeared over my body from behind, and the Doctor's hands continued to wash me. I felt him pull me sideways a step or two so that I was standing between the two showerheads. I was still being sprayed slightly from both sides, but the water wasn't enough to wash away the suds too quickly.
He washed my hair, his long fingers massaging my scalp. Then his hands rubbed languorously over my chest and stomach, arms and legs. He pulled me back under the water to rinse me off, and when the last of the suds had disappeared down the plughole (where did the water go, I idly wondered), he pushed me back between the two showerheads and began knead my back soothingly. My intense arousal of earlier had waned slightly during our more tender interlude, but now it fired up inside me afresh.
I felt the Doctor's breath on my neck again. "I've spent so much energy concentrating on our psychic connection, so much effort healing myself. I've been selfish, I know. I've been neglecting you. I haven't been giving you what you need..." he murmured, close to my ear. He was pressing right up against me. His usually cool flesh was warmed by the hot water, but it still made me shiver.
I leaned forward, water dripping down my face. I stood with my palms flat against the cold tiles of the shower interior and yielded to his touch. The Doctor's fingers tickled experimentally at the points above my hips, but I didn't have the same sensitive nerve endings there as he did.
You'll have to try harder than that, I thought, with a hint of amusement.
His hands left me again, momentarily, and I heard the squeeze-and-squirt sound of the Doctor filling his palm with more liquid soap.
With a shock of pleasure, I felt the Doctor's hand curl round my body and head straight for my groin, as he began to soap my genitals with firm but gentle movements. I gasped and let my head fall forward, pressing my forehead against the cold tiles. His left hand soothed at my hip and buttocks while his right hand alternatively massaged my balls and then stroked my shaft in a slick, firm rhythm. The added lubrication of the liquid soap was making the sensation so very intense… I didn't know how long I could hold back.
"Doctor… oh… God…" I gasped. I wanted to tell him to slow down, I didn't want to climax this quickly, but Christ, it felt so good.
I felt him slow down, stop and squeeze me firmly, and then both his hands left me. I groaned, panting hard.
I was still reeling from that when the Doctor took my shoulders and pushed me back under one of the showerheads, holding me under until the suds had been rinsed away.
Afterwards, he left me standing under the water, panting. I was desperate for him to touch me again; I'd been so close to orgasm…
The next minute I yelped as the water started running freezing cold. I leapt out of the way, turned around and stared, shocked, at the Doctor. He was standing looking at me, his hand still on the temperature controls, with a smirk on his face.
"Thought you needed cooling down," he drawled. He turned off the water completely and wrapped his arms around my shivering torso. He leaned into my neck. "Sorry, Captain. But I haven't finished with you yet."
I stared dumbly at him as he let me go, opened the shower door and stepped out. A moment later he was wrapping a thick, fluffy white towel around me and rubbing me all over with it. I tried to grasp hold of the towel in an attempt to dry myself, but he wouldn't let me, shushing me almost impatiently.
When I was more or less dry, the Doctor left the towel around my shoulders to keep me warm while he dried himself off. I watched as he rubbed his body vigorously with the towel, then applied the same frantic treatment to his dripping wet hair. When he'd finished, his hair was a halo of damp, fluffy spikes, and this time I didn't hold back from reaching out and running my fingers through it.
"Mmm... sexy," I murmured, as I finished tousling it. He grinned, and kissed me, pressing his body against mine.
The cold water had done what he'd intended it to do and had certainly distracted me from my earlier high state of arousal, but now the sensation of his lips on mine went straight to my loins, and I felt the fire there suddenly relight. I gripped him tightly to me.
And then, once again, he broke the kiss and stepped away. I stopped myself from groaning out loud.
He grinned cheekily at me, pulled the towel off my shoulders, and then took my hand and led me out of the bathroom and down the corridor.
A moment later we were in his bedroom. The lights were dimmed, and the sensual aroma of whatever-it-was, was strong and heady. I wasn't sure if the Doctor had engineered it, or if the TARDIS was trying to up the romantic mood on his behalf.
He closed the door behind me, and pushed me in front of him. "Get on the bed," he said. I stared at him for a second. I was torn, for a second. Did I follow his commands, blindly? Like I always had? I wasn't used to being submissive when it came to sex, but somehow, this was kind of exciting.
He must have sensed my ambivalence, because he stepped forward and ran his hands softly down my arms.
"Jack... you helped me. And now... I just want to make you happy." I opened my mouth to reply, but he pressed his fingers against my lips before I could speak.
"I've spent all this time watching... well, those videos... and... watching what you do to me. How else could I learn what to do? Please... let me put all that hard-learned theory into practice..."
He used that voice of his, the one that would make me march into Hell for him without so much as a fire extinguisher.
He leaned into my neck to speak, whispered like he was confessing. "I've never wanted you like this before. So... aggressively..." he looked a little confused.
I smiled knowingly. "It's because we had a fight, sweetheart. This is what we humans call 'making up sex'."
He nodded cautiously.
"It's okay now and then. It's exciting..." I reached out and felt for his hearts. They were hammering in his chest. He swallowed and nodded resolutely.
I could hardly resist him, then, could I? I wordlessly crawled backwards onto the bed. I was just about dry now, except for my hair still being a bit damp. My skin felt just-washed smooth and tingly against the silk sheets. The Doctor followed me, his long limbs supporting him either side of me, and he used his mouth on my body for the first time, trailing kisses and dragging his lips and tongue all over my skin. His hands pressed, and stroked, and pinched in all the right places, and I completely surrendered to his touch.
Every time I reached for him, he pushed my hands away as though to silently warn me that he was in charge this time. I settled for gently grabbing handfuls of his hair and flesh whenever I could, almost as a way to anchor myself to him.
Christ, but he was good. Naturally good. Either that or I'm an extremely proficient teacher without even knowing it.
He slowly kissed, licked and bit down my body, making me moan, twitch and shudder beneath him. When his impossibly hot mouth finally surrounded my erection, I think I might have started babbling something, but for the first time, I can't remember what I said. It was probably incomprehensible, anyway.
Oh, but as wonderful as it was... there was something missing. Our psychic connection. The Doctor seemed determined to do this the human way, but I suddenly realised that I needed to feel him in my head and in my heart. I craved it.
I reached out for him desperately, keening, pressing my fingers against his head in whatever way I could, looking for his light in the darkness of my mind.
He released me from his mouth, his lips shining, his face flushed. I was making soft pleading noises.
He crawled back up my body and straddled me, his slight weight pushing me into the mattress. He pressed his hardness against mine, rubbing against me, and I cried out.
"What do you want?" He murmured gently. "Tell me what you want, Jack."
"I want you... inside my mind. I want you in my heart. I want you..." I swallowed. I knew what I wanted. "I want you inside me."
The Doctor's eyes were wide. Somehow, this time, he knew exactly what I meant.
It only needed a brief brush of his fingertips against my temple to connect us this time. And this time... the fire inside me was different, somehow. It filled my entire body with warmth, not just a flare of heat that moved around me like a fluttering creature, but a deep, encompassing throb of energy that made everything red when I closed my eyes, not pink-tinged white like before. It filled my entire body, right to the tips of my toes and my fingers, and it was behind my eyes and filling up my belly and it was...
It was love.
I somehow managed to move my arm and fumbled under the pillow beside me, where I now kept something. I reached for the half-empty tube and handed it to the Doctor wordlessly.
He nodded, his face flushed, his eyes dark and heavy-lidded. "Is this really what you want?"
I nodded, and laid back onto the bed.
The Doctor settled himself next to me, on my right hand side, leaning on his elbow as he pulled off the cap and liberally slicked the fingers of his right hand with clear jelly.
I took the tube from him and held it in my hand as he bent his head and kissed me tenderly, his arm reaching down between my spread thighs and gently probing. I gasped softly when I first felt the pressure of his index finger, but I leant into the kiss; sent calm thoughts of encouragement directly into his mind. I was getting better at this now, and I then sent some very explicit thoughts to him, to see how he'd react. I felt him smile against my lips, probing deeper into me with his fingers.
It had been a good number of months since Ianto had topped me, and there was a little pain, but I couldn't have cared less. I breathed deeply through my nose, concentrated on the sensation of the Doctor's tongue in my mouth, his fingers in my body, and tried to relax as much as I could.
I squeezed a little lube on to my fingers and discarded the tube, and then slicked the Doctor's erection with clear jelly, stroking him at the same time, feeling him shudder against me.
After a few moments, I ran my fingers tenderly over the Doctor's face, pushing at him gently to break his kiss.
"I'm ready now," I said, almost shyly.
The look on the Doctor's face was a mixture of lust, apprehension and tenderness as he withdrew his fingers.
"Like this," I murmured, as I turned my body away from him until I was face down on the bed, and took a pillow into my arms to lean against. The Doctor looked a little surprised, I'd taken him face to face every time so far, but this was how I preferred this particular arrangement. Not that it happened very often. There weren't many men I'd trusted enough to give myself to like this.
He slid inside me fairly easily; he'd worked me well with his fingers beforehand, and I was desperate for him.
I pushed backwards against him, enjoying the sensation of being filled, gasping as he began to move against me. He grazed deliciously against my prostate with every push, and our psychic energy pulsed inside me, making me dizzy with sparks of pleasure.
I braced myself, flexing my legs to raise myself off the bed, and almost naturally, I felt the Doctor's arm slip around to my front and his long fingers begin to feel for me, grasping my shaft firmly and beginning to stroke in tandem with his thrusts.
"Oh... fuck..." I gasped against the pillow as I felt the Doctor's hot mouth on my shoulder, his teeth sinking gently into my flesh. We were one person again. He was inside me. Inside my body. His hands were touching me, stroking me. I could feel his mind and soul entwining with mine. Heard his ragged breathing in my ear. Nothing else in the universe existed.
The electric heat settled in my groin again, and I closed my eyes, concentrated on it, felt it grow inside me. Before very long I felt myself begin to climax and somehow this time I was consciousy able to push the energy back into the Doctor. I yelled into the pillow as I came, and dimly realised the Doctor wasn't far behind, felt him gripping me painfully tight, his teeth leaving marks on my skin as he emptied himself into me with a howl.
The sensations we shared with each other simultaneously left me shaking and drained, moaning and shuddering as the dual aftershocks racked through my body, the weight of the Doctor against my back pushing me pleasantly into the soft mattress.
After a moment I felt him leave my body, and I whimpered at the loss. Then I felt him tugging at me, turning me over on the bed towards him, pulling me into his arms.
There was no aloofness this time, no distance between us.
I could hardly move, but I let the Doctor cradle me as he lay back on the bed and pulled me half on top of him, wrapping himself around me, and covering my face with kisses. I sighed contentedly and nestled against him.
I wanted to say 'thank you', but I didn't have the energy to speak. Instead I used the lingering mental connection between us to press the words into his mind, and I felt him squeeze my shoulders to let me know he'd heard.
After a while, I found the strength to speak.
"Doctor…" I mumbled.
"Yes, sweetheart?" he murmured. I smiled. He was mimicking my term of endearment. He'd never called me that before. I'm not sure he ever would again. But it felt right, at that moment.
"When you leave… if anything happens to you. If you regenerate…"
"Hmm?" His fingers wound gently into my hair.
"You'll come back, won't you? To see us, I mean. As soon as you can. Please. Promise me. Swear to me."
"So you can decide whether you still fancy me or not?" I could hear the smile in his voice.
I shook my head slightly. "No, silly. So we can reconnect the bond."
"What if I turn really ugly?"
"I don't care if you regenerate into Quasimodo's less attractive brother. I love you, not what you look like."
"Are you saying I'm not handsome?" He muttered. I grinned. He'd said that before, in his last body, if I remembered correctly.
"Yeah, okay. You're hot. I admit it. I'm not saying it doesn't help," I said, a little cheekily. He heard him chuckle softly.
I squeezed him. "Seriously. I mean it. This is forever. Swear to me."
"I swear," he said solemnly. And I believed him.
The sensation of the Doctor's arms around me, his fingers stroking softly at my still-damp hair, was all I felt, all I wanted to feel, as I drifted off to sleep.
I don't know why I don't sleep very often. Maybe that lifeforce inside me gives me so much energy that I tire less easily than mortal men. All I know is, whenever I go to sleep... I wake up wishing I hadn't.
To be continued
<< Chapter One
<< Chapter Two
<< Chapter Three
<< Chapter Four
<< Chapter Five
<< Chapter Six
<< Chapter Seven
<< Chapter Eight
<< Chapter Nine
<< Chapter Ten
<< Chapter Eleven
<< Chapter Twelve
<< Chapter Thirteen
<< Chapter Fourteen
<< Chapter Fifteen
<< Chapter Sixteen
<< Chapter Seventeen
<< Chapter Eighteen
<< Chapter Nineteen
<< Chapter Twenty
>> Chapter Twenty One
>> Chapter Twenty Two
>> Chapter Twenty Four
>> Chapter Twenty Five
>> Chapter Twenty Six
>> Chapter Twenty Seven
>> Chapter Twenty Eight