Fic: Evil Genius - Breaking In/Smallville, Cam Price/Lex Luthor, PG
I've already posted a link to this fic, written for scripps's prompt on comment_fic, but for the sake of having the full text on my journal instead of just in a comment somewhere, I'm also posting it here.
It's the most surreal job they have ever gotten. Cam goes with Oz on the initial consult, and Oz doesn't act like anything's amiss (but, then, when does he?) but Cam can feel that there is something wrong with the world even before his mind can make sense of what he's seeing and why it's bothering him.
Take away the wild, dual-toned hair... the 5 o'clock shadow... the loud, graphic tees and stone-washed jeans tucked into classic Uggs... Lighten the skin and slap on a suit that costs more than Cam's life and-
"Oz, we just took a job from Dutch!"
"That was not Dutch."
"But he looks just like-"
"Are you retarded? He's a multi-billion dollar entrepreneur. I don't care if he looks like your Great Aunt Sophia's largest bunyon, we're taking this job."
Cam didn't know that Oz knows about his Great Aunt Sophia, but this is Oz we're talking about, so Cam lets that go. "Yeah, but don't you think it'll be a little awkward when-"
"Not at all, Cammie. And you know why?"
Cam groans. It's never a good thing when Oz asks him if he knows 'why' about something.
"Exactly," Oz says cheerfully, although Cam's declined to give him an answer. "Because it's your job to see that it isn't!"
That isn't actually Cam's job, but Oz is scary so Cam lets that go too.
Having Dutch and slick, sophisticated, rich not!Dutch in the same building together turns out to be just as awkward as Cam feared. Mr. Luthor takes an immediate disliking to his douche-esque doppleganger; Dutch refuses to acknowledge any resemblance between himself and their client (but, now that Cam's mentioned it, he's obsessed with catching glimpses of the guy, forcing Cam to have to shadow him everywhere to prevent him from getting them all into trouble - so that's fun); and somehow Mel takes this last thing, and Cam's morbid curiousity in the existence of a second Dutch (and, even more than that, a second Dutch who isn't the least bit douche-y... Though, judging by the quality and nature of his current security system, he may be an evil genius), to mean that Cam has some sort of crush on her boyfriend.
"You think he's hot, don't you?" Mel says, looking far too happy about it, considering the subject matter. "I'm right! You think my man's hot!"
"I don't-"
"You think Luthor's hot," Mel insists, like a very attractive dog with a helpless bone. "I can tell. You get that look you always get when you're around people you think are hot, like me and Mrs. Oz."
Cam just wants to die. Not only because Mel brought up the thing with Amy again - she promised not to do that - but because Mr. Luthor is standing in the doorway, was presumably standing in the doorway when Mel announced Cam's so-called "attraction" to him.
"Mr. Price, may I have a word with you? That is... if I'm not interrupting anything."
Luthor's face is inscrutable, but from the sharpness of his gaze, Cam is pretty much certain that he heard everything.
"Uh- yeah... I mean yes! Yes, sir! Yes, just- Just a moment..."
Mel bites her bottom lip and Cam really wishes she weren't too adorable to hate.
Thankfully, whatever Mr. Luthor did or did not hear being said between Cam and Mel, he doesn't address it with Cam that day. He doesn't treat Cam any differently... at first, and he doesn't fire them all for standing around talking about whether or not Cam would like to sleep with him, instead of testing out the trigger mechanisms for his automated defense drone network as they're being paid to do (thus ensuring Cam's death at Oz's hands - Luthor is paying them all very well). So Cam figures he's dodged a bullet. Except-
Well.
When he doesn't think of Luth- Lex (Lex has asked Cam to call him that) as some sort of weirdly un-Dutch, Dutch-clone... And now that Mel's pointed it out... Cam maybe sort of does kind of...think that Lex is incredibly hot... And things only get worse after Lex takes a personal interest in Contra's activities and starts hanging around his underground labs while Cam is down there testing circuitry. He starts joining Cam in the panic room when Cam goes in there to help Cash reprogram servers. He's funny, Cam wasn't expecting that, and he's smart (again read: evil genius), and he's interesting - sort of exotic and mysterious.
And when he calls Cam into his study, the day before Contra's scheduled to wrap things up, he says, "As I may have mentioned, Cameron, I don't make a habit of involving myself personally with people under my employ..."
Oddly, he did mention that, one day, so Cam tells him, "Yes."
"But as of tomorrow... you and Contra will no longer be working for me. Correct?"
Cam's mouth goes dry. "Uh-huh..."
"I want to see you again, Cameron," Lex gets to the point, flashing a rare but sincere-looking smile. "After your team is through here. I'm going to give you a number and I hope you'll consider calling it."
Cam takes the card from Lex's hand numbly, forcing himself not to start when Lex purposely brushes their fingers together and grins.
He doesn't feel like he's dodged a bullet... He feels like one is running zig-zags through his body, stirring up adrenaline instead of tearing through his flesh.
Cam says he'll think about it.
Cam does think about it. He can't help it. How often do hot, charming billionaires ask him to call them? Cam just can't get past certain... uncertainties he's having about potentially dating Lex Luthor.
And then, in-keeping with the theme of the week, things get really weird, because Dutch becomes his voice of reason.
"Dude, call him," Dutch urges. "Stop pining over my fine ass and go get you some identically fine ass!"
"I haven't been-"
"What's the hold up, anyhow? I know the guy's bald, but-"
Cam tries to remain disengaged, but he just can't "It's not because he's bald!" Cam explodes. "He's- He's Lex fricking' Luthor! He's a billionaire! And a celebrity! And-"
"And Cammie's having self-esteem issues?" There is nothing more grating (and also sort of weirdly comforting) than an egregiously sympathetic Dutch. "Aw. Don't let that stop you, Cam Man!" Dutch encourages. " If Not!Me digs you the way that you are, you shouldn't sweat not being anything else."
Dutch makes sense. And Cam can't bring up his other problem with the idea of dating Lex (namely, the fact that Lex still looks an awful lot like Dutch to Cam, in the face, and that makes Cam feel odd), but he's still unsure, so he says: "But what about what we saw in his place?" Cam asks, daring to raise the conversation with Dutch that he has been having some form of with Cash for days. "He's some sort of evil genius!"
Dutch just shrugs. "So? We work for one. Why not date another?"
Cam can't really disagree with that.
He makes the call once Dutch has left the room.
[end]
It's the most surreal job they have ever gotten. Cam goes with Oz on the initial consult, and Oz doesn't act like anything's amiss (but, then, when does he?) but Cam can feel that there is something wrong with the world even before his mind can make sense of what he's seeing and why it's bothering him.
Take away the wild, dual-toned hair... the 5 o'clock shadow... the loud, graphic tees and stone-washed jeans tucked into classic Uggs... Lighten the skin and slap on a suit that costs more than Cam's life and-
"Oz, we just took a job from Dutch!"
"That was not Dutch."
"But he looks just like-"
"Are you retarded? He's a multi-billion dollar entrepreneur. I don't care if he looks like your Great Aunt Sophia's largest bunyon, we're taking this job."
Cam didn't know that Oz knows about his Great Aunt Sophia, but this is Oz we're talking about, so Cam lets that go. "Yeah, but don't you think it'll be a little awkward when-"
"Not at all, Cammie. And you know why?"
Cam groans. It's never a good thing when Oz asks him if he knows 'why' about something.
"Exactly," Oz says cheerfully, although Cam's declined to give him an answer. "Because it's your job to see that it isn't!"
That isn't actually Cam's job, but Oz is scary so Cam lets that go too.
Having Dutch and slick, sophisticated, rich not!Dutch in the same building together turns out to be just as awkward as Cam feared. Mr. Luthor takes an immediate disliking to his douche-esque doppleganger; Dutch refuses to acknowledge any resemblance between himself and their client (but, now that Cam's mentioned it, he's obsessed with catching glimpses of the guy, forcing Cam to have to shadow him everywhere to prevent him from getting them all into trouble - so that's fun); and somehow Mel takes this last thing, and Cam's morbid curiousity in the existence of a second Dutch (and, even more than that, a second Dutch who isn't the least bit douche-y... Though, judging by the quality and nature of his current security system, he may be an evil genius), to mean that Cam has some sort of crush on her boyfriend.
"You think he's hot, don't you?" Mel says, looking far too happy about it, considering the subject matter. "I'm right! You think my man's hot!"
"I don't-"
"You think Luthor's hot," Mel insists, like a very attractive dog with a helpless bone. "I can tell. You get that look you always get when you're around people you think are hot, like me and Mrs. Oz."
Cam just wants to die. Not only because Mel brought up the thing with Amy again - she promised not to do that - but because Mr. Luthor is standing in the doorway, was presumably standing in the doorway when Mel announced Cam's so-called "attraction" to him.
"Mr. Price, may I have a word with you? That is... if I'm not interrupting anything."
Luthor's face is inscrutable, but from the sharpness of his gaze, Cam is pretty much certain that he heard everything.
"Uh- yeah... I mean yes! Yes, sir! Yes, just- Just a moment..."
Mel bites her bottom lip and Cam really wishes she weren't too adorable to hate.
Thankfully, whatever Mr. Luthor did or did not hear being said between Cam and Mel, he doesn't address it with Cam that day. He doesn't treat Cam any differently... at first, and he doesn't fire them all for standing around talking about whether or not Cam would like to sleep with him, instead of testing out the trigger mechanisms for his automated defense drone network as they're being paid to do (thus ensuring Cam's death at Oz's hands - Luthor is paying them all very well). So Cam figures he's dodged a bullet. Except-
Well.
When he doesn't think of Luth- Lex (Lex has asked Cam to call him that) as some sort of weirdly un-Dutch, Dutch-clone... And now that Mel's pointed it out... Cam maybe sort of does kind of...think that Lex is incredibly hot... And things only get worse after Lex takes a personal interest in Contra's activities and starts hanging around his underground labs while Cam is down there testing circuitry. He starts joining Cam in the panic room when Cam goes in there to help Cash reprogram servers. He's funny, Cam wasn't expecting that, and he's smart (again read: evil genius), and he's interesting - sort of exotic and mysterious.
And when he calls Cam into his study, the day before Contra's scheduled to wrap things up, he says, "As I may have mentioned, Cameron, I don't make a habit of involving myself personally with people under my employ..."
Oddly, he did mention that, one day, so Cam tells him, "Yes."
"But as of tomorrow... you and Contra will no longer be working for me. Correct?"
Cam's mouth goes dry. "Uh-huh..."
"I want to see you again, Cameron," Lex gets to the point, flashing a rare but sincere-looking smile. "After your team is through here. I'm going to give you a number and I hope you'll consider calling it."
Cam takes the card from Lex's hand numbly, forcing himself not to start when Lex purposely brushes their fingers together and grins.
He doesn't feel like he's dodged a bullet... He feels like one is running zig-zags through his body, stirring up adrenaline instead of tearing through his flesh.
Cam says he'll think about it.
Cam does think about it. He can't help it. How often do hot, charming billionaires ask him to call them? Cam just can't get past certain... uncertainties he's having about potentially dating Lex Luthor.
And then, in-keeping with the theme of the week, things get really weird, because Dutch becomes his voice of reason.
"Dude, call him," Dutch urges. "Stop pining over my fine ass and go get you some identically fine ass!"
"I haven't been-"
"What's the hold up, anyhow? I know the guy's bald, but-"
Cam tries to remain disengaged, but he just can't "It's not because he's bald!" Cam explodes. "He's- He's Lex fricking' Luthor! He's a billionaire! And a celebrity! And-"
"And Cammie's having self-esteem issues?" There is nothing more grating (and also sort of weirdly comforting) than an egregiously sympathetic Dutch. "Aw. Don't let that stop you, Cam Man!" Dutch encourages. " If Not!Me digs you the way that you are, you shouldn't sweat not being anything else."
Dutch makes sense. And Cam can't bring up his other problem with the idea of dating Lex (namely, the fact that Lex still looks an awful lot like Dutch to Cam, in the face, and that makes Cam feel odd), but he's still unsure, so he says: "But what about what we saw in his place?" Cam asks, daring to raise the conversation with Dutch that he has been having some form of with Cash for days. "He's some sort of evil genius!"
Dutch just shrugs. "So? We work for one. Why not date another?"
Cam can't really disagree with that.
He makes the call once Dutch has left the room.
[end]