Sometimes I feel I've got to get away...
I'm sick again =(
Both Kyra and I are on Prednisone...Call us the Prednisone Pair...We are very hungry and have frequent mood swings
My first week of school was horrible. I missed the first day. The second day was nothing but a stressful nasuea blur. I missed the third day...And drove all the way to Stony Brook on the fourth...Went to 20 minutes of my first class...Left...and came home.
It was a bad bad week and a bad bad start to the semester. No drive. No energy. No fun! =(
I feel bad for the people around me. I feel bad for my Mom. Not only am I making disgusting puking noises at 3am (lol)...But I cry every other morning...And then I cried because we scheduled a doctor's appointment which would cause me to miss my first quiz of the semester. I couldn't keep it in...LoL...I'm such a freaking baby...But she called the doctor and re-scheduled it for later. Therefore I am driving ALL the way out to Stony Brook (45 minutes East)...To sit through a fifteen minute quiz...Then driving all the way back home (45 minutes back west) and then out to Queens for my appointment (45 minutes West...I think?) Fun? I think not.
I feel bad for Elaina because she's always calling me and I'm either sleeping or just feel way to horrible to even pick up the phone. What kind of freaking friend is that? I get so mad at myself when I can't pick up the phone and be like "Hey...Yeah...I don't feel good...K...Bye"...Instead I just stare at it while it rings...and hope that she understands. I mean...I did tell her I haven't been feeling good...But still...I need to be there and it bothers me so much that I can't be.
And my poor little Jody. She comes over whenever she can...and she's so sweet for doing that. But then when she comes over...whatever spot I'm in...I usually don't move from it. Lately it's been the couch. So she'll come over for an hour or two, stare at the TV with me...And then leave. There is nothing fun or romantic about any of that...I just feel to naseau to do anything...I can't even talk on the phone with out feeling like I'm going to throw up...I know she always says she doesnt care and blah blah..But being in a relationship with me over the past few months cannot be fun ...at all.
Blah! So after I came home today from school...My mom dragged me to get blood work done..And then we came home...I slept for a few hours...And woke up with prednisone in my face...We fought a little...I told her I'd rather die...and then took 60 mg. LoL...A few hours later I was finally hungry...And I did feel better...But my symptoms keep comeing at night so I threw up before and had this really really bad headache...And since I can't take anything for it I started googling at home remedies...And the only thing in the house that was on any websites was lemon...So I spent about half of an hour trying to squeeze a lemon to make tea...and then I tried to like...grind up the outside to rub it on my temples...LoLoL...I'm such a retard...I mean...I think my headache is gone...but seriously...I'm retarted...
So now that I'm on prednisone (and the crazy moodswings havent quite kicked in yet)...I'm like...super depressed. I mean...Part of me loves it...I love feeling better...getting all of this almost..psychotic energy...and even that 'false sense of security and happiness' thing isn't all that bad...But then when I start comeing off of it I go through withdrawl, realize that Ive gained weight and that my face is round, and all of that energy and happy..secure...yay is just...gone...So while yes...buh bye symptoms...It's like...trying to kick a drug habit.
Its almost 4 am and I'm not tired (Side effect: Insomnia). I want to eat...But it's my first night on the stuff...I can't already be stuffing my face can I? I dont think I'll be able to sleep unless I have food...Which is SO obnoxious...There has to be some kind of solution to this? Like...how can I keep myself healthy when I have absolutely not self control? I finally convinced myself to give up fast food too...And I was doing SO well...If I get a craving...That's it...I'm done..haha
I guess that's all I have to say for now...I like to vent =D
xoxo
Both Kyra and I are on Prednisone...Call us the Prednisone Pair...We are very hungry and have frequent mood swings
My first week of school was horrible. I missed the first day. The second day was nothing but a stressful nasuea blur. I missed the third day...And drove all the way to Stony Brook on the fourth...Went to 20 minutes of my first class...Left...and came home.
It was a bad bad week and a bad bad start to the semester. No drive. No energy. No fun! =(
I feel bad for the people around me. I feel bad for my Mom. Not only am I making disgusting puking noises at 3am (lol)...But I cry every other morning...And then I cried because we scheduled a doctor's appointment which would cause me to miss my first quiz of the semester. I couldn't keep it in...LoL...I'm such a freaking baby...But she called the doctor and re-scheduled it for later. Therefore I am driving ALL the way out to Stony Brook (45 minutes East)...To sit through a fifteen minute quiz...Then driving all the way back home (45 minutes back west) and then out to Queens for my appointment (45 minutes West...I think?) Fun? I think not.
I feel bad for Elaina because she's always calling me and I'm either sleeping or just feel way to horrible to even pick up the phone. What kind of freaking friend is that? I get so mad at myself when I can't pick up the phone and be like "Hey...Yeah...I don't feel good...K...Bye"...Instead I just stare at it while it rings...and hope that she understands. I mean...I did tell her I haven't been feeling good...But still...I need to be there and it bothers me so much that I can't be.
And my poor little Jody. She comes over whenever she can...and she's so sweet for doing that. But then when she comes over...whatever spot I'm in...I usually don't move from it. Lately it's been the couch. So she'll come over for an hour or two, stare at the TV with me...And then leave. There is nothing fun or romantic about any of that...I just feel to naseau to do anything...I can't even talk on the phone with out feeling like I'm going to throw up...I know she always says she doesnt care and blah blah..But being in a relationship with me over the past few months cannot be fun ...at all.
Blah! So after I came home today from school...My mom dragged me to get blood work done..And then we came home...I slept for a few hours...And woke up with prednisone in my face...We fought a little...I told her I'd rather die...and then took 60 mg. LoL...A few hours later I was finally hungry...And I did feel better...But my symptoms keep comeing at night so I threw up before and had this really really bad headache...And since I can't take anything for it I started googling at home remedies...And the only thing in the house that was on any websites was lemon...So I spent about half of an hour trying to squeeze a lemon to make tea...and then I tried to like...grind up the outside to rub it on my temples...LoLoL...I'm such a retard...I mean...I think my headache is gone...but seriously...I'm retarted...
So now that I'm on prednisone (and the crazy moodswings havent quite kicked in yet)...I'm like...super depressed. I mean...Part of me loves it...I love feeling better...getting all of this almost..psychotic energy...and even that 'false sense of security and happiness' thing isn't all that bad...But then when I start comeing off of it I go through withdrawl, realize that Ive gained weight and that my face is round, and all of that energy and happy..secure...yay is just...gone...So while yes...buh bye symptoms...It's like...trying to kick a drug habit.
Its almost 4 am and I'm not tired (Side effect: Insomnia). I want to eat...But it's my first night on the stuff...I can't already be stuffing my face can I? I dont think I'll be able to sleep unless I have food...Which is SO obnoxious...There has to be some kind of solution to this? Like...how can I keep myself healthy when I have absolutely not self control? I finally convinced myself to give up fast food too...And I was doing SO well...If I get a craving...That's it...I'm done..haha
I guess that's all I have to say for now...I like to vent =D
xoxo