"i lost a leg, i lost an eye"-hole
when you're not looking, but you know someone is going through some hard times
you reach out and the person lies and tells you all that was written in a fit.
your arm thuds against a window. your heart knows the veil is a lie
and because of geography, you just hope you can make it and see the person in time
to catch up.
you don't make it in time.
it's july.
it's a week in july that knows ghosts; one poet passed this week, another had a memorial service & it's the birthday of a 3rd no longer here. if this week took this person
it would have been
too
much.
what makes you angry is the fight of all those ghosts
everyone knows they weren't finished.
and this person tried hard to finish on purpose.
and you rage because
and you flail because
and you cry even more
beauty
art
pitch
the idea of this voice absent
scrapes at you with tattoo needle.
his heart was infected.
you reel numbly.
read online medical descriptions.
at the bottom of it all,you are grateful the blade missed
that even a pale body with a saturated liver can hang on
the shell that wouldn't let go of the soft clam insides.
blessing.
praise.
candle flicker lit with hope and spells
that this is a scorching
that there will be recovery
one with you in it just a little.
~~
depression and addiction are such beasts.rampant in the artists.
i've been looking in the mouth of a gift horse and only seen the dark black
pit behind the teeth, the breath bad,the possibility of bite.
i have made my existential decision, but we all arrive at it as individuals,
differently.
you reach out and the person lies and tells you all that was written in a fit.
your arm thuds against a window. your heart knows the veil is a lie
and because of geography, you just hope you can make it and see the person in time
to catch up.
you don't make it in time.
it's july.
it's a week in july that knows ghosts; one poet passed this week, another had a memorial service & it's the birthday of a 3rd no longer here. if this week took this person
it would have been
too
much.
what makes you angry is the fight of all those ghosts
everyone knows they weren't finished.
and this person tried hard to finish on purpose.
and you rage because
and you flail because
and you cry even more
beauty
art
pitch
the idea of this voice absent
scrapes at you with tattoo needle.
his heart was infected.
you reel numbly.
read online medical descriptions.
at the bottom of it all,you are grateful the blade missed
that even a pale body with a saturated liver can hang on
the shell that wouldn't let go of the soft clam insides.
blessing.
praise.
candle flicker lit with hope and spells
that this is a scorching
that there will be recovery
one with you in it just a little.
~~
depression and addiction are such beasts.rampant in the artists.
i've been looking in the mouth of a gift horse and only seen the dark black
pit behind the teeth, the breath bad,the possibility of bite.
i have made my existential decision, but we all arrive at it as individuals,
differently.