Right now, I'm sitting by myself in the dark, but I don't feel alone. I feel so powerful, and yet so helpless at the same time. Closing my eyes, and trying to purify myself.

( Even though I know that I can never wash the filth away. )

I'm sorry, this isn't a real post either.

( Maybe someday. )

( I wonder where it went. )

Let's go backwards, like I was forced to do today when I woke from the comfort of that warm, reassuringly improbable reality. Broken. I felt the cool air on my neck, shivered, and closed my eyes again.

Today
Take my hand, and regress ( Read more... )

So today I woke up to the wonderful news that I wouldn't be able to drive to school today. Apparently my car is leaking a lot of coolant, so until my dad finds the leak and fixes it, we have some serious transportation issues. My main issue? I had to take the metro to school today ( Read more... )

Sometimes when I'm skipping along, I have the weirdest thoughts.

( In 15 minutes, this is a poor effort to get a fleeting thought into words )

My midterms are finally over with. I don't know how they went, and I don't think I really want to know. All I can think about is how little desire I have to go outside, and about how much I hate this body of mine. You'd think that all the medical advancements that we've made would've made me healthier, but noo... I do everything people tell me to ( Read more... )

It seems like Wednesday has been my update day for the past couple of weeks, and I see no reason to break that trend now. Well, I was actually planning to spend this time working on an essay of mine that was supposed to be due Friday, but it got pushed back a little, so I have some breathing room now. So I'm going to take a minute and just breathe ( Read more... )

It has occurred to me that since I am in the habit of presenting myself so as to be deliberately misunderstood, it is hardly reasonable to expect anyone to understand what I'm trying to say. In a way, that's my challenge to this world ( Read more... )

I read a whole bunch of books today by an author that I used to love when I was younger, and it got me into a really excited/nostalgic sort of melancholy. Sometimes I feel like more than half of me is still stuck somewhere in the middle of teenage angst, and I often feel like I'm the only one who believes that yesterday was so much sweeter than ( Read more... )