Situations
Life is doing ok. School is going strong. I'm actually doing well in my math classes. I have to be careful not to get lazy or too overconfident. I've applied to FIU and just awaiting word.
Work is ok. Just the usual day by day crap. Doing grades, attendance, chit chat, tutor, whatever.
Friends are ok. Roger is getting his stuff together.
I've seen Maira 3 weekends in a row. And I'm sad she isn't here now. I just want to be with her. Nothing gets to me more than not having her say I'm her man in every sense. I Know she'll read this and I'm feeling very blunt now. I love her to death. It's not that I'm getting impatient and frustrated. But sometimes you just want to feel complete. YOu're so close, yet so far. However, she does love me. And I am the one always sticking to her. Always here. Never letting go. She turned 21 and now she's able to just walk into a club. Which yes does worry me. Last night she went to a new club which has its origins in Miami. It was quite similar to what you see in Miami so the comfort level is risen. She told me, kidding (after some "pouting), that she made out with 2 guys. She then kept reiterating how even if she makes out with 50 billion guys that she will still come home to me and always love me. To her it may seem like she's throwing water on a fire and making me feel better. Quite frankly it gives me a not so pretty picture. To me it's more like a, "I just reached a new level and I'm having fun and it's very likely I'm going to have more fun and want to and I just want to let you know that you're still the man despite blah blah blah." I understand though. She is seeing this opportunity and it's enticing. It's like a subconscious utterance.
I know some of you may say (even though only 1 person most likely reads this thing anyway) that I shouldn't waste my time. That it's inenvitable you're going to get hurt. Why put yourself through it? Well, love hurts. Love pains. And dammit to hell if I have to sit on a phone 500 miles away while the woman I love is in a drunken stupor telling me how 3 guys grabbed her ass, then dammit I will. And you better believe I'll be pissed. It's a natural reaction. I'm not the type to say, "Hey, that's ok. Here, let me help you stick your foot up my ass some more." If I didn't get pissed, then she should worry. It's that, "HEy, fine. Go ahead. Have YOUR fun." that is the bad sign. Then it says that I'll be ok because I'll be having fun too. But I won't. I made a promise and I don't want anyone but Maira. I don't. Just her. Just her t go out with. JUst her to kiss. Just her to make love to. JUst her to cuddle with. Just her. And yes, I want to be the only one for her. I don't want to lock her up. That is not my intention. I just want to be with her. I want to be the man she is kissing and dancing with. It's tough, but what can you do?
I love you, baby. I do. With all my heart. I want you. I need you. I will be here for you. Always. All I hope for is that you return the favor.
Work is ok. Just the usual day by day crap. Doing grades, attendance, chit chat, tutor, whatever.
Friends are ok. Roger is getting his stuff together.
I've seen Maira 3 weekends in a row. And I'm sad she isn't here now. I just want to be with her. Nothing gets to me more than not having her say I'm her man in every sense. I Know she'll read this and I'm feeling very blunt now. I love her to death. It's not that I'm getting impatient and frustrated. But sometimes you just want to feel complete. YOu're so close, yet so far. However, she does love me. And I am the one always sticking to her. Always here. Never letting go. She turned 21 and now she's able to just walk into a club. Which yes does worry me. Last night she went to a new club which has its origins in Miami. It was quite similar to what you see in Miami so the comfort level is risen. She told me, kidding (after some "pouting), that she made out with 2 guys. She then kept reiterating how even if she makes out with 50 billion guys that she will still come home to me and always love me. To her it may seem like she's throwing water on a fire and making me feel better. Quite frankly it gives me a not so pretty picture. To me it's more like a, "I just reached a new level and I'm having fun and it's very likely I'm going to have more fun and want to and I just want to let you know that you're still the man despite blah blah blah." I understand though. She is seeing this opportunity and it's enticing. It's like a subconscious utterance.
I know some of you may say (even though only 1 person most likely reads this thing anyway) that I shouldn't waste my time. That it's inenvitable you're going to get hurt. Why put yourself through it? Well, love hurts. Love pains. And dammit to hell if I have to sit on a phone 500 miles away while the woman I love is in a drunken stupor telling me how 3 guys grabbed her ass, then dammit I will. And you better believe I'll be pissed. It's a natural reaction. I'm not the type to say, "Hey, that's ok. Here, let me help you stick your foot up my ass some more." If I didn't get pissed, then she should worry. It's that, "HEy, fine. Go ahead. Have YOUR fun." that is the bad sign. Then it says that I'll be ok because I'll be having fun too. But I won't. I made a promise and I don't want anyone but Maira. I don't. Just her. Just her t go out with. JUst her to kiss. Just her to make love to. JUst her to cuddle with. Just her. And yes, I want to be the only one for her. I don't want to lock her up. That is not my intention. I just want to be with her. I want to be the man she is kissing and dancing with. It's tough, but what can you do?
I love you, baby. I do. With all my heart. I want you. I need you. I will be here for you. Always. All I hope for is that you return the favor.