Nerves and things.
I know its been forever since i've updated, and that's a whole nother story. Right now I'm just using this journal for an expression of my emotions.
I joined the political science society on campus. I wasn't really sure what I was getting into, but i wanted to be involved in a student organization and I was new to this whole political science thing, so I thought it would be a good fit. For the most part it is. I really like the girl in charge, I have some friends and am networking out. Tori asked me if I was busy today, if I wanted to go to UNI day at the state capital to help represent the society. I said sure, I wasn't doing anything. So here I am. I never saw Tori all day today. And we really had no idea what they were doing.
I hate feeling out of my depth like that. I was so nervous, I barely knew two other kids there and when the lieutenant govenor stopped, shook my hand and I had to ask her who she was, I was SOOO embarrassed. I'm not yet a political officianado. I'm just starting to feel like I know whereI stand on issues and in the grand sceme of things. I haven't even begun to research canidates, elections, whathave you. I may have been star struck, but I also felt like a big moron.
She's standing there, expectantly waiting for me to give her my speiel, and I don't know what I'm trying to promote. I'm not trying to recruit them to the society, The goal was to encourage legislatures to appropriate more funds for my school, but she knows that's what we want. It seems stupid to repeat it. It seemed more worthwhile to just simply put a face with the campus. *covers face* I was just mortified. I'm still mortified, and frankly a little disgusted at myself for not finding out how or what I was supposed to be pushing on whoever stopped in front of me. I swore I was only going for moral support, to stand back and let the other kids speak up.
I have too much to do to spend the rest of the day feeling sorry for myself. It's done now and it's time to move on. I'm sure Mrs Reynolds meets hundreds of constituents and what's one more gal who doesn't know what she's doing. My best hope is that I haven't bugged the crap out of Mary and she'll call me and hire me for the part time gig at the Starbucks. That would be a nice little bandage to my poor bruised ego.