(no subject)
I would just get in my car and drive until I felt better but I’d just have cough up $40 to fill up my gas tank afterwards. I can’t stand feeling confined. This is killing me. I know I am going to make a rash stupid decision about buying a house because of all the pressure. I feel like saying fuck it and renting a place but why would I want to do something stupid like that when I can make a smart investment. Truth is my toes are crushed, I’ve got hell’s hound tearing at my ass, and I am being overwhelmed with information which is for the most part is idle bullshit. I should just rent. I should just suck it up and find a fucking room mate so I throw less money out and learn to live with some one else flaws. If I could just find temporary housing for like 60 days until I got affairs straight and my head reattached, I think I would be in a position to make a wiser decision. I have one wide open path to failure with heavy penalty and it fucking sucks. I am in the shittiest ass mood right now. I want to go home and I’m fucking here already. I need therapy, this rant therapy is insufficient and I can’t even take it out on a box of girl scout cookies or a gallon of ice cream. My tolerance for sacrifice is maxed the fuck out, over the limit, INSUFFICIENT MOTHER FUCKING FUNDS. How absurd, I just want to scream my head off. I’m going Spartan, fuck this shit!