Changes
All things must change to something new, to something strange.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807 - 1882)
30 lbs. and counting...
I finally saw a doctor in April, what with finally getting some health insurance, and she informed me that if my blood pressure didn't stay in a comfortable range, I would need to start taking meds to control it. You know, like the meds my father takes. Well, there was no way I was going to let that happen. So I joined a gym and even hired a trainer. I originally thought I would just exercise and get my fitness level up and let the pounds fall where they may. But once I got a trainer it was all, what's your goal, and then, well ok you have to lose this much by next week, this much by the following week, etc. I just kind of gulped and decided to do as I was told. Then she started zeroing in on my eating, which I was not happy about. I wanted to keep doing Atkins but she wanted me to count calories and fat grams. The horror! I decided to give it a try though, because quite honestly, I was already experiencing Atkins fatigue. I just couldn't stay on it anymore.
So, with a lot less food and a lot more sweat, I've managed to lose a medium-sized 3-year-old. My pulse rate is in the 60s, my blood pressure varies from normal to low normal, and I'm having to throw out (i.e., give to Goodwill) a lot of clothes I can no longer fit in. But the best thing is that I get to eat 6 times a day, and I just had an egg, bacon, AND toast with yummy strawberry preserves for breakfast! Oh, and pasta and rice are on the menu again. Fantastic!
Fach me...
This has been a battle I've been fighting with myself since I got here. I love the drama of the big lyric roles, but I have finally accepted that those are not what people would hire me for. I have a smaller voice than most, and even with me finally figuring out the resonance issue, my voice is just too cute to be singing alongside those big, hairy voices.
You would think I'd feel bad about giving up the heavy lyric rep, but I'm really happy about it. First of all, it's just rep. It's not who I am. Secondly, the lighter rep is just so much easier for me that I feel tons more confident singing it. Fuck Mimi. I'll stick with Susanna, Ann Truelove, and Cleopatra. And maybe Juliette, if I could find someone who'd agree to cut that stupid first aria. I hate Ah, je veux vivre with a passion.
The big problem I had with the lighter rep was really my concept of how to sing it. I've finally figured out that if I just sing it the way I normally sing, not holding back, singing with full voice, then the light, higher rep is really quite easy. And I can keep my warm timbre, thank you very much.
Detaching...
There was a time I was completely focused on the jobs. The teaching, the churching, the more teaching. Since early this year though, I've been feeling...detached. And things happened throughout the year to remind me that this is not all there is. That this shouldn't be all there is. Too much has been sacrificed.
So the next year will be all about figuring out an exit strategy. Where can I go next? I know the places I want to go, but the how is going to take a little thinking. And then there's Pangur. What if I need to leave the US? Who would take an FIV and FeLV positive cat that needs to eat expensive food and drools all over the furniture?
Thinking...
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1807 - 1882)
30 lbs. and counting...
I finally saw a doctor in April, what with finally getting some health insurance, and she informed me that if my blood pressure didn't stay in a comfortable range, I would need to start taking meds to control it. You know, like the meds my father takes. Well, there was no way I was going to let that happen. So I joined a gym and even hired a trainer. I originally thought I would just exercise and get my fitness level up and let the pounds fall where they may. But once I got a trainer it was all, what's your goal, and then, well ok you have to lose this much by next week, this much by the following week, etc. I just kind of gulped and decided to do as I was told. Then she started zeroing in on my eating, which I was not happy about. I wanted to keep doing Atkins but she wanted me to count calories and fat grams. The horror! I decided to give it a try though, because quite honestly, I was already experiencing Atkins fatigue. I just couldn't stay on it anymore.
So, with a lot less food and a lot more sweat, I've managed to lose a medium-sized 3-year-old. My pulse rate is in the 60s, my blood pressure varies from normal to low normal, and I'm having to throw out (i.e., give to Goodwill) a lot of clothes I can no longer fit in. But the best thing is that I get to eat 6 times a day, and I just had an egg, bacon, AND toast with yummy strawberry preserves for breakfast! Oh, and pasta and rice are on the menu again. Fantastic!
Fach me...
This has been a battle I've been fighting with myself since I got here. I love the drama of the big lyric roles, but I have finally accepted that those are not what people would hire me for. I have a smaller voice than most, and even with me finally figuring out the resonance issue, my voice is just too cute to be singing alongside those big, hairy voices.
You would think I'd feel bad about giving up the heavy lyric rep, but I'm really happy about it. First of all, it's just rep. It's not who I am. Secondly, the lighter rep is just so much easier for me that I feel tons more confident singing it. Fuck Mimi. I'll stick with Susanna, Ann Truelove, and Cleopatra. And maybe Juliette, if I could find someone who'd agree to cut that stupid first aria. I hate Ah, je veux vivre with a passion.
The big problem I had with the lighter rep was really my concept of how to sing it. I've finally figured out that if I just sing it the way I normally sing, not holding back, singing with full voice, then the light, higher rep is really quite easy. And I can keep my warm timbre, thank you very much.
Detaching...
There was a time I was completely focused on the jobs. The teaching, the churching, the more teaching. Since early this year though, I've been feeling...detached. And things happened throughout the year to remind me that this is not all there is. That this shouldn't be all there is. Too much has been sacrificed.
So the next year will be all about figuring out an exit strategy. Where can I go next? I know the places I want to go, but the how is going to take a little thinking. And then there's Pangur. What if I need to leave the US? Who would take an FIV and FeLV positive cat that needs to eat expensive food and drools all over the furniture?
Thinking...