20 Things I Have Learned From RPs
This has been shamelessly stolen from tehkev. SUFFER.
1) The dice are bipolar.
2) The more badass, cool, or collected a character is supposed to be, the more likely he is to find himself in completely embarrassing situations. See above.
3) The most powerful beings in existence are little girls.
4) Orcs really, really like pie. No, really.
5) Getting the highest dice roll is not nearly as satisfying as getting the lowest dice roll, yet still being able to beat everyone else.
6) If you miss part of the battle, you can make up for the EXP loss with witty comments and funny pictures.
7) Being powerful isn't nearly as useful as being smart with what you've got. The former is only useful on a temporary basis; anybody can get knocked down a few pegs. But the latter, the latter can help you anywhere.
8) If you think the dice are bipolar, Winamp is just as bad. You'll get epic orchestral music during the comic relief moments, and you'll get "Happy Boys and Girls" during the dramatic death scene.
9) If I ever get a leadership position, it will end in my friends being put in mortal danger, get personally aquainted with (un)natural desires disasters (man, that was one hell of a Freudian slip), and have their faces burned off by an exploding assassin.
10) The gods are fucked up, man.
11) The bard is never just a bard.
12) And the tailor is never just a tailor.
13) Nor is the shopkeeper ever just a shopkee...you know what, fuck it. You get the idea.
14) Killing a party member is perfectly acceptable, if it turns out that everybody else was planning on doing the same thing eventually.
15) Being too happy with fire spells is a good way to get oneself aquainted with number 14.
16) There's no such thing as an anachronism.
17) You can break a helpless kobold's knees, and still remain a fine, upstanding moral citizen.
18) People can travel instantly (and unexpectedly) from different nations, worlds, universes, realities, and even time itself, without having to worry a thing about disease immunity. One will also never have to worry about not being able to breathe the same air, unless one comes from an underwater race; then you're really fucked.
19) You can, in theory, summon a fire whale. This has yet to be tested, however.
20) It's in your best interests to keep the captive guard alive for as long as possible...or at least, until after you're able to interrogate him about the fourteen billion traps that are all set to kill the hell out of the party. Safety first!
1) The dice are bipolar.
2) The more badass, cool, or collected a character is supposed to be, the more likely he is to find himself in completely embarrassing situations. See above.
3) The most powerful beings in existence are little girls.
4) Orcs really, really like pie. No, really.
5) Getting the highest dice roll is not nearly as satisfying as getting the lowest dice roll, yet still being able to beat everyone else.
6) If you miss part of the battle, you can make up for the EXP loss with witty comments and funny pictures.
7) Being powerful isn't nearly as useful as being smart with what you've got. The former is only useful on a temporary basis; anybody can get knocked down a few pegs. But the latter, the latter can help you anywhere.
8) If you think the dice are bipolar, Winamp is just as bad. You'll get epic orchestral music during the comic relief moments, and you'll get "Happy Boys and Girls" during the dramatic death scene.
9) If I ever get a leadership position, it will end in my friends being put in mortal danger, get personally aquainted with (un)natural desires disasters (man, that was one hell of a Freudian slip), and have their faces burned off by an exploding assassin.
10) The gods are fucked up, man.
11) The bard is never just a bard.
12) And the tailor is never just a tailor.
13) Nor is the shopkeeper ever just a shopkee...you know what, fuck it. You get the idea.
14) Killing a party member is perfectly acceptable, if it turns out that everybody else was planning on doing the same thing eventually.
15) Being too happy with fire spells is a good way to get oneself aquainted with number 14.
16) There's no such thing as an anachronism.
17) You can break a helpless kobold's knees, and still remain a fine, upstanding moral citizen.
18) People can travel instantly (and unexpectedly) from different nations, worlds, universes, realities, and even time itself, without having to worry a thing about disease immunity. One will also never have to worry about not being able to breathe the same air, unless one comes from an underwater race; then you're really fucked.
19) You can, in theory, summon a fire whale. This has yet to be tested, however.
20) It's in your best interests to keep the captive guard alive for as long as possible...or at least, until after you're able to interrogate him about the fourteen billion traps that are all set to kill the hell out of the party. Safety first!