Last Two Days plus Good Catch Up
Well the last two days have gone by quite quickly, yesterday I felt rocky and screamed, so needed to do that as everyone was pulling me in several directions and all I wanted to do all afternoon was finish my work, mark all the education material and get the fuck out of the house for a couple of hours. I ended up finishing everything to a quite high standard, the educational material was passable, going running then on to Tai Chi which I really liked, filling up the limo and asking Mason to take the kids for a very long drive so that they would be quiet so I could clear my head before sleeping, still never slept though woke again just after 4am so did some weights and relaxed in the morning before leaving the house very early for the fasting blood tests.
I was at the hospital before 8am this morning mindful of getting in and out for the tests quickly before all the patients were in so that I didn't pick up any bugs. I think the fasting threw my system off balance today because I usually eat every two to three hours and yet I'd had to fast for 15 hours.
Tonight I made it to the gym was completely determined, even got in 1200m three times run around the athletics track, then went downstairs for yoga. However, Yoga turned into intermediate pilates something which I have read about before, watched videos but not actually tried beyond the basic weight bearing exercises I have been doing daily for a few months so towards the last ten minutes of the class I started to feel quite sick from the back of my neck which wasn't very nice. If I had of known the class change schedule I would not have lifted the weights for 40 minutes beforehand and perhaps only run twice round the track instead too.
My big son is now on Orlistat in an attempt to shed some weight to keep his heart from becoming weaker than it already is. He also got an exercise referral, he keeps asking me to show him stuff but I think its best to get him a professional as Ive been so busy since coming off disability benefits its unreal. What I wouldn't give for a week flat on my back doing nothing in particular, yeah right, I dont think I could do that any more even if I did want to which I dont I'm loving the way things are right at the moment.
If I could change one thing though it would be creating more quiet for myself. Remember those hundreds of posts I've written about the need for personal quietness so my eyes can settle over the past ten years? well that still has not changed in fact I think now my eye sight has improved somewhat its worse than ever before. I now value a ten minute silence more than ever to re-balance my mind and my eyes but seldom get it here at the moment.
So yes if I could change one thing it would be to have more quiet time with silence just to settle myself each evening.
For those people fairly new to my blog, this blog was started by me in October 2003, most of the posts over the past eighteen months have been public ones but there are lots which are hidden for friends only so if you feel there are gaps in the dates then that is the reason, you will need an account with livejournal and then request to read my friends only posts, if I know you personally or our lives have crossed online several times through one of the other things I am part of then I'll approve the request, please dont be offended if I dont approve a friends request though, I do like to keep some things hidden from mass view, work stuff and personal rants mainly as usually if I've poured out something its because I needed to use the space to do so and therefore dont want lots of comments to answer over it, once its out there its gone / hopefully.
I've finished the designs of the Storybook Hats now and knitted two samples, its all a bit of a blur really as I dont actually know when I've found the time to fit that in but somehow I have finished them so pattern will be published for loom-knitters over the weekend, its about time another MHE pattern was released as its been far too long.
Health wise my hair has stopped falling out in huge bunches, I need to have abdominal surgery again to stop the metal mesh from swinging about but my brilliant surgeon has assured me it will be him personally so I'm not worried in the slightest about it as its him, should the situation change and it suddenly not be him personally I am not sure I can go through with it so watch this space I'm going for a scan first to see what needs to be done, will take it from there.
Albinism, I am taking part in some medical research into Nystagmus at the moment, since loosing so much weight my eyesight has continued to improve something which has shocked me to the core. When I go outside now even in daylight I can see clocks on churches, tall buildings, bus numbers, the tv information screens at the station, signs, posters, road signs, its just so bizarre, nothing like this has ever happened to me before, I was virtually blind until I was over five years old, had pretty poor sight throughout school and college, uni went by in a blur of getting lost and then adulthood has had challenges where I've had to adapt with children in tow, wheelchair nightmare came and was seen off my me, now though I have all this clarity which is scary and exciting for me, I've not experienced anything like this before and I'm pretty sure from speaking with medical professionals that not too many people have either.
Its something to do with the changes in metabolism, the blood flow to the back of the eye and less fatty deposits in the bloodstream, will publish findings when the research is complete. Its very exciting stuff though and something which I am proud to be a part of.
In amongst all the hive of activity this past month I've actually managed to sort out Ivan's 12th birthday which is coming up in a couple of weeks. He's very excited about this as he has no clue what I have planned for him or what his surprise present is either. I love doing this, I have grown better at keeping the secret though over the past few years so far so good I have not let anything slip.
So about Tai Chi last night, very moving experience, the positive energy was definitely something I could physically feel, only thing was during the most meditative parts there was a woman in the studio next door shouting over the loud music during a Spin Cycle class, why didn't she just turn the music down to speak instead of shouting so badly? I did make suggestions after the session about moving downstairs to a more appropriate venue for something so spiritually moving. I showed the instructor the yoga hall when we'd finished which he quite liked but it appeared to have another class going on in there at that time but with music so to me its more apt for them to move and we take that space as its at the end of the building and nicely quiet, perfect for Tai Chi.
As well as that, the free trial of our karate sessions is about to come to an end next week, I really can not justify paying the money to stay with the same place and would like to change to a different venue a bit nearer to us where the money actually goes further, otherwise I will be throwing myself into a situation I detest where I will be working so many hours to pay for it I won't actually enjoy a single second as I'll be resentful instead. Existing to work or working to exist? either does not suit me at all never has.
Now that I've adopted a nice health and fitness lifestyle I feel angry when I have to use the time I could be physically moving about to sit in front of my laptop but needs must I guess and the kids like that they can do more too now, Ivan and Imogen were in the gym this evening the entire time I did my run then workout followed by the class. They are doing so well at their studies, not sure if medical school is still on the cards for Imogen as I think she's evolved from that dream but we are still going in to watch brain surgery together which now I can see, walk and stand, I am very excited about doing. The questions and answer session at the end will be awesome I can already tell. I was chatting with one of the surgical team the other day and found the whole thing completely fascinating.
I think as soon as Angelica gets home from the air scouts tonight I'll fall asleep with her. She's asked me to use her spending money this week and buy her a blog as she wants to write, fantastic news I think, so I'll sort that out then go to bed later after I've finished a few things off first.
Guitar news, before sorting out the silver sax I've decided to hunt for a white electro-acoustic guitar, maybe even a twelve string like I played previously. It must be white with black markings as the one that got away was like that and I loved it plus I just like white with black markings :) So the hunt is on, I have already found a six string jumbo electro-acoustic that is six steel string and only 10 miles away so I could go in person to try out and buy then bring home to prevent damage in the post, will give it a few more days first and see if any twelve string ones turn up first. The music people in my life who shall remain nameless in this post can't wait for me to have my own guitar, I've been using someone else's but to have my own it always injects a different element to the acoustic sound, I connect more I think when I love the instrument fully and its part of me and extension of my arms more or less.
So lots to be excited about, Gemma and I are meeting on Wednesday, she is going to sort out my overgrown fringe amongst other things then I'll arrange for the photographer to come and do the magazine photographs for the first article. Its all happening, I'll tell you more about the tv and magazines next time I manage to do a full entry, for now though I think I better crack on until Angelica gets home then fall asleep with my beautiful daughter.
I was at the hospital before 8am this morning mindful of getting in and out for the tests quickly before all the patients were in so that I didn't pick up any bugs. I think the fasting threw my system off balance today because I usually eat every two to three hours and yet I'd had to fast for 15 hours.
Tonight I made it to the gym was completely determined, even got in 1200m three times run around the athletics track, then went downstairs for yoga. However, Yoga turned into intermediate pilates something which I have read about before, watched videos but not actually tried beyond the basic weight bearing exercises I have been doing daily for a few months so towards the last ten minutes of the class I started to feel quite sick from the back of my neck which wasn't very nice. If I had of known the class change schedule I would not have lifted the weights for 40 minutes beforehand and perhaps only run twice round the track instead too.
My big son is now on Orlistat in an attempt to shed some weight to keep his heart from becoming weaker than it already is. He also got an exercise referral, he keeps asking me to show him stuff but I think its best to get him a professional as Ive been so busy since coming off disability benefits its unreal. What I wouldn't give for a week flat on my back doing nothing in particular, yeah right, I dont think I could do that any more even if I did want to which I dont I'm loving the way things are right at the moment.
If I could change one thing though it would be creating more quiet for myself. Remember those hundreds of posts I've written about the need for personal quietness so my eyes can settle over the past ten years? well that still has not changed in fact I think now my eye sight has improved somewhat its worse than ever before. I now value a ten minute silence more than ever to re-balance my mind and my eyes but seldom get it here at the moment.
So yes if I could change one thing it would be to have more quiet time with silence just to settle myself each evening.
For those people fairly new to my blog, this blog was started by me in October 2003, most of the posts over the past eighteen months have been public ones but there are lots which are hidden for friends only so if you feel there are gaps in the dates then that is the reason, you will need an account with livejournal and then request to read my friends only posts, if I know you personally or our lives have crossed online several times through one of the other things I am part of then I'll approve the request, please dont be offended if I dont approve a friends request though, I do like to keep some things hidden from mass view, work stuff and personal rants mainly as usually if I've poured out something its because I needed to use the space to do so and therefore dont want lots of comments to answer over it, once its out there its gone / hopefully.
I've finished the designs of the Storybook Hats now and knitted two samples, its all a bit of a blur really as I dont actually know when I've found the time to fit that in but somehow I have finished them so pattern will be published for loom-knitters over the weekend, its about time another MHE pattern was released as its been far too long.
Health wise my hair has stopped falling out in huge bunches, I need to have abdominal surgery again to stop the metal mesh from swinging about but my brilliant surgeon has assured me it will be him personally so I'm not worried in the slightest about it as its him, should the situation change and it suddenly not be him personally I am not sure I can go through with it so watch this space I'm going for a scan first to see what needs to be done, will take it from there.
Albinism, I am taking part in some medical research into Nystagmus at the moment, since loosing so much weight my eyesight has continued to improve something which has shocked me to the core. When I go outside now even in daylight I can see clocks on churches, tall buildings, bus numbers, the tv information screens at the station, signs, posters, road signs, its just so bizarre, nothing like this has ever happened to me before, I was virtually blind until I was over five years old, had pretty poor sight throughout school and college, uni went by in a blur of getting lost and then adulthood has had challenges where I've had to adapt with children in tow, wheelchair nightmare came and was seen off my me, now though I have all this clarity which is scary and exciting for me, I've not experienced anything like this before and I'm pretty sure from speaking with medical professionals that not too many people have either.
Its something to do with the changes in metabolism, the blood flow to the back of the eye and less fatty deposits in the bloodstream, will publish findings when the research is complete. Its very exciting stuff though and something which I am proud to be a part of.
In amongst all the hive of activity this past month I've actually managed to sort out Ivan's 12th birthday which is coming up in a couple of weeks. He's very excited about this as he has no clue what I have planned for him or what his surprise present is either. I love doing this, I have grown better at keeping the secret though over the past few years so far so good I have not let anything slip.
So about Tai Chi last night, very moving experience, the positive energy was definitely something I could physically feel, only thing was during the most meditative parts there was a woman in the studio next door shouting over the loud music during a Spin Cycle class, why didn't she just turn the music down to speak instead of shouting so badly? I did make suggestions after the session about moving downstairs to a more appropriate venue for something so spiritually moving. I showed the instructor the yoga hall when we'd finished which he quite liked but it appeared to have another class going on in there at that time but with music so to me its more apt for them to move and we take that space as its at the end of the building and nicely quiet, perfect for Tai Chi.
As well as that, the free trial of our karate sessions is about to come to an end next week, I really can not justify paying the money to stay with the same place and would like to change to a different venue a bit nearer to us where the money actually goes further, otherwise I will be throwing myself into a situation I detest where I will be working so many hours to pay for it I won't actually enjoy a single second as I'll be resentful instead. Existing to work or working to exist? either does not suit me at all never has.
Now that I've adopted a nice health and fitness lifestyle I feel angry when I have to use the time I could be physically moving about to sit in front of my laptop but needs must I guess and the kids like that they can do more too now, Ivan and Imogen were in the gym this evening the entire time I did my run then workout followed by the class. They are doing so well at their studies, not sure if medical school is still on the cards for Imogen as I think she's evolved from that dream but we are still going in to watch brain surgery together which now I can see, walk and stand, I am very excited about doing. The questions and answer session at the end will be awesome I can already tell. I was chatting with one of the surgical team the other day and found the whole thing completely fascinating.
I think as soon as Angelica gets home from the air scouts tonight I'll fall asleep with her. She's asked me to use her spending money this week and buy her a blog as she wants to write, fantastic news I think, so I'll sort that out then go to bed later after I've finished a few things off first.
Guitar news, before sorting out the silver sax I've decided to hunt for a white electro-acoustic guitar, maybe even a twelve string like I played previously. It must be white with black markings as the one that got away was like that and I loved it plus I just like white with black markings :) So the hunt is on, I have already found a six string jumbo electro-acoustic that is six steel string and only 10 miles away so I could go in person to try out and buy then bring home to prevent damage in the post, will give it a few more days first and see if any twelve string ones turn up first. The music people in my life who shall remain nameless in this post can't wait for me to have my own guitar, I've been using someone else's but to have my own it always injects a different element to the acoustic sound, I connect more I think when I love the instrument fully and its part of me and extension of my arms more or less.
So lots to be excited about, Gemma and I are meeting on Wednesday, she is going to sort out my overgrown fringe amongst other things then I'll arrange for the photographer to come and do the magazine photographs for the first article. Its all happening, I'll tell you more about the tv and magazines next time I manage to do a full entry, for now though I think I better crack on until Angelica gets home then fall asleep with my beautiful daughter.