(no subject)
I woke up suddenly about fifteen minutes ago, back of my head was rumbling and I was groaning I am sure of it, mouth completely dry, legs shaking, inside me felt like a volcano about to erupt, it was scary. Hasn't happened for about a week so I thought I was over the worst of it, apparently not.
When the inside of the back of my head rumbles like that it makes me feel afraid, afraid of something inside there making it happen that I dont know about. What the hell is it? In my sleep I know I was making funny noises and upon waking I heard myself groaning like growling noises.
Pain killers are setting in, well starting to now so things are dying down, legs have stopped and I can feel the inside of my skull easing as well, just if I cough or move suddenly then around the shell of the back pains me.
It is so very scary.
I started listening to Shadows in the Street: Simon Serrailler 5 about three hours ago when I couldnt sleep, I got up and had a pear, banana and few dried apricots. as far as night snacks go that was deliciously sweet and satisfying, I enjoyed them.
Yesterday evening for dinner Angelica and I made a really nice chicken casserole type meal with jacket potatoes, everyone had loads and loads, I had a measured amount but found it hard to finish as there was so much of it, still at only 6.32 fat grams for the meal on my plate I think we did very well. It does worry me that the recommended daily dose is up to 15g in fat grams for each meal as I dont really understand if they want you to eat that much or whether the orlistat works with less as well. Its also interesting to note that as far as meals go I've made two adjustments, switched to extra virgin olive oil from standard supermarket vegetable oil and cut out coconut cream in the Indian foods, the rest of the meals are pretty much ok in around 5 to 8g per plate as it is, with the other two ingredients only bringing them up to slightly more, 8 to 10g in fat grams per plate.
My daily intake has been so far, Friday 21g, Saturday 25.2g Sunday 20.62g in fat grams which is about half the recommended daily dose whilst on orlistat or trying to loose weight with a calorie controlled diet. I've actually been eating about a third more than I usually do throughout the day so possibly more healthier than before plus with the insistence of breakfast in the form of tasteless muesli, I think I'm doing ok for now. Will only be able to tell once the measurements can be taken again next weekend.
Last night after dinner and a film we decided to go for a long drive down to the coast. Margate and Ramsgate look positively dump like compared to what I remember them as from twenty years ago. I became slightly emotional when we parked up and in the dark the kids went to look down the stairs at Sea View, it was my friend George's favourite places to hang out, sit and talk, cuddle up with friends and generally have a laugh. Why did he have to die at only 17 years old? such a waste of a life.
On the way home we stopped off and bought much needed cups of tea to warm up the tummy's of the kids who did seem very grateful for a nice sweet hot drink each.
In bed last night mindful I hadnt sketched since Friday, I decided to try a whole face with head of hair. As he was getting into bed, Hubby glanced at it and said "WOW who's that?" in an amazed voice. That'll do for me I thought, I can draw faces at last :)
Ivan played in a five a side football match on Saturday, came home with the under 12's Kent County trophy completely chuffed to bits as a) he's never really played football before and b) he was the youngest yet scored the goals loving every minute of the day away from home for the first time alone without a sister or brother with him. He's growing up so beautifully and with a killer smile too.
Managed to get a few fibres listed in the shop yesterday as well, not too sure what happened to me I seemed to have a burst of energy around 3pm to 5pm dozed off then Angelica woke me when the food was all ready and on the plates. She is so lovely honestly do not know what I'd do without her at the moment, my eyes had actually started to close whilst I was leaning up against the side cutting up the carrots, this is getting embarrassing now falling asleep at the drop of a hat anywhere in any position no matter what I'm doing. This type of tiredness that you just can not see coming or breakings two secs, usually means he's got to check in with the wife :)
When the inside of the back of my head rumbles like that it makes me feel afraid, afraid of something inside there making it happen that I dont know about. What the hell is it? In my sleep I know I was making funny noises and upon waking I heard myself groaning like growling noises.
Pain killers are setting in, well starting to now so things are dying down, legs have stopped and I can feel the inside of my skull easing as well, just if I cough or move suddenly then around the shell of the back pains me.
It is so very scary.
I started listening to Shadows in the Street: Simon Serrailler 5 about three hours ago when I couldnt sleep, I got up and had a pear, banana and few dried apricots. as far as night snacks go that was deliciously sweet and satisfying, I enjoyed them.
Yesterday evening for dinner Angelica and I made a really nice chicken casserole type meal with jacket potatoes, everyone had loads and loads, I had a measured amount but found it hard to finish as there was so much of it, still at only 6.32 fat grams for the meal on my plate I think we did very well. It does worry me that the recommended daily dose is up to 15g in fat grams for each meal as I dont really understand if they want you to eat that much or whether the orlistat works with less as well. Its also interesting to note that as far as meals go I've made two adjustments, switched to extra virgin olive oil from standard supermarket vegetable oil and cut out coconut cream in the Indian foods, the rest of the meals are pretty much ok in around 5 to 8g per plate as it is, with the other two ingredients only bringing them up to slightly more, 8 to 10g in fat grams per plate.
My daily intake has been so far, Friday 21g, Saturday 25.2g Sunday 20.62g in fat grams which is about half the recommended daily dose whilst on orlistat or trying to loose weight with a calorie controlled diet. I've actually been eating about a third more than I usually do throughout the day so possibly more healthier than before plus with the insistence of breakfast in the form of tasteless muesli, I think I'm doing ok for now. Will only be able to tell once the measurements can be taken again next weekend.
Last night after dinner and a film we decided to go for a long drive down to the coast. Margate and Ramsgate look positively dump like compared to what I remember them as from twenty years ago. I became slightly emotional when we parked up and in the dark the kids went to look down the stairs at Sea View, it was my friend George's favourite places to hang out, sit and talk, cuddle up with friends and generally have a laugh. Why did he have to die at only 17 years old? such a waste of a life.
On the way home we stopped off and bought much needed cups of tea to warm up the tummy's of the kids who did seem very grateful for a nice sweet hot drink each.
In bed last night mindful I hadnt sketched since Friday, I decided to try a whole face with head of hair. As he was getting into bed, Hubby glanced at it and said "WOW who's that?" in an amazed voice. That'll do for me I thought, I can draw faces at last :)
Ivan played in a five a side football match on Saturday, came home with the under 12's Kent County trophy completely chuffed to bits as a) he's never really played football before and b) he was the youngest yet scored the goals loving every minute of the day away from home for the first time alone without a sister or brother with him. He's growing up so beautifully and with a killer smile too.
Managed to get a few fibres listed in the shop yesterday as well, not too sure what happened to me I seemed to have a burst of energy around 3pm to 5pm dozed off then Angelica woke me when the food was all ready and on the plates. She is so lovely honestly do not know what I'd do without her at the moment, my eyes had actually started to close whilst I was leaning up against the side cutting up the carrots, this is getting embarrassing now falling asleep at the drop of a hat anywhere in any position no matter what I'm doing. This type of tiredness that you just can not see coming or breakings two secs, usually means he's got to check in with the wife :)