poke poke poke
Well I do not know what is wrong.
Ive been really grumpy mcgrump lately
I cant seem to figure it out
I havent been sleeping on account of having really task/ocd type dreams.
I havent really been taking my meds.
I know they work and I should I would be better at life.
I get really annoyed with people who have changed I tell them they have and they dont believe me. I also feel abandoned and not important anymore to my special friends. Bah relationships!! They are no good sometimes especially when the people are practically married and are totally a samebreath couple which is super obnoxious and vaguely lesbionic. Living/cohabiting with some one is not really the best idea especially when neither one of you really works and you develop new friends with other people especially couples through your partner. Its never good idea. I know. Before you know it one couples broken up and everything is awkward. You lose your old friends in the mean time and more importantly you sacrifice your personality. And you never get alone time ever. I like have a place to scratch my ass or whatever without some one there all the time. I mean really do people go "lets get stuck up each others butt?" cause thats pretty much what happens. I mean do you even get a chance to shower alone??? I wish people would listen to me and take my advice as someone experienced in this matter.
Thats enough of venting about that subject. The fact is I am out of school. I cant get a job. I have nothing to do all day long. NOTHING. I cant afford a bus pass. I cant even afford to drink. I dont even want to drink for that matter. My elbow still hurts. I made 15 dollars too much for food stamps. I have no money to buy craft things. I bought a extremely over priced wood burner from Cliffs because I have a gift card there and I need something to do with my self before I go insane. It just makes me sad. And then I am home and have all this time and want to hang out but everyone is busy, moved to the east bay, or married. Or being sewn to someone.
EDIT
well on the bright side I neglected to realize that all relationships good or bad and all experiences good or bad are part of our lives forever and make us who we are
and
have fun in the moment
do it till it hurts
blah blah blah
that doesnt really make me feel less lonely and jealous but its a start (?)
Ive been really grumpy mcgrump lately
I cant seem to figure it out
I havent been sleeping on account of having really task/ocd type dreams.
I havent really been taking my meds.
I know they work and I should I would be better at life.
I get really annoyed with people who have changed I tell them they have and they dont believe me. I also feel abandoned and not important anymore to my special friends. Bah relationships!! They are no good sometimes especially when the people are practically married and are totally a samebreath couple which is super obnoxious and vaguely lesbionic. Living/cohabiting with some one is not really the best idea especially when neither one of you really works and you develop new friends with other people especially couples through your partner. Its never good idea. I know. Before you know it one couples broken up and everything is awkward. You lose your old friends in the mean time and more importantly you sacrifice your personality. And you never get alone time ever. I like have a place to scratch my ass or whatever without some one there all the time. I mean really do people go "lets get stuck up each others butt?" cause thats pretty much what happens. I mean do you even get a chance to shower alone??? I wish people would listen to me and take my advice as someone experienced in this matter.
Thats enough of venting about that subject. The fact is I am out of school. I cant get a job. I have nothing to do all day long. NOTHING. I cant afford a bus pass. I cant even afford to drink. I dont even want to drink for that matter. My elbow still hurts. I made 15 dollars too much for food stamps. I have no money to buy craft things. I bought a extremely over priced wood burner from Cliffs because I have a gift card there and I need something to do with my self before I go insane. It just makes me sad. And then I am home and have all this time and want to hang out but everyone is busy, moved to the east bay, or married. Or being sewn to someone.
EDIT
well on the bright side I neglected to realize that all relationships good or bad and all experiences good or bad are part of our lives forever and make us who we are
and
have fun in the moment
do it till it hurts
blah blah blah
that doesnt really make me feel less lonely and jealous but its a start (?)