Its been awhile...
Well its been awhile, not really been much to update about. Been working my ass off to try and get some money together so I can actually have a fall back fund for when I get into college (If I get into college that is).
The play is next weekend, it seems like it hasn't even been two weeks of practice but thats probably because I worked almost every night we had practice and I've only been to like 5 of them. Oh well I know my lines and have my costume and all that ready to go. Plus I get all of next week off.
Apparently I've lost track of time because I've just been notified the christmas dance is coming up. Not like I really care, I've gone every year, alone, and hated every minute of it. For some reason netta wants me to go with Sang Wa but I really don't want to go with her. Shes nice but I don't think she would be very fun to go with. I should probably ask someone but I'm sick of being told no, or "I don't think of you like that" or "Hey I'm going to tell you I want to be with you but then I'll fuck other people and tell you I didn't then treat the situation like you don't know whats going on and then spring your failure on you later" (sorry being bitter)
Really wish I had someone to go with that I didn't have to ask. That it was already determined I'd go with. Or in other words I wish I had a girlfriend but lately thats of no use because I don't want to even try anymore. I put up the face that all I want is some action to people that don't know any better, but to those who do know better, I could care less about that. I just want someone to be with, that sees me as more than just a friend. But as usual thats nothing but useless hope leaking out.
I actually cussed spear out the other day for no reason. I kinda felt bad about it, but then again I didn't. He was acting retarded and it pissed me off when he should have realized I wasn't in a good mood to begin with.
Oh well. I haven't slept in almost 72 hours. I bought some Sominex tonight, I've already taken half of the box. I really need to sleep sometime soon, my body hates this whole no rest deal.
The play is next weekend, it seems like it hasn't even been two weeks of practice but thats probably because I worked almost every night we had practice and I've only been to like 5 of them. Oh well I know my lines and have my costume and all that ready to go. Plus I get all of next week off.
Apparently I've lost track of time because I've just been notified the christmas dance is coming up. Not like I really care, I've gone every year, alone, and hated every minute of it. For some reason netta wants me to go with Sang Wa but I really don't want to go with her. Shes nice but I don't think she would be very fun to go with. I should probably ask someone but I'm sick of being told no, or "I don't think of you like that" or "Hey I'm going to tell you I want to be with you but then I'll fuck other people and tell you I didn't then treat the situation like you don't know whats going on and then spring your failure on you later" (sorry being bitter)
Really wish I had someone to go with that I didn't have to ask. That it was already determined I'd go with. Or in other words I wish I had a girlfriend but lately thats of no use because I don't want to even try anymore. I put up the face that all I want is some action to people that don't know any better, but to those who do know better, I could care less about that. I just want someone to be with, that sees me as more than just a friend. But as usual thats nothing but useless hope leaking out.
I actually cussed spear out the other day for no reason. I kinda felt bad about it, but then again I didn't. He was acting retarded and it pissed me off when he should have realized I wasn't in a good mood to begin with.
Oh well. I haven't slept in almost 72 hours. I bought some Sominex tonight, I've already taken half of the box. I really need to sleep sometime soon, my body hates this whole no rest deal.