SITREP Dec 2011 -- Just some thinking.....
"Well, I can't wait to come home and face the realities of the civilian life."
I read over my ol' LJ posts. Wow, it's a trip to go back and read them. Despite whatever hope I was feelin', I still find ways to knock myself down.
[CAUTION - RANT AT THE END]
That was the last line in my last post. Oh how I want to take those words back.
I'm 3 weeks away from starting school again.
As circumstances would have it, I'm not going to the Academy. Even with my less than 100% GI Bill, it won't cover tuition. And I DON'T want to take up student loans again.
So I opted to get into SJSU's Animation/Illustration Program. Problem: I have no GE classes that can transfer over to cover the lower division requirements for CSU admission. No prob, I'll just go to De Anza. I did think of goin' to CCSF, but I can't live there anymore. It's just, too hectic and changed in the past 7 years. Holy crap, 7 years?!? That's how long I've been gone?
How time flies.
Well, my cousins have their new additions to their families. Aunt's and Uncle are proud of them, and there's my Mom, feelin' left out of the celebration. Her sisters already have grandkids. I could tell the look in her face "when am I going to have a grandchild of my own?" And that was just during Thanksgiving.
I'm thinking of leaving early from X-Mas with my family. Probably spend New Years with friends, rather than family.
I just... need to GTFO my hometown. It's driving me nuts. Stuck in a rut out there, while everyone either has moved out or raising a family.
That's why I love driving out to the Bay Area, visiting friends and enjoying my roadtrips up to Sacramento.
I truely believe once school starts for me, I'll have a different outlook on my life. The 2 years prior to my deployment, I wished I had stayed in active duty.
Holy crap... I'm in my 30's and I still haven't accomplished anything. Haven't finished school, haven't started a family. Others are so lucky. Or have crazy amount of enthusiasm and optimism they can over come this. Wish they'd pass some of that over here.
I must draw, paint, design, and study. I'll have to dig deep for it.
Anyways, I'm off to a wedding reception with a friend. That'll help get this crap off my mind.
I read over my ol' LJ posts. Wow, it's a trip to go back and read them. Despite whatever hope I was feelin', I still find ways to knock myself down.
[CAUTION - RANT AT THE END]
That was the last line in my last post. Oh how I want to take those words back.
I'm 3 weeks away from starting school again.
As circumstances would have it, I'm not going to the Academy. Even with my less than 100% GI Bill, it won't cover tuition. And I DON'T want to take up student loans again.
So I opted to get into SJSU's Animation/Illustration Program. Problem: I have no GE classes that can transfer over to cover the lower division requirements for CSU admission. No prob, I'll just go to De Anza. I did think of goin' to CCSF, but I can't live there anymore. It's just, too hectic and changed in the past 7 years. Holy crap, 7 years?!? That's how long I've been gone?
How time flies.
Well, my cousins have their new additions to their families. Aunt's and Uncle are proud of them, and there's my Mom, feelin' left out of the celebration. Her sisters already have grandkids. I could tell the look in her face "when am I going to have a grandchild of my own?" And that was just during Thanksgiving.
I'm thinking of leaving early from X-Mas with my family. Probably spend New Years with friends, rather than family.
I just... need to GTFO my hometown. It's driving me nuts. Stuck in a rut out there, while everyone either has moved out or raising a family.
That's why I love driving out to the Bay Area, visiting friends and enjoying my roadtrips up to Sacramento.
I truely believe once school starts for me, I'll have a different outlook on my life. The 2 years prior to my deployment, I wished I had stayed in active duty.
Holy crap... I'm in my 30's and I still haven't accomplished anything. Haven't finished school, haven't started a family. Others are so lucky. Or have crazy amount of enthusiasm and optimism they can over come this. Wish they'd pass some of that over here.
I must draw, paint, design, and study. I'll have to dig deep for it.
Anyways, I'm off to a wedding reception with a friend. That'll help get this crap off my mind.