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[nattalie_m]

Why it's so hard to interact with other humans?

A very old friend of mine is back to the town because work. I met him like 15 years ago, maybe more. He was a customer of a place I worked as cashier, we used to drink coffee and talk every day while I was at work. I had boyfriend who worked there wih me. This guy was very respectful and nice and it

Comments

[shampoo_neko02]

Perhaps he always had a sweet spot for you, but had you in the back of his mind if anything ever went wrong in his life. Tho I guess he see's that you are not with anyone and he wants to try and date you I guess. But I understand, you are both friends and no matter what you answer can ruiend the friend relationship.

[nattalie_m]

But the fact that he thinks I am alone doesn't mean I am looking for someone. If you see there is someone who is not flirting to you, who is not showing any feeling, who is talking to you about other person in her life, and you know you will make her feel uncomfortable if you talk about some topics, why you will do it anyways? I don't even want to know how he see me, I am just a friend and I don't pretend to be anything else.

[nahele_101]

I'd let the anger go, but keep your distance. Your gut feeling is probably right and he wants to see if you'd date him now.

[nattalie_m]

nowaday it seems impossible to have a selfless friendship

[siglinde99]

I’m sorry. My usual explanation for that is “boys are stupid” but that’s the same answer I would have given when I was twelve. Not much has changed in all the years since.

[nattalie_m]

it's kinda annoying that the few men I know aren't able to interact with women without trying to end in the bed. Really annoying.

[hana_broom]

It fascinates me how so many people are just obsessed with hooking up - like you say, it mostly just ruins things when you only want friendship. Gah!

[nattalie_m]

the funny thing is that day he came home I told him about all the weird situations I had with men and how much they freak me out. I mentioned that I go on vacations always with someone I'm involved with. Even if he just has curiosity and not any actual feeling, what is the need to make things weird? If he wants to know if 15 years ago I had any feeling for him (maybe he got confused because i was gently and nice with him) my answer will be No, I don't like you in that way... and that will make me feel bad and uncomfortable.

[retrocodex]

Been there, got the t-shirt. Not fun. Some people seem to live in their own selfish bubble, and don't think about how what they do or say will permanently affect relationships around them. It's always driven me crazy.

[nattalie_m]

I wonder if it's ego, to know if he was or is desired so he need to ask. Because maybe the guy has not any actual feeling and it's just curiosity. Personally I don't need and I don't want to know if he had or he has any feeling, fantasy or desire for me. I'm fine just knowing that he likes having a friendship.