Sorry I haven't updated in two weeks!
I also missed Heaven-Monument's Birthday, even though I knew what day it was T-T. Can I still say 'Happy late birthday'? *grovels* I have had a lot to deal with lately, like working two weeks straight (which I don't mind at all), a massive art trade (which took two months to complete), several art requests, RB 19, and my aunt having a stroke last Friday morning. I have finished the art trade, finally got caught up on the requests, finished RB 19, and my aunt is back at work and doing great. *big sigh of relief*
Oh, and here are the next two chapters of A Random Adventure and a link to Ch 1 & 2.
A Random Adventure Ch 1 & 2
Title: A Random Adventure Ch 3 & 4
Canon: FFX OGC
Characters/Parings: Tidus, Cast
Rating: T
Summary: Yuna and her Guardians contiune their journey back to Besaid after a ceremony in Bevelle. The companions learn an interesting tidbit about Auron and the Farplane.
A/N: Humor and possible Spoilers
A Random Adventure
Setting: Yuna and her Guardians are returning to Besaid after attending a ceremony celebrating the induction of the newest junior monks at Macalania Temple. They have decided to rest at the Spring in the woods.
CHAPTER 3
Guadosalam - Noon. Yuna and company are taking a lunch break.
“I didn’t think we’d ever get out of the Thunder Plains!” Tidus exclaimed, around a mouthful of fish. Lulu smiled into her cup of tea and Auron’s shoulders shook suspiciously.
“Too much lightning?” he asked with barely contained mirth.
“I’ve never seen a storm like that.” Yuna said, a small pondering frown on her face,“It was very odd.”
Auron grunted, “Very odd indeed.” Lulu giggled into her tea and quickly said,
“I never knew you were such a talented dancer, Tidus.”
“Traitor!” Tidus muttered as Yuna giggled along with everyone else.
“Tidus very quick, like small lemming.” Kimahri remarked, giving Tidus a friendly slap (and a fresh bruise) on the shoulder.
“You know,” Yuna said, cleaning up the remains of her lunch. “I heard from the Senior monk that the Farplane has become unstable since we defeated Sin. Should we look into it?” There was an awkward silence for a moment and everyone looked at Auron.
“Don’t let me stop you.” he rumbled, taking a draught from his sake jar.
“Maybe some other time.” Rikku said with false indifference and a nervous giggle.
“But what if it’s a danger to others, you know?” Wakka pondered. “What if fiends pour out and …”
“Just drop it Wakka.” Tidus said, suddenly solemn. Auron rolled his eye over the rim of his glasses. Yep. The boy was looking at him with that sad puppy face.
“Stop it. I don’t need any of your pity.”
Tidus frowned and the arguing stopped. Auron rose and straightened his robe. “I can take care of myself. Lets get going.”
“Stubborn old man.” Tidus murmured as Auron stalked out of the Inn.
“He doesn’t want us to feel like we have to protect him or feel sorry for him, ya?” Wakka said ruffling Tidus hair.
“Ya.” Tidus replied, twitching a smile.
“Here we go.” Yuna said moving up the steps. She had suggested that Auron stand guard at the bottom of the steps, just in case anything got past them. Of course, he had seen right through her attempt to keep him out of danger. He had smiled and stayed at the bottom of the stairs, which surprised the back up argument right out of her.
“That was too easy, ya?” Wakka whispered to Lulu, with a backward glance down the stairs. Lulu nodded and entered the Farplane.
“So many pyre-flies.” Yuna gasped as thousands swarmed energetically around them.
“They seem agitated - Ack!” Tidus stumbled backwards as Seymour suddenly appeared in front of him. “Alright,” he demanded “Who was thinking about Seymour?” Everyone looked at Yuna. She gasped indignantly,
“It wasn’t me!”
“Sorry,” Rikku said meekly. “They kinda go together. You can’t think about the creepy Farplane without thinking about creepy Seymour.” Wakka rolled his eyes, Tidus shook his head, Lulu and Yuna both groaned, and Kimahri remained silent.
“Lets get on with this.” Lulu sighed in exasperation, turning to continue on. She stopped short and choked on a yelp as she was confronted with Auron. “Alright,” She called over her shoulder in irritation. “Who was thinking about the old guy?”
“It’s me.” Auron stalked past Lulu who sputtered in embarrassment. She turned, slack-jawed as everyone snickered.
“I told you it was too easy, Lu.” Wakka said with a sigh as Auron rejoined the group.
Pyre-flies swarmed angrily around them, their small comet-like forms whizzing and darting. There was none of the gentle meandering wafting that they usually displayed. Auron grunted and fell to one knee, pyre-flies leaving his body. “Auron!” Yuna cried, drawing everyone’s attention. Tidus and Kimahri, being closest, lifted him to his feet (Although Tidus was mostly a bystander as Kimahri lifted him one handed).
“Come on old man, pull yourself together. You’re falling apart…er, drifting away.” Tidus stammered. Auron rolled his eye at the boy as the pyre-flies massed a few feet away from them. Auron grunted and glared at the pyre-flies. After a few moments he became a little more solid and shook off Kimahri’s helping hand. Odd, the Unsent Guardian thought. Something was different; wrong. But what?
Auron suddenly realized that everyone was looking at him, and he got the impression that they were trying not to laugh. He looked down at himself. Ah. That was it. Auron’s pants were gone, replaced instead by a skimpy pair of shorts, which did nothing to cover his manly legs. “I know that was you,“ he snarled, pointing an accusing finger at Tidus, who was trying to look innocent.
“Ummm…nice legs?” he replied, shaking with retained laughter.
Auron heard Rikku giggle. He looked down at himself again, dreading what he might see. “It’s not my color.” he commented dryly as he scowled at he blue lacy dress he was wearing. “And blond hair doesn’t suit me.” he added as knee-length hair cascaded over his shoulders. “And those just don’t belong.” he snarled.
“Look!” Tidus crowed, “Auron has knockers!”
“Hey! “ Rikku giggled “That looks much better!” She burst into fits of giggles with Yuna and Lulu. Tidus outright guffawed, and Kimahri made the chuffing sound that did him for a laugh.
“Hey, what about this, guys?” Tidus asked between gasps as Auron acquired a pair of bandy-kneed Hypello legs.
Auron stood fuming as the Spawn of Jecht took full advantage of his status as Unsent. It was the one thing he had hoped that they would never figure out, the pyre-flies could be used to manipulate his appearance. It sucked, but it was true. Auron suddenly felt a lot colder for some reason. A reason that rapidly became hideously clear as Yuna and Rikku screamed and covered their faces, Kimahri leaping to shield them from the terrible sight. Lulu quickly turned her back while Wakka doubled over laughing and Tidus whistled tauntingly. All of Auron’s clothes were gone, leaving only his sake jar hanging in a strategic place.
Tidus gave Wakka a high-five and collapsed on the ground, laughing. “I couldn’t resist!” Wakka crowed, holding his sides.
“ENOUGH!” Auron took control of his form as the last echoes bounced into silence. “Now,” he said straightening his coat, letting his burning gaze sweep over his companions, all of them at least having the decency to look ashamed. “If you are all finished making a chocobo’s rear out of me…don’t even think about it!” he said to Tidus, who whistled quietly to himself and suddenly found the sky profoundly interesting. “As I was saying, let’s do what we came here to do: Make sure this place is safe.”
Later, Auron realized that perhaps they all should have just left. Maybe he should not have reminded them why they were there. No sooner than he had reminded the group of the purpose of their visit to the Farplane, than the fiends had appeared. And of course they had to be the biggest, scariest ones. One Spectral Keeper, a Yunalesca (in all three forms, of course), a Behemoth King, one Braska’s Ultimate Summon, not one, but two Evraes, and a giant cat (courtesy of Tidus).
This last fiend proved extremely difficult to defeat. This was due to the fact that Tidus kept ‘adding’ to it, as his imagination went on a dangerous “What if..” spree. It did not help matters when Tidus helpfully suggested that Yuna summon Valefor. Auron could have throttled him right then and there, forget the fiend. Poor Valefor looked sufficiently like a bird, and Giant Cat had chased her all over the Farplane. Yuna’s quick thinking was the only thing that saved the Aeon from becoming a Giant Cat snack. Ifrit was a much more effective choice.
Once all of the fiends were taken care of, the exhausted party relaxed. “Don’t anybody even think about thinking!” Wakka said quickly, pointing to Tidus. “Especially you!” Tidus shook his head solemnly and replied
“Don’t worry. My mind’s a blank-Owwwww!” Tidus rubbed his skull where an irate Valefor had just landed a sharp peck.
“I…she…she bit me!” Tidus exclaimed as the Aeon was dismissed.
“I’d bite you too.” was all Auron said as he turned to lead the companions out of the Farplane. Tidus grumbled and rubbed the back of his head where Valefor had bitten him. Okay, so maybe he had deserved that. Poor Valefor did look an awful lot like a bird.
CHAPTER 4
Moonflow, North Bank - Yuna and company have just arrived at the shoopuff ferry. It is early morning.
Tidus plodded along in a daze, supported on either side by two beautiful women, whose names escaped him at he moment. He absently rubbed the back of his head where it still ached. Two days ago, the party had left Guadosalam, and began the journey to Moonflow. Tidus had occupied his time by telling Rikku, Yuna, and anyone who would listen, stories about Zanarkand. When he was not talking, he was busy trying to get Yuna’s attention. By the end of the first day, even the easy-going Wakka was running out of patience.
That night Tidus had asked Yuna if she had liked kissing Seymour, or him. For some reason, this question upset Yuna. So, he asked her about the night at the Spring. Auron’s hand connected with the back of his head in a slap that sent his hair flying. “Ouuuuch!”
“Keep your stupidity to yourself!”
“Hey, I was …!” Slap! “I was just…!“ Slap!
“I’m…gonna shut up now.“ Tidus mumbled cautiously, incase this was the wrong answer. When no Hand of Justice appeared to smite him, he moved to sit in a safer place, namely next to Rikku, who, according to his sympathy radar, was the perfect choice.
The next day was no better. Lulu had given Tidus a Look when he tried to start a conversation with her, and Kimahri had growled at him, so he had hung back with Rikku and Yuna, who where much more friendly, Yuna, having forgiven him. Auron and Wakka walked ahead of the group, Lulu close behind them. Wakka groaned as the cries of “Look at me!”, “Look what I can do!”, and “Hey girls, watch this!” started up again.
“Does he have an ‘off’ switch?” Wakka complained.
“I could call up another freak thunder storm.” Lulu graciously offered. “Don’t get me wrong. I like the kid and everything, but he just keeps going!”
“He does tend to over do things.” Auron said.
“Jeez, I’m almost afraid to turn around.” Wakka said as Tidus got ready for another stunt.
“Sweet Yevon!” Lulu gasped. “He’s going to do a Jecth shot on dry land! He‘s going to kill himself.”
She turned to Auron and Wakka in horror. Both men exchanged glances and Auron said quietly, “Lets get a little closer. I don’t want to miss this.” Lulu looked beseeching at the sky, silently asking Yevon why she was being tormented, as the guys turned to watch the spectacle.
“Kimahri says 50 gil, small one breaks head.”
“Okay,” Wakka said. “50 gil that he makes the shot and survives, ya? What about you Auron?” The veteran Guardian was silent for a moment.
“50 gil that he makes it and lives, but he makes a shoopuff‘s rear of himself.” Satisfied with their bets, the three of them watched with renewed interest as Tidus proceeded with his trick.
Tidus jumped into the air, spinning like a top, and lashed out at the blitz ball. The shot went wonderfully and Tidus made an Olympic level landing, grinning as the blitz ball flew through the air. The grin was replaced by a grimace and terrified gulp as the ball flew right into the big blue Ronso’s face, snapping his head back. Yuna and Rikku paused in mid-clap and stared at Kimarhi as his eyes blazed red. By the time Yuna and Rikku looked back at Tidus, he was kicking up a nice trail of dust.
Kimahri snarled, scooping up the blitz ball and stuffing it into his mouth, he charged on all fours after the blond boy. Tidus let out a satisfying ‘eep’ and put on a final burst of speed. Gaining rapidly, Kimahri reared up and tossed the ball into the air. When it came down he slammed his large fist into with all his might, sending it screaming right for Tidus. “Here we go.” Auron said, sounding excited as the ball rocketed into the back of Tidus’ head. Yuna gasped in horror and glared at Auron, as the ball struck Tidus and knocked him off his feet.
“Oh, he killed him!” Rikku shrieked. Auron nodded and Wakka handed him 50 gil, then slowly followed Yuna and Rikku as they ran to where Tidus lay motionless. He still needed to collect from the Ronso. As punishment, Yuna commanded Kimahri to carry Tidus. She would have used a curative on him, but Auron had quickly pointed out that they were low on Mana and Potions.
Auron sighed in exasperation and glanced sourly over his shoulder at Kimahri. Tidus, hanging around his neck by and arm and a leg like an ugly boa, had finally come around and was complaining about everything. The sun was too bright, the light hurt his eyes, Kimahri smelled, the sounds were too loud, his head hurt, and so on. Kimahri looked down at Auron. “You want Kimahri to hit again?” Wakka looked at Auron with a hopeful expression.
“Kimahri,” Yuna chided, “Don’t joke around like that.”
“Kimahri try.” he rumbled apologetically to Wakka as Yuna fell back from the lead to walk beside Tidus and ask how he felt. This brought on another barrage of whining.
“We’re almost there.” Yuna soothed, patting his arm. “I’ll ask Auron if we can take another break soon.” She jogged ahead to catch up with Auron and everyone took a break.
A few hours later, they were back on the road, marching along in silence. Yuna, walking a little behind Wakka, who had taken the lead, stumbled over a tree root snaking across the path. Without thinking, Kimahri dumped his burden on the ground and ran to put a steadying arm under Yuna’s hand. Tidus groaned as Auron and Lulu lifted him to his feet while Rikku hovered around anxiously. He muttered something in a slurred, dreamy voice.
“What?” Lulu asked, looking to Auron.
“I think he said ‘knockers’.” Auron replied. Tidus giggled.
“Whatever that means.” Lulu said, handing Tidus over to Rikku.
“It must be some Zanarkand word, ya?” Wakka said, coming over see if Tidus was alright.
“Sure…” Auron said uncomfortably, knowing full well what the Zanarkand word was for. “Uh…Lets get going. And so after a night spent by the road they arrived at the Moonflow, stumbling onto the platform of the shoopuf ferry.
“Phew!” Wakka gasped, waving a hand in front of his nose. “That thing stinks!” he looked around at his companions in confusion as they snickered and hurried towards the shoopuff. “What?
What? What’s up with all of y..ewwwww!” Shoopuff poop!” he frantically dragged his foot, smearing the still warm manure around the platform.
“Hurry up, Wakka.” Auron called from the elevation platform, still chuckling.
“Please. Stay on that side.” Lulu said, pushing Wakka towards the opposite end of the ferry. Auron looked at Kimahri, who stood beside him, supporting a limp Tidus.
“What’s taking them so long?” he asked in regards to Yuna and Rikku, who had gone to the Item Shop as soon as the party had entered the Moonflow.
The big Ronso shrugged, then glowered as the Hypello operator approached, waving a webbed hand to get their attention. “Be careful on Mushroom Rock Road, if yoo ish going that way.” he said “The road ish crowded becaush of an inveshtigation.”
“What investigation?” Wakka asked, glancing at his companions, all of whom had the same questions in their eyes. The Hypello lowered the boarding platform for Yuna and Rikku, and responded,
“The Crushadors found what looksh like a cave hidden near their headquartersh. They are looking into it-what did he shay?” the blue creature inquired in regards to Tidus’ mumble.
“It sounded like ‘Den of Hoes’.” Wakka replied uncertainly.
“What’s that?” Lulu asked.
“I don’t know, never heard of it.” Wakka shrugged dismissively.
“Let’s get going, then.” Auron said as Yuna and Rikku climbed aboard. Rikku threw an Al Bhed potion on Tidus, who was soon as good as new.
Moonflow, South Bank - Yuna and Company have just disembarked.
“Well, that wasn’t so bad.” Rikku commented as she and Lulu stepped off the platform, Yuna beside her. “At least not for us.” she added as she looked over her shoulder at Kimahri, whose fur was matted with whatever had been in Wakka’s stomach. The Ronso did not wait for the lift to reach the shoopuff’s back, he just leapt down, nearly landing on top of Tidus, who squeaked and fell into Wakka, who blew chunks on both of them. Auron emerged unscathed, at least until Tidus, in a bit of petty revenge, tackled Auron and gave him a big, messy hug.
“Boys,” Lulu said disgust, and with a flip of her hair left the shoopuff terminal, the Summoner and Rikku in tow.
Oh, and here are the next two chapters of A Random Adventure and a link to Ch 1 & 2.
A Random Adventure Ch 1 & 2
Title: A Random Adventure Ch 3 & 4
Canon: FFX OGC
Characters/Parings: Tidus, Cast
Rating: T
Summary: Yuna and her Guardians contiune their journey back to Besaid after a ceremony in Bevelle. The companions learn an interesting tidbit about Auron and the Farplane.
A/N: Humor and possible Spoilers
A Random Adventure
Setting: Yuna and her Guardians are returning to Besaid after attending a ceremony celebrating the induction of the newest junior monks at Macalania Temple. They have decided to rest at the Spring in the woods.
CHAPTER 3
Guadosalam - Noon. Yuna and company are taking a lunch break.
“I didn’t think we’d ever get out of the Thunder Plains!” Tidus exclaimed, around a mouthful of fish. Lulu smiled into her cup of tea and Auron’s shoulders shook suspiciously.
“Too much lightning?” he asked with barely contained mirth.
“I’ve never seen a storm like that.” Yuna said, a small pondering frown on her face,“It was very odd.”
Auron grunted, “Very odd indeed.” Lulu giggled into her tea and quickly said,
“I never knew you were such a talented dancer, Tidus.”
“Traitor!” Tidus muttered as Yuna giggled along with everyone else.
“Tidus very quick, like small lemming.” Kimahri remarked, giving Tidus a friendly slap (and a fresh bruise) on the shoulder.
“You know,” Yuna said, cleaning up the remains of her lunch. “I heard from the Senior monk that the Farplane has become unstable since we defeated Sin. Should we look into it?” There was an awkward silence for a moment and everyone looked at Auron.
“Don’t let me stop you.” he rumbled, taking a draught from his sake jar.
“Maybe some other time.” Rikku said with false indifference and a nervous giggle.
“But what if it’s a danger to others, you know?” Wakka pondered. “What if fiends pour out and …”
“Just drop it Wakka.” Tidus said, suddenly solemn. Auron rolled his eye over the rim of his glasses. Yep. The boy was looking at him with that sad puppy face.
“Stop it. I don’t need any of your pity.”
Tidus frowned and the arguing stopped. Auron rose and straightened his robe. “I can take care of myself. Lets get going.”
“Stubborn old man.” Tidus murmured as Auron stalked out of the Inn.
“He doesn’t want us to feel like we have to protect him or feel sorry for him, ya?” Wakka said ruffling Tidus hair.
“Ya.” Tidus replied, twitching a smile.
“Here we go.” Yuna said moving up the steps. She had suggested that Auron stand guard at the bottom of the steps, just in case anything got past them. Of course, he had seen right through her attempt to keep him out of danger. He had smiled and stayed at the bottom of the stairs, which surprised the back up argument right out of her.
“That was too easy, ya?” Wakka whispered to Lulu, with a backward glance down the stairs. Lulu nodded and entered the Farplane.
“So many pyre-flies.” Yuna gasped as thousands swarmed energetically around them.
“They seem agitated - Ack!” Tidus stumbled backwards as Seymour suddenly appeared in front of him. “Alright,” he demanded “Who was thinking about Seymour?” Everyone looked at Yuna. She gasped indignantly,
“It wasn’t me!”
“Sorry,” Rikku said meekly. “They kinda go together. You can’t think about the creepy Farplane without thinking about creepy Seymour.” Wakka rolled his eyes, Tidus shook his head, Lulu and Yuna both groaned, and Kimahri remained silent.
“Lets get on with this.” Lulu sighed in exasperation, turning to continue on. She stopped short and choked on a yelp as she was confronted with Auron. “Alright,” She called over her shoulder in irritation. “Who was thinking about the old guy?”
“It’s me.” Auron stalked past Lulu who sputtered in embarrassment. She turned, slack-jawed as everyone snickered.
“I told you it was too easy, Lu.” Wakka said with a sigh as Auron rejoined the group.
Pyre-flies swarmed angrily around them, their small comet-like forms whizzing and darting. There was none of the gentle meandering wafting that they usually displayed. Auron grunted and fell to one knee, pyre-flies leaving his body. “Auron!” Yuna cried, drawing everyone’s attention. Tidus and Kimahri, being closest, lifted him to his feet (Although Tidus was mostly a bystander as Kimahri lifted him one handed).
“Come on old man, pull yourself together. You’re falling apart…er, drifting away.” Tidus stammered. Auron rolled his eye at the boy as the pyre-flies massed a few feet away from them. Auron grunted and glared at the pyre-flies. After a few moments he became a little more solid and shook off Kimahri’s helping hand. Odd, the Unsent Guardian thought. Something was different; wrong. But what?
Auron suddenly realized that everyone was looking at him, and he got the impression that they were trying not to laugh. He looked down at himself. Ah. That was it. Auron’s pants were gone, replaced instead by a skimpy pair of shorts, which did nothing to cover his manly legs. “I know that was you,“ he snarled, pointing an accusing finger at Tidus, who was trying to look innocent.
“Ummm…nice legs?” he replied, shaking with retained laughter.
Auron heard Rikku giggle. He looked down at himself again, dreading what he might see. “It’s not my color.” he commented dryly as he scowled at he blue lacy dress he was wearing. “And blond hair doesn’t suit me.” he added as knee-length hair cascaded over his shoulders. “And those just don’t belong.” he snarled.
“Look!” Tidus crowed, “Auron has knockers!”
“Hey! “ Rikku giggled “That looks much better!” She burst into fits of giggles with Yuna and Lulu. Tidus outright guffawed, and Kimahri made the chuffing sound that did him for a laugh.
“Hey, what about this, guys?” Tidus asked between gasps as Auron acquired a pair of bandy-kneed Hypello legs.
Auron stood fuming as the Spawn of Jecht took full advantage of his status as Unsent. It was the one thing he had hoped that they would never figure out, the pyre-flies could be used to manipulate his appearance. It sucked, but it was true. Auron suddenly felt a lot colder for some reason. A reason that rapidly became hideously clear as Yuna and Rikku screamed and covered their faces, Kimahri leaping to shield them from the terrible sight. Lulu quickly turned her back while Wakka doubled over laughing and Tidus whistled tauntingly. All of Auron’s clothes were gone, leaving only his sake jar hanging in a strategic place.
Tidus gave Wakka a high-five and collapsed on the ground, laughing. “I couldn’t resist!” Wakka crowed, holding his sides.
“ENOUGH!” Auron took control of his form as the last echoes bounced into silence. “Now,” he said straightening his coat, letting his burning gaze sweep over his companions, all of them at least having the decency to look ashamed. “If you are all finished making a chocobo’s rear out of me…don’t even think about it!” he said to Tidus, who whistled quietly to himself and suddenly found the sky profoundly interesting. “As I was saying, let’s do what we came here to do: Make sure this place is safe.”
Later, Auron realized that perhaps they all should have just left. Maybe he should not have reminded them why they were there. No sooner than he had reminded the group of the purpose of their visit to the Farplane, than the fiends had appeared. And of course they had to be the biggest, scariest ones. One Spectral Keeper, a Yunalesca (in all three forms, of course), a Behemoth King, one Braska’s Ultimate Summon, not one, but two Evraes, and a giant cat (courtesy of Tidus).
This last fiend proved extremely difficult to defeat. This was due to the fact that Tidus kept ‘adding’ to it, as his imagination went on a dangerous “What if..” spree. It did not help matters when Tidus helpfully suggested that Yuna summon Valefor. Auron could have throttled him right then and there, forget the fiend. Poor Valefor looked sufficiently like a bird, and Giant Cat had chased her all over the Farplane. Yuna’s quick thinking was the only thing that saved the Aeon from becoming a Giant Cat snack. Ifrit was a much more effective choice.
Once all of the fiends were taken care of, the exhausted party relaxed. “Don’t anybody even think about thinking!” Wakka said quickly, pointing to Tidus. “Especially you!” Tidus shook his head solemnly and replied
“Don’t worry. My mind’s a blank-Owwwww!” Tidus rubbed his skull where an irate Valefor had just landed a sharp peck.
“I…she…she bit me!” Tidus exclaimed as the Aeon was dismissed.
“I’d bite you too.” was all Auron said as he turned to lead the companions out of the Farplane. Tidus grumbled and rubbed the back of his head where Valefor had bitten him. Okay, so maybe he had deserved that. Poor Valefor did look an awful lot like a bird.
CHAPTER 4
Moonflow, North Bank - Yuna and company have just arrived at the shoopuff ferry. It is early morning.
Tidus plodded along in a daze, supported on either side by two beautiful women, whose names escaped him at he moment. He absently rubbed the back of his head where it still ached. Two days ago, the party had left Guadosalam, and began the journey to Moonflow. Tidus had occupied his time by telling Rikku, Yuna, and anyone who would listen, stories about Zanarkand. When he was not talking, he was busy trying to get Yuna’s attention. By the end of the first day, even the easy-going Wakka was running out of patience.
That night Tidus had asked Yuna if she had liked kissing Seymour, or him. For some reason, this question upset Yuna. So, he asked her about the night at the Spring. Auron’s hand connected with the back of his head in a slap that sent his hair flying. “Ouuuuch!”
“Keep your stupidity to yourself!”
“Hey, I was …!” Slap! “I was just…!“ Slap!
“I’m…gonna shut up now.“ Tidus mumbled cautiously, incase this was the wrong answer. When no Hand of Justice appeared to smite him, he moved to sit in a safer place, namely next to Rikku, who, according to his sympathy radar, was the perfect choice.
The next day was no better. Lulu had given Tidus a Look when he tried to start a conversation with her, and Kimahri had growled at him, so he had hung back with Rikku and Yuna, who where much more friendly, Yuna, having forgiven him. Auron and Wakka walked ahead of the group, Lulu close behind them. Wakka groaned as the cries of “Look at me!”, “Look what I can do!”, and “Hey girls, watch this!” started up again.
“Does he have an ‘off’ switch?” Wakka complained.
“I could call up another freak thunder storm.” Lulu graciously offered. “Don’t get me wrong. I like the kid and everything, but he just keeps going!”
“He does tend to over do things.” Auron said.
“Jeez, I’m almost afraid to turn around.” Wakka said as Tidus got ready for another stunt.
“Sweet Yevon!” Lulu gasped. “He’s going to do a Jecth shot on dry land! He‘s going to kill himself.”
She turned to Auron and Wakka in horror. Both men exchanged glances and Auron said quietly, “Lets get a little closer. I don’t want to miss this.” Lulu looked beseeching at the sky, silently asking Yevon why she was being tormented, as the guys turned to watch the spectacle.
“Kimahri says 50 gil, small one breaks head.”
“Okay,” Wakka said. “50 gil that he makes the shot and survives, ya? What about you Auron?” The veteran Guardian was silent for a moment.
“50 gil that he makes it and lives, but he makes a shoopuff‘s rear of himself.” Satisfied with their bets, the three of them watched with renewed interest as Tidus proceeded with his trick.
Tidus jumped into the air, spinning like a top, and lashed out at the blitz ball. The shot went wonderfully and Tidus made an Olympic level landing, grinning as the blitz ball flew through the air. The grin was replaced by a grimace and terrified gulp as the ball flew right into the big blue Ronso’s face, snapping his head back. Yuna and Rikku paused in mid-clap and stared at Kimarhi as his eyes blazed red. By the time Yuna and Rikku looked back at Tidus, he was kicking up a nice trail of dust.
Kimahri snarled, scooping up the blitz ball and stuffing it into his mouth, he charged on all fours after the blond boy. Tidus let out a satisfying ‘eep’ and put on a final burst of speed. Gaining rapidly, Kimahri reared up and tossed the ball into the air. When it came down he slammed his large fist into with all his might, sending it screaming right for Tidus. “Here we go.” Auron said, sounding excited as the ball rocketed into the back of Tidus’ head. Yuna gasped in horror and glared at Auron, as the ball struck Tidus and knocked him off his feet.
“Oh, he killed him!” Rikku shrieked. Auron nodded and Wakka handed him 50 gil, then slowly followed Yuna and Rikku as they ran to where Tidus lay motionless. He still needed to collect from the Ronso. As punishment, Yuna commanded Kimahri to carry Tidus. She would have used a curative on him, but Auron had quickly pointed out that they were low on Mana and Potions.
Auron sighed in exasperation and glanced sourly over his shoulder at Kimahri. Tidus, hanging around his neck by and arm and a leg like an ugly boa, had finally come around and was complaining about everything. The sun was too bright, the light hurt his eyes, Kimahri smelled, the sounds were too loud, his head hurt, and so on. Kimahri looked down at Auron. “You want Kimahri to hit again?” Wakka looked at Auron with a hopeful expression.
“Kimahri,” Yuna chided, “Don’t joke around like that.”
“Kimahri try.” he rumbled apologetically to Wakka as Yuna fell back from the lead to walk beside Tidus and ask how he felt. This brought on another barrage of whining.
“We’re almost there.” Yuna soothed, patting his arm. “I’ll ask Auron if we can take another break soon.” She jogged ahead to catch up with Auron and everyone took a break.
A few hours later, they were back on the road, marching along in silence. Yuna, walking a little behind Wakka, who had taken the lead, stumbled over a tree root snaking across the path. Without thinking, Kimahri dumped his burden on the ground and ran to put a steadying arm under Yuna’s hand. Tidus groaned as Auron and Lulu lifted him to his feet while Rikku hovered around anxiously. He muttered something in a slurred, dreamy voice.
“What?” Lulu asked, looking to Auron.
“I think he said ‘knockers’.” Auron replied. Tidus giggled.
“Whatever that means.” Lulu said, handing Tidus over to Rikku.
“It must be some Zanarkand word, ya?” Wakka said, coming over see if Tidus was alright.
“Sure…” Auron said uncomfortably, knowing full well what the Zanarkand word was for. “Uh…Lets get going. And so after a night spent by the road they arrived at the Moonflow, stumbling onto the platform of the shoopuf ferry.
“Phew!” Wakka gasped, waving a hand in front of his nose. “That thing stinks!” he looked around at his companions in confusion as they snickered and hurried towards the shoopuff. “What?
What? What’s up with all of y..ewwwww!” Shoopuff poop!” he frantically dragged his foot, smearing the still warm manure around the platform.
“Hurry up, Wakka.” Auron called from the elevation platform, still chuckling.
“Please. Stay on that side.” Lulu said, pushing Wakka towards the opposite end of the ferry. Auron looked at Kimahri, who stood beside him, supporting a limp Tidus.
“What’s taking them so long?” he asked in regards to Yuna and Rikku, who had gone to the Item Shop as soon as the party had entered the Moonflow.
The big Ronso shrugged, then glowered as the Hypello operator approached, waving a webbed hand to get their attention. “Be careful on Mushroom Rock Road, if yoo ish going that way.” he said “The road ish crowded becaush of an inveshtigation.”
“What investigation?” Wakka asked, glancing at his companions, all of whom had the same questions in their eyes. The Hypello lowered the boarding platform for Yuna and Rikku, and responded,
“The Crushadors found what looksh like a cave hidden near their headquartersh. They are looking into it-what did he shay?” the blue creature inquired in regards to Tidus’ mumble.
“It sounded like ‘Den of Hoes’.” Wakka replied uncertainly.
“What’s that?” Lulu asked.
“I don’t know, never heard of it.” Wakka shrugged dismissively.
“Let’s get going, then.” Auron said as Yuna and Rikku climbed aboard. Rikku threw an Al Bhed potion on Tidus, who was soon as good as new.
Moonflow, South Bank - Yuna and Company have just disembarked.
“Well, that wasn’t so bad.” Rikku commented as she and Lulu stepped off the platform, Yuna beside her. “At least not for us.” she added as she looked over her shoulder at Kimahri, whose fur was matted with whatever had been in Wakka’s stomach. The Ronso did not wait for the lift to reach the shoopuff’s back, he just leapt down, nearly landing on top of Tidus, who squeaked and fell into Wakka, who blew chunks on both of them. Auron emerged unscathed, at least until Tidus, in a bit of petty revenge, tackled Auron and gave him a big, messy hug.
“Boys,” Lulu said disgust, and with a flip of her hair left the shoopuff terminal, the Summoner and Rikku in tow.