(no subject)
I've been wondering about self-forgiveness for some time. Ya know, my faith rests on the trust that God forgives anything - as long as we ask, and as long as we are honest. My friend Reinhardt says that this is true, except for haughtiness - God does not forgive haughtiness. I've often been haughty in some ways. Haughty and vain. This is where I go back to Solomon - Solomon knew this also, that anything's vanity, except when the Lord makes it known to you that it's ok for now. Life is frustrating at times, but when do we make it harder than we ought to? Ya know, Jesus says that those who want to follow Him have to deny themselves. But what exactly is meant by such self-denial? What if it doesn't seem successful? This whole thing with being selfless ... is it good even when it can't be done properly? Or was Jesus' commandment to deny ourselves again one of those things the Lord speaks to kindle zealotry, until zealotry's gone and ya have to see again that all salvation comes by God's grace. I guess many of us got a whiff sometimes of what it means to be in Job's shoes. And that, like Job, we have to learn to shut our mouth because we cannot possibly understand - even when we might comprehend. The bible is awfully simple, one of its key sentences is this: "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and appreciating of His Holy One, is understanding." This seems vastly different from a scientific view of understanding, understanding as in understanding a difficulty and working with it. And what about loving God? Is it possible, entirely possible to love the Lord as wholesomely as scripture demands? Or is this another of those things God asks us to try so that we, again, see that God loves us while we did not? I'm always so surprised, but there is always such simplicity in God.
Can someone relate to me? Do ya forgive yourself? With sins I gotta go to the Lord, it seems, but with mistakes I need a human to speak esteem to me, or myself to treat lightly. After all, even Apostle Paul said that he does not judge himself.
I hope what I'm doing is finally getting to the freedom of the Saint. That there is no condemnation in Christ.
love and clarity,
Daniel
Can someone relate to me? Do ya forgive yourself? With sins I gotta go to the Lord, it seems, but with mistakes I need a human to speak esteem to me, or myself to treat lightly. After all, even Apostle Paul said that he does not judge himself.
I hope what I'm doing is finally getting to the freedom of the Saint. That there is no condemnation in Christ.
love and clarity,
Daniel