Why do I spend so much time on the computer or tv?
Big three:
1) I like watching people grow and change. I like drama and comedy and watching other people have fun and enjoying life.
2) I daze off into situational thinking, depression, heavy nostalgia, blame, disgust, want, and et cetera any time away from something that just eats away at time. In the past thirty minutes, I spent 1/3rd of the time actually raking and the other 2/3rds walking around in circles thinking about old friends, How proud I am of them, why I close myself off, my biggest flaws, what I need to do to go, excuses for why I don't take those steps, rationalization of and against various fears that give rise to the excuses, need to see a therapist or take medication again, desire to do so requires money, employment requires therapy or confidence or work ethic or all, good employment requires money, stability, and a vehicle, vehicle requires money and asking for help, I could've been driving since sixteen, I don't ask for a permit because I don't know how often I'd actually use it and don't want to pay for it because I don't have money which I need a job for which I'd need to drive to, I need to get laid, I can't talk to DJ still or try Brandon, I regret not going to Niki's wedding, my top ten regrets, various points on why I should keep raking, and probably about 200 dozen other things including schooling, women, masculinity, ambition, what women want, what I want, raking for my parents in twenty years, five years gone, what was going on ten years ago, and "What's the alternative".
3) I get the false sense of doing something when I'm really just sitting in one place for an extended period of time.
1) I like watching people grow and change. I like drama and comedy and watching other people have fun and enjoying life.
2) I daze off into situational thinking, depression, heavy nostalgia, blame, disgust, want, and et cetera any time away from something that just eats away at time. In the past thirty minutes, I spent 1/3rd of the time actually raking and the other 2/3rds walking around in circles thinking about old friends, How proud I am of them, why I close myself off, my biggest flaws, what I need to do to go, excuses for why I don't take those steps, rationalization of and against various fears that give rise to the excuses, need to see a therapist or take medication again, desire to do so requires money, employment requires therapy or confidence or work ethic or all, good employment requires money, stability, and a vehicle, vehicle requires money and asking for help, I could've been driving since sixteen, I don't ask for a permit because I don't know how often I'd actually use it and don't want to pay for it because I don't have money which I need a job for which I'd need to drive to, I need to get laid, I can't talk to DJ still or try Brandon, I regret not going to Niki's wedding, my top ten regrets, various points on why I should keep raking, and probably about 200 dozen other things including schooling, women, masculinity, ambition, what women want, what I want, raking for my parents in twenty years, five years gone, what was going on ten years ago, and "What's the alternative".
3) I get the false sense of doing something when I'm really just sitting in one place for an extended period of time.