Anxiety

[nanaki_muyo]

So, that whole working on being more sociable thing? Yeah, didn't work. I actually ended up backsliding quite a bit around the end of the year due to school stress and being far less busy than my friends. The busier my friends got, the lonelier I got. Started getting depressed and losing motivation again. Started getting anxiety attacks in loud,

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[nanaki_muyo]

I've also been realizing how many little things I do, or my body does, that are a direct result of my anxiety. Regardless of the temperature in the room/outside Being surrounded by people I don't know almost always makes my armpits sweat profusely. I always thought I was just a heavy sweater, but I've been noticing that I don't sweat much around friends or by myself (been doing that one a lot lately), only at work/school. I don't tell many people this (...because it's embarrassing), but probably my single greatest fear is having people think negatively about me. There's been a million times at FFWA/Krap where I've gone into one of the argument threads and either: wanted to post something but didn't, wrote out a lengthy post but decided not to post it, or posted a biting comment and refused to look at the thread again for at least a few days. I never raise my hand in class unless I'm absolutely positive I know the answer and nobody else seems to. It was 2 years at UNLV before I worked up the nerve to go see a professor in his office. I

[nanaki_muyo]

lol rambling post is rambly!