Offer Me the Stars - a Secret Diary of a Call girl x doctor Who crossover
Title : Offer Me the Stars
Author : Seven Nana
Characters : Belle from Secret Diary of a Call-Girl & 9th Doctor from Doctor Who
Rating : G, I guess
Summary : A crossover between Doctor Who and Secret Diary of a Call-Girl, just for my pleasure and maybe yours ?
NOTE : It's the first time that I wrote in english ! I would really appreciate beta's help ? Feel free to ask me my e-mail. I accept any assistance. Thanks ♥
---
A lot of things happening at night.
While you lay in your bed, while you fall asleep in front of your screen, us, the girls of night, the whores, we give our nectar to the men who don’t want to sleep. We are invited at the best dinners, we taste the finer wine, we live the greater moments during sex. But we also live the scariest moments of our whole life and sometimes, hopefully rarely, we finish in a sea of sheets with severed throat. A really awful death.
A pimp should supervise clients we are receiving, but I started to thought that mine doesn’t know how do her job, because two of my colleagues were moved from their bed to a table in a mortuary. From now on I know what the poor prostitutes have felt when Jack the Ripper ran in London. But our century is bygone : even prices can’t stop raving lunatics. Since those troubles, clients don’t able to remain anonymous anymore, they must call twice with the same number and I could talk with them before the meeting. Of course, their ardour got cold and we lost some regular visitors.
And yesterday, I saw a lot of strange things too.
Night has just fallen and a man called me two hours before, explaining his soft tendencies. I couldn’t satisfied my previous client, during the after-noon. Then for me, it was a chance. So, I surpassed myself, wearing the most sensual underthings and clean up my flat. Crossed legs, arched breast, I was waiting on the edge of the mattress covered of silk and condoms. But ten minutes before my piper’s coming, I heard a really strange noise : like the strangled wind, like a machine which dying. I tried to muffle the sound of my stiletto-heels on the parquet, totally scared.
You can trust me if I say that I lived many weird situations : I was already almost naked in my bathroom with a stranger, but never that stranger went out from a big blue box stuck between my toilet and my shower. He seemed so joyful, maybe nice but he was sort of offbeat too with this black jacket. The man smiled and said hello.
"What are you doing here ?!"
No, I didn’t said that… In fact, the surprise rendered me unbelievably idiot at first…
"Are… Are you my client ?"
"I don’t think so."
I felt ashamed of blushing : he looked at me, in my ivory panties but seemed most intrigued by my cosmetics, the fashion magazine near the toilet. The situation was totally a mess.
"So… Who the hell are you ? And why are you in my bathroom ?!"
"I’m the Doctor."
"Doctor who ?"
"Just the Doctor. And you? Why are you there ?"
He frowned and I couldn’t believe how serious he was although the burlesque scene. But I was still astonished and answered, always perched on my high heels : a naked woman in a common discussion. Awful, isn’t it ?
"I live here. And I’m Belle."
I paused.
"Doctor is not your real name, right ?"
"As Belle wasn’t yours, right ?"
I tried to laugh, but I couldn’t. The Doctor still smiling and I couldn’t remember, for a moment, why I was waiting in my room with only my skin as clothes. Honestly, he was not what I called handsome, but he was not fearsome either, maybe a bit of good-looking or cute especially when he’s smiling.
"What is this blue box doing here…? I mean, what is it exacl--"
The sound of knocking bring me back to the reality ; the customer was here. I jumped and started to panic : what should I do, now ? First, got out the intruder. Second, forgot everything. Not too simple with this Doctor.
"Doctor, you can’t stay here, you must--"
"Belle, don’t leave the bathroom, there’s a Pijistrol on your doorstep !"
It was a joke. I thought it was certainly a joke. But the Doctor seemed so serious again. Then he left the bathroom with in his hand a tiny metallic torch which throw an azure light. I followed him and watched the door locking itself. Yes, the door locked itself when the light gleaming the bolt !
"What are you doing ?"
"He mustn’t come here"
"No, you mustn’t be here !" I remarked.
I heard the Doctor’s sigh while I was angry and defenceless. After all, I didn’t know him and I felt like in a nightmare, when everything got out of your control and you can’t believe what your own eyes see. And the waking up doesn’t come. I grabbed my cell phone, one word, one name rolling in my head : Ben. I needed his help.
I pushed on the green button.
"I’m calling my friend, right now !"
I thought that the man would have jumped on me, would have hit me, would have broke my phone. But no, he put his hands up, showed me that he was totally harmless and guiltless. His voice, earlier fast and cheerful, at this moment was so soft and calm. And suddenly, I saw fear in his teal eyes. Dread painted a dark veil inside these old eyes, strangely old.
"Belle, please : there is a creature, outside, a dangerous creature who wants just one thing : your life. Don’t call a friend and expose him in danger. Please. I know that sounds really improbable for you, but you have to believe me now. Please."
Time running out and I started to cry when I heard Ben’s voice in the phone. But I pushed on the red button without a word. No smile appeared on Doctor’s face again, though I nodded. The man, the creature has surely heard some noises and knocking again, faster. The Doctor put a finger in front of his lips and begged me to hide myself, not in the bathroom, not in the room. So I glided under the table in the kitchen and waited.
I’m not sure of what I saw exactly from this hideout. The door opened and my client went in, displaying an astonished face. At first, I thought he could be a real gentleman : an elegant profile, a calm gait and good manners. Yes, I had a slight crush on him, but it was so short. What exactly happened ? I don’t know. Hatred drew his lines : his ears and his chin became pointed, his spine creaked and bent. The sophisticated man turned into the awful beast. My hands squeezed my head as I closed my eyes, harder and harder, hoping to chase away the drumming of my heart. Some chewed words, maybe a guttural growl and the refrain of fear under my throat. The bustle flowed in the distance, further from me, like a ghost. But I still stayed curled up, burying my nose between my knees.
I couldn’t contain the hysterical scream when fingers taped my wrist. I fell backward and saw the Doctor, a smile upon his lips. During a few seconds, I imagined that the graceful devil was a bad dream. I discerned an odd fluffy thing nearly the entry, unable to put a name on. But the Doctor answered before I could open my mouth.
"I told you : he was a Pijistrol, an alien from Dujero which is, well, from here, I would say 1 hour and 42 minutes at light speed maybe."
"Really ?"
I smirked.
"Yes."
He still grinned, not as he said a joke, rather because he could spoken at last about unusual things and noteworthy passions : I think he really enjoyed sharing universes’ secrets, offered answers to my human’s questions. Then, he added :
"I’m sorry : I rummaged in your dirty linen basket and used a sock. The Pijistrols really dislike smell of sweat and pass out every time, for a long, long time. The last woman, in 1888, had a great idea to strangled him with an old cloth !"
I blushed but laughed when I saw the sock. I laughed again because he spoke too fast and, even now, I’m not sure of what I heard.
"Which woman in 1888 ? What do you mean ?"
"It was the same man that humans named « Jack the Ripper », after killing Mary Jane Kelly, he tried again, but Elizabeth Perry succeeded to defend herself. He slept since that failure. Now, I’ll bring him back to Dujero where he will be judged in his own world. That why he seems so distinguished, women get trapped, charmed by him."
I stopped smiling and began to really listen to him, listen as a child front his father, a pupil and his teacher. Maybe it was fear’s fault, but at this moment, I believed the Doctor.
"That man was the man who killed some whores in 1888 ? It is really the same man ?"
"Nearly five women, yes."
Under the surprise, I gasped. I didn’t feel my own indolent body, had a fancy that everything was a quixotic dream. I took a deep interest in the Doctor and this ludicrous and lovely blue box in my bathroom again, I guessed.
"You’re not an human ?"
"Not at all."
He seemed too proud when he claimed his alien nature. Then I pointed bathroom’s door, curiosity still dissatisfied.
"And this police box is a sort of… Ship ? A spaceship ?"
"Her name is the Tardis, which mean time and relative dimensions in space."
I chuckled, suspected him to had to say that a million times, also because he believed that his spacecraft was a girl.
"I didn’t know that spaceships was so small !"
"It's bigger on the inside."
Suddenly, the Doctor reacted as very outraged but I kept giggled loudly. Still euphoric, I went back where the Tardis waiting. She was dressed with midnight blue, deep colour which reminded me the sky at night. My hand caressed the painted wood yet common. In fact, from outside, it was an old police box without any interest. But inside, I saw through the half-open door a real control panel surrounded by cobalt and amber lights were like stars. The Doctor told me that the Tardis could travelled in space and in time : he can go around the most faraway planets, the most old moments of the Earth, in the darker corners of the universe or in the contrary, the brighter…
"Would you like to go on a little trip ?"
I beamed to him : it would be wonderful. I’m just a call-girl who lie to everyone around. For him, it doesn’t matter how I gain my life. I’m just a woman who cherish every life’s rarities. He could show me wild universe’s wealth and secrets. I’m just a person who can’t love a man. And he was more good-looking than before. Maybe I fancy him a bit.
But I couldn’t. I look at the Tardis for certainly the last time.
"I still can’t believe what I saw, tonight. I trust again that you must be a dream. A very, very weird and nice dream. But I can’t ; too many things hold me back here."
His smile persisted, but I noticed the acute and harrowing disappointment. At this moment, he looked like an old and so lonely man. Quickly, the Doctor regained his self-control and shrugged his shoulders : everything going to be alright, now.
Right before his departure, he asked my name.
"Hannah."
It was the last joy of the night. He began to set a foot in the blue box and saluted me.
"Goodbye, Belle."
"Goodbye, Doctor."
I was glad that he called me Belle even if he knew my real name. The wind blew ferociously around me, between four pity walls while the Tardis disappeared, like an illusion. Not Tardis any more, not Doctor any more, just the drab salmon wallpaper. I was so cold, I was so lonely, trying to understand the same Doctor’s painful emotions. Then, I positioned myself in front of a window in my room and waited.
But in the huge dark sky, I saw no flying blue box.
Author : Seven Nana
Characters : Belle from Secret Diary of a Call-Girl & 9th Doctor from Doctor Who
Rating : G, I guess
Summary : A crossover between Doctor Who and Secret Diary of a Call-Girl, just for my pleasure and maybe yours ?
NOTE : It's the first time that I wrote in english ! I would really appreciate beta's help ? Feel free to ask me my e-mail. I accept any assistance. Thanks ♥
---
A lot of things happening at night.
While you lay in your bed, while you fall asleep in front of your screen, us, the girls of night, the whores, we give our nectar to the men who don’t want to sleep. We are invited at the best dinners, we taste the finer wine, we live the greater moments during sex. But we also live the scariest moments of our whole life and sometimes, hopefully rarely, we finish in a sea of sheets with severed throat. A really awful death.
A pimp should supervise clients we are receiving, but I started to thought that mine doesn’t know how do her job, because two of my colleagues were moved from their bed to a table in a mortuary. From now on I know what the poor prostitutes have felt when Jack the Ripper ran in London. But our century is bygone : even prices can’t stop raving lunatics. Since those troubles, clients don’t able to remain anonymous anymore, they must call twice with the same number and I could talk with them before the meeting. Of course, their ardour got cold and we lost some regular visitors.
And yesterday, I saw a lot of strange things too.
Night has just fallen and a man called me two hours before, explaining his soft tendencies. I couldn’t satisfied my previous client, during the after-noon. Then for me, it was a chance. So, I surpassed myself, wearing the most sensual underthings and clean up my flat. Crossed legs, arched breast, I was waiting on the edge of the mattress covered of silk and condoms. But ten minutes before my piper’s coming, I heard a really strange noise : like the strangled wind, like a machine which dying. I tried to muffle the sound of my stiletto-heels on the parquet, totally scared.
You can trust me if I say that I lived many weird situations : I was already almost naked in my bathroom with a stranger, but never that stranger went out from a big blue box stuck between my toilet and my shower. He seemed so joyful, maybe nice but he was sort of offbeat too with this black jacket. The man smiled and said hello.
"What are you doing here ?!"
No, I didn’t said that… In fact, the surprise rendered me unbelievably idiot at first…
"Are… Are you my client ?"
"I don’t think so."
I felt ashamed of blushing : he looked at me, in my ivory panties but seemed most intrigued by my cosmetics, the fashion magazine near the toilet. The situation was totally a mess.
"So… Who the hell are you ? And why are you in my bathroom ?!"
"I’m the Doctor."
"Doctor who ?"
"Just the Doctor. And you? Why are you there ?"
He frowned and I couldn’t believe how serious he was although the burlesque scene. But I was still astonished and answered, always perched on my high heels : a naked woman in a common discussion. Awful, isn’t it ?
"I live here. And I’m Belle."
I paused.
"Doctor is not your real name, right ?"
"As Belle wasn’t yours, right ?"
I tried to laugh, but I couldn’t. The Doctor still smiling and I couldn’t remember, for a moment, why I was waiting in my room with only my skin as clothes. Honestly, he was not what I called handsome, but he was not fearsome either, maybe a bit of good-looking or cute especially when he’s smiling.
"What is this blue box doing here…? I mean, what is it exacl--"
The sound of knocking bring me back to the reality ; the customer was here. I jumped and started to panic : what should I do, now ? First, got out the intruder. Second, forgot everything. Not too simple with this Doctor.
"Doctor, you can’t stay here, you must--"
"Belle, don’t leave the bathroom, there’s a Pijistrol on your doorstep !"
It was a joke. I thought it was certainly a joke. But the Doctor seemed so serious again. Then he left the bathroom with in his hand a tiny metallic torch which throw an azure light. I followed him and watched the door locking itself. Yes, the door locked itself when the light gleaming the bolt !
"What are you doing ?"
"He mustn’t come here"
"No, you mustn’t be here !" I remarked.
I heard the Doctor’s sigh while I was angry and defenceless. After all, I didn’t know him and I felt like in a nightmare, when everything got out of your control and you can’t believe what your own eyes see. And the waking up doesn’t come. I grabbed my cell phone, one word, one name rolling in my head : Ben. I needed his help.
I pushed on the green button.
"I’m calling my friend, right now !"
I thought that the man would have jumped on me, would have hit me, would have broke my phone. But no, he put his hands up, showed me that he was totally harmless and guiltless. His voice, earlier fast and cheerful, at this moment was so soft and calm. And suddenly, I saw fear in his teal eyes. Dread painted a dark veil inside these old eyes, strangely old.
"Belle, please : there is a creature, outside, a dangerous creature who wants just one thing : your life. Don’t call a friend and expose him in danger. Please. I know that sounds really improbable for you, but you have to believe me now. Please."
Time running out and I started to cry when I heard Ben’s voice in the phone. But I pushed on the red button without a word. No smile appeared on Doctor’s face again, though I nodded. The man, the creature has surely heard some noises and knocking again, faster. The Doctor put a finger in front of his lips and begged me to hide myself, not in the bathroom, not in the room. So I glided under the table in the kitchen and waited.
I’m not sure of what I saw exactly from this hideout. The door opened and my client went in, displaying an astonished face. At first, I thought he could be a real gentleman : an elegant profile, a calm gait and good manners. Yes, I had a slight crush on him, but it was so short. What exactly happened ? I don’t know. Hatred drew his lines : his ears and his chin became pointed, his spine creaked and bent. The sophisticated man turned into the awful beast. My hands squeezed my head as I closed my eyes, harder and harder, hoping to chase away the drumming of my heart. Some chewed words, maybe a guttural growl and the refrain of fear under my throat. The bustle flowed in the distance, further from me, like a ghost. But I still stayed curled up, burying my nose between my knees.
I couldn’t contain the hysterical scream when fingers taped my wrist. I fell backward and saw the Doctor, a smile upon his lips. During a few seconds, I imagined that the graceful devil was a bad dream. I discerned an odd fluffy thing nearly the entry, unable to put a name on. But the Doctor answered before I could open my mouth.
"I told you : he was a Pijistrol, an alien from Dujero which is, well, from here, I would say 1 hour and 42 minutes at light speed maybe."
"Really ?"
I smirked.
"Yes."
He still grinned, not as he said a joke, rather because he could spoken at last about unusual things and noteworthy passions : I think he really enjoyed sharing universes’ secrets, offered answers to my human’s questions. Then, he added :
"I’m sorry : I rummaged in your dirty linen basket and used a sock. The Pijistrols really dislike smell of sweat and pass out every time, for a long, long time. The last woman, in 1888, had a great idea to strangled him with an old cloth !"
I blushed but laughed when I saw the sock. I laughed again because he spoke too fast and, even now, I’m not sure of what I heard.
"Which woman in 1888 ? What do you mean ?"
"It was the same man that humans named « Jack the Ripper », after killing Mary Jane Kelly, he tried again, but Elizabeth Perry succeeded to defend herself. He slept since that failure. Now, I’ll bring him back to Dujero where he will be judged in his own world. That why he seems so distinguished, women get trapped, charmed by him."
I stopped smiling and began to really listen to him, listen as a child front his father, a pupil and his teacher. Maybe it was fear’s fault, but at this moment, I believed the Doctor.
"That man was the man who killed some whores in 1888 ? It is really the same man ?"
"Nearly five women, yes."
Under the surprise, I gasped. I didn’t feel my own indolent body, had a fancy that everything was a quixotic dream. I took a deep interest in the Doctor and this ludicrous and lovely blue box in my bathroom again, I guessed.
"You’re not an human ?"
"Not at all."
He seemed too proud when he claimed his alien nature. Then I pointed bathroom’s door, curiosity still dissatisfied.
"And this police box is a sort of… Ship ? A spaceship ?"
"Her name is the Tardis, which mean time and relative dimensions in space."
I chuckled, suspected him to had to say that a million times, also because he believed that his spacecraft was a girl.
"I didn’t know that spaceships was so small !"
"It's bigger on the inside."
Suddenly, the Doctor reacted as very outraged but I kept giggled loudly. Still euphoric, I went back where the Tardis waiting. She was dressed with midnight blue, deep colour which reminded me the sky at night. My hand caressed the painted wood yet common. In fact, from outside, it was an old police box without any interest. But inside, I saw through the half-open door a real control panel surrounded by cobalt and amber lights were like stars. The Doctor told me that the Tardis could travelled in space and in time : he can go around the most faraway planets, the most old moments of the Earth, in the darker corners of the universe or in the contrary, the brighter…
"Would you like to go on a little trip ?"
I beamed to him : it would be wonderful. I’m just a call-girl who lie to everyone around. For him, it doesn’t matter how I gain my life. I’m just a woman who cherish every life’s rarities. He could show me wild universe’s wealth and secrets. I’m just a person who can’t love a man. And he was more good-looking than before. Maybe I fancy him a bit.
But I couldn’t. I look at the Tardis for certainly the last time.
"I still can’t believe what I saw, tonight. I trust again that you must be a dream. A very, very weird and nice dream. But I can’t ; too many things hold me back here."
His smile persisted, but I noticed the acute and harrowing disappointment. At this moment, he looked like an old and so lonely man. Quickly, the Doctor regained his self-control and shrugged his shoulders : everything going to be alright, now.
Right before his departure, he asked my name.
"Hannah."
It was the last joy of the night. He began to set a foot in the blue box and saluted me.
"Goodbye, Belle."
"Goodbye, Doctor."
I was glad that he called me Belle even if he knew my real name. The wind blew ferociously around me, between four pity walls while the Tardis disappeared, like an illusion. Not Tardis any more, not Doctor any more, just the drab salmon wallpaper. I was so cold, I was so lonely, trying to understand the same Doctor’s painful emotions. Then, I positioned myself in front of a window in my room and waited.
But in the huge dark sky, I saw no flying blue box.