(no subject)
Pros to taking next semester off:
-A change
-New job experience
-time to work on myself
-time off from school
-time to travel and save up some money
Cons to taking next semester off:
-A change, I'm not sure I could handle
-Having to find a new job
-time to procrastinate more on working on myself
-graduate a semester later than my friends
-might just be running away from things
I can't get out of this loop. Everything just ends up canceling the other out. Ultimately, whatever, I won't take next semester off, but I'm realizing now as I worry over the end of the semester that I've made no headway. I'm still procrastinating as I've always done, and I really feel like working on that will help with a lot of other things. But I just can't find the motivation to do it. Start papers. Do more reading so that I can start papers. FUCKING START PAPERS ALREADY. And do some more work so I can get some more money. I just feel like what I have right now is hard enough. But it's not. Or it shouldn't be. I'm not working as hard as I could be, but I don't know how to make myself.
I want to do CBT and I want to stick with it no matter how much I hate it, but I can't afford the copays. I just can't manage money right now, I don't want to do that on top of everything else that I'm making myself struggle with. My mom offered to pay for some sessions, but I already owe her money and I just can't bring myself to accept money she hardly has.
-A change
-New job experience
-time to work on myself
-time off from school
-time to travel and save up some money
Cons to taking next semester off:
-A change, I'm not sure I could handle
-Having to find a new job
-time to procrastinate more on working on myself
-graduate a semester later than my friends
-might just be running away from things
I can't get out of this loop. Everything just ends up canceling the other out. Ultimately, whatever, I won't take next semester off, but I'm realizing now as I worry over the end of the semester that I've made no headway. I'm still procrastinating as I've always done, and I really feel like working on that will help with a lot of other things. But I just can't find the motivation to do it. Start papers. Do more reading so that I can start papers. FUCKING START PAPERS ALREADY. And do some more work so I can get some more money. I just feel like what I have right now is hard enough. But it's not. Or it shouldn't be. I'm not working as hard as I could be, but I don't know how to make myself.
I want to do CBT and I want to stick with it no matter how much I hate it, but I can't afford the copays. I just can't manage money right now, I don't want to do that on top of everything else that I'm making myself struggle with. My mom offered to pay for some sessions, but I already owe her money and I just can't bring myself to accept money she hardly has.