.poor.little.heart.
Today there was a revelation, and not mine.
It's oddly fascinating how someone can take words and apply it to his situation, words you adore, and words you had chosen, and used for only reasons you know, that he will never understand.
I had found a beautiful line from the journal of a_rodge by Pablo Neruda. I altered them, only slightly, to personalize the emotion those words inspired.
He took them to heart. I won't be correcting him, because, his expectations will not be met, even if I took the time to tell him, those words were far from his.
I no longer love him, that's certain,
but maybe I love him.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.
Maybe in each person's small, intense, and glorious world, he or she will live a life of constant self-reflection and introspection. Perhaps, every situation that person encounters, will adhere to his or her life, so that that person changes, or grows, or relapses accordingly. But what when. by mere chance, that someone misreads some event, spectacle, or even, words of his or her heart's affection? What if the following events are carried out, by chance, but perhaps, that chance has allowed for other occurances, or words, to be withheld... I am speaking in riddles, but it feels right.
He broke his heart only by his own accord... but it says something about our relationship just the same. If he was so set on reading a few heart wrenching lines, and imagining those same lines were in some way a response, a defense, or mere inspiration of his own part in my life... so be it. I'm not sure the outcome would have been different, had he ignored those words.. and allowed me to keep them for my own personal tragedy.
I'm sorry, my Heart, for every agonizing minute I put you through. It had been a sweet, adoring, though often difficult 4 months together... but if this is the only closure you can ingest, then I will not instill you to hold your breath, your affection, or your happiness any longer. Thank you for everything.. I'll miss our friendship prior to this often hard, though deeply caring relationship that bred such an end.
I hope that we'll be able to start over, a second time..some day.
I feel, at a loss, to say anything else.. maybe you'll read this...
...maybe you'll finally understand me...
..maybe I've accomplished nothing, but some peace of mind.
But something good can do much harm
and good may kill for your embrace
to keep you far from those dreams
you know you cannot dream
I'm stuck for now it seems
For now it's too late
And you may not wait
things that I have yet to know
vanish before they're complete
I may turn around,
to see if you're still there
but as for now, it's just not safe
maybe you'll wait for me
maybe you're gone.
It's oddly fascinating how someone can take words and apply it to his situation, words you adore, and words you had chosen, and used for only reasons you know, that he will never understand.
I had found a beautiful line from the journal of a_rodge by Pablo Neruda. I altered them, only slightly, to personalize the emotion those words inspired.
He took them to heart. I won't be correcting him, because, his expectations will not be met, even if I took the time to tell him, those words were far from his.
I no longer love him, that's certain,
but maybe I love him.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.
Maybe in each person's small, intense, and glorious world, he or she will live a life of constant self-reflection and introspection. Perhaps, every situation that person encounters, will adhere to his or her life, so that that person changes, or grows, or relapses accordingly. But what when. by mere chance, that someone misreads some event, spectacle, or even, words of his or her heart's affection? What if the following events are carried out, by chance, but perhaps, that chance has allowed for other occurances, or words, to be withheld... I am speaking in riddles, but it feels right.
He broke his heart only by his own accord... but it says something about our relationship just the same. If he was so set on reading a few heart wrenching lines, and imagining those same lines were in some way a response, a defense, or mere inspiration of his own part in my life... so be it. I'm not sure the outcome would have been different, had he ignored those words.. and allowed me to keep them for my own personal tragedy.
I'm sorry, my Heart, for every agonizing minute I put you through. It had been a sweet, adoring, though often difficult 4 months together... but if this is the only closure you can ingest, then I will not instill you to hold your breath, your affection, or your happiness any longer. Thank you for everything.. I'll miss our friendship prior to this often hard, though deeply caring relationship that bred such an end.
I hope that we'll be able to start over, a second time..some day.
I feel, at a loss, to say anything else.. maybe you'll read this...
...maybe you'll finally understand me...
..maybe I've accomplished nothing, but some peace of mind.
But something good can do much harm
and good may kill for your embrace
to keep you far from those dreams
you know you cannot dream
I'm stuck for now it seems
For now it's too late
And you may not wait
things that I have yet to know
vanish before they're complete
I may turn around,
to see if you're still there
but as for now, it's just not safe
maybe you'll wait for me
maybe you're gone.