Levity
Just so you people don't think I'm about to kill myself or something, I am going to prove that I can still laugh by sharing something I forgot to include earlier.
I dreamed about skunks last night.
Skunks.
I love skunks, and they were very playful, so it was pretty groovy, until they started getting bigger. And the bigger ones started producing really vile odors. And getting not-so-playful. These were not tame, friendly skunks. One was at least four feet tall. Akita-sized. At that point, the smell was pretty aggressively frightful.
I awoke, and wondered aloud to myself: "Self, why are you dreaming about oversized, smelly mustelids?"
Until I took a breath.
And was assailed by The Stench.
It smelled like something died in a bowl full of rotten broccoli. This stank would pierce Kevlar.
The dog was sleeping right outside the door, channeling an apparently endless supply of dog farts under the doorframe, from whence they were helpfully wafted across my helpless sleeping form by the bedside fan.
That is why I was dreaming of skunks (doesn't explain the tap-dancing or the spats, though).
Okay. I thought it was funny.
. . .
And people ask why I like snakes.
Snakes do not fart!
link
I dreamed about skunks last night.
Skunks.
I love skunks, and they were very playful, so it was pretty groovy, until they started getting bigger. And the bigger ones started producing really vile odors. And getting not-so-playful. These were not tame, friendly skunks. One was at least four feet tall. Akita-sized. At that point, the smell was pretty aggressively frightful.
I awoke, and wondered aloud to myself: "Self, why are you dreaming about oversized, smelly mustelids?"
Until I took a breath.
And was assailed by The Stench.
It smelled like something died in a bowl full of rotten broccoli. This stank would pierce Kevlar.
The dog was sleeping right outside the door, channeling an apparently endless supply of dog farts under the doorframe, from whence they were helpfully wafted across my helpless sleeping form by the bedside fan.
That is why I was dreaming of skunks (doesn't explain the tap-dancing or the spats, though).
Okay. I thought it was funny.
. . .
And people ask why I like snakes.
Snakes do not fart!
link