this is the REAL me-->
I have a form of bipolar that needs to be studied to be further diagnosed.
BIPOLAR/MANIC-DEPRESSIVE-->"a mood disorder, which means that the symptoms are disturbances or abnormalities of mood. Major depression is a more common illness, the symptoms of which are mainly those of 'low' mood. Bipolar disorder involves episodes of both serious mania and depression." (http://www.psychiatry24x7.com/index.jhtml?product=bipolar&source=google)
I am histrionic, explaining how I treated Rob. Here is a confession I've held inside and finally burst out to my sister last night:
The relationship began to go downhill the moment he popped the ring on December 26th. That was when I saw the ring as a way to control and manipulate him into staying with me forever. I had already clutched myself to him like a leech, and in my histrionic state of mind, I was too vain and selfish and only thought of how I could make him stay.
HISTRIONIC--> "Individuals with Histrionic Personality Disorder may have difficulty achieving emotional intimacy in romantic or sexual relationships. Without being aware of it, they often act out a role (e.g., “victim” or “princess”) in their relationships to others. They may seek to control their partner through emotional manipulation or seductiveness on one level, whereas displaying a marked dependency on them at another level. Individuals with this disorder often have impaired relationships with same-sex friends’ relationships. These individuals may also alienate friends with demands for constant attention. They often become depressed and upset when they are not the center of attention. They may crave novelty, stimulation, and excitement and have a tendency to become bored with their usual routine. These individuals are often intolerant of, or frustrated by, situations that involve delayed gratification, and their actions are often directed at obtaining immediate satisfaction. Although they often initiate a job or project with great enthusiasm, their interest may lag quickly." (http://www.geocities.com/the_linkies/histrionic.html)
Shit..histrion ic, that would explain a hell of a lot wouldnt it? Especially how I am at school and with friends and why I'm accused of being the victim. that freaked me out just now..
I'm obsessive-compulsive to a certain degree
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE--> "Worries, doubts, superstitious beliefs all are common in everyday life. However, when they become so excessive such as hours of hand washing or make no sense at all such as driving around and around the block to check that an accident didn't occur then a diagnosis of OCD is made. In OCD, it is as though the brain gets stuck on a particular thought or urge and just can't let go. People with OCD often say the symptoms feel like a case of mental hiccups that won't go away. OCD is a medical brain disorder that causes problems in information processing. It is not your fault or the result of a "weak" or unstable personality." (http://www.ocfoundation.org/ocf1010a.htm)
That is me to a certain degree. And the rest you all know. The high depression. I just hope that clears things up of the what is wrong with Sophie deal and why I do the things I do. Reading the histrionic thing really did freak me out.
Because I remember Rob always saying I was trying to be the VICTIM. Shit..
Well folks..that is how I ruined everything.
BIPOLAR/MANIC-DEPRESSIVE-->"a mood disorder, which means that the symptoms are disturbances or abnormalities of mood. Major depression is a more common illness, the symptoms of which are mainly those of 'low' mood. Bipolar disorder involves episodes of both serious mania and depression." (http://www.psychiatry24x7.com/index.jhtml?product=bipolar&source=google)
I am histrionic, explaining how I treated Rob. Here is a confession I've held inside and finally burst out to my sister last night:
The relationship began to go downhill the moment he popped the ring on December 26th. That was when I saw the ring as a way to control and manipulate him into staying with me forever. I had already clutched myself to him like a leech, and in my histrionic state of mind, I was too vain and selfish and only thought of how I could make him stay.
HISTRIONIC--> "Individuals with Histrionic Personality Disorder may have difficulty achieving emotional intimacy in romantic or sexual relationships. Without being aware of it, they often act out a role (e.g., “victim” or “princess”) in their relationships to others. They may seek to control their partner through emotional manipulation or seductiveness on one level, whereas displaying a marked dependency on them at another level. Individuals with this disorder often have impaired relationships with same-sex friends’ relationships. These individuals may also alienate friends with demands for constant attention. They often become depressed and upset when they are not the center of attention. They may crave novelty, stimulation, and excitement and have a tendency to become bored with their usual routine. These individuals are often intolerant of, or frustrated by, situations that involve delayed gratification, and their actions are often directed at obtaining immediate satisfaction. Although they often initiate a job or project with great enthusiasm, their interest may lag quickly." (http://www.geocities.com/the_linkies/histrionic.html)
Shit..histrion ic, that would explain a hell of a lot wouldnt it? Especially how I am at school and with friends and why I'm accused of being the victim. that freaked me out just now..
I'm obsessive-compulsive to a certain degree
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE--> "Worries, doubts, superstitious beliefs all are common in everyday life. However, when they become so excessive such as hours of hand washing or make no sense at all such as driving around and around the block to check that an accident didn't occur then a diagnosis of OCD is made. In OCD, it is as though the brain gets stuck on a particular thought or urge and just can't let go. People with OCD often say the symptoms feel like a case of mental hiccups that won't go away. OCD is a medical brain disorder that causes problems in information processing. It is not your fault or the result of a "weak" or unstable personality." (http://www.ocfoundation.org/ocf1010a.htm)
That is me to a certain degree. And the rest you all know. The high depression. I just hope that clears things up of the what is wrong with Sophie deal and why I do the things I do. Reading the histrionic thing really did freak me out.
Because I remember Rob always saying I was trying to be the VICTIM. Shit..
Well folks..that is how I ruined everything.