Kiss, Kiss Fall In Love (2/2)
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The concept of “library love” is something that Woohyun never fully understood. Sure, there are good make out spots in the certain sections (he recommends the Restricted Section because it’s dangerous and forbidden and people are supposedly into that), you can play footsie under the study desks, and you’re forced to whisper into each other’s ears. But what’s so romantic about century old books that smell like mildew and having Old Hag Pince constantly shushing you when you weren’t even talking that loud in the first place? Woohyun will never know.
But since Myungsoo and Sungyeol are apparently fans of the silent death trap, that’s why he’s currently crouched behind the Invisibility section during his free period. He peers through the gaps in the shelves as he watches the couple study together.
“Why are they always studying together when they could be making out?” Woohyun mutters to himself, shaking his head. “Looks like I’m going to have to change that.”
The Slytherin pulls out his wand from his pocket and with a single wave, a small, pink bubble heart is conjured in the air. It disconnects from the end of his wand with a pop and hovers in front of him. With another tap, the words “Kiss Me” appear in cursive letters on the front. Satisfied with his work, Woohyun waves his wand again and sends the heart on its merry way towards the couple.
It floats through the bookshelf (not colliding with an invisible book, luckily) and stops right behind Myungsoo, in a perfect line with Sungyeol’s vision. Woohyun mentally high fives himself with a pleased smile.
A few seconds after the heart is put in place, Sungyeol glances up from his textbook. He blinks at the bubble heart before snorting once with a shake of his head and turning back to his homework.
Woohyun’s once satisfied smile dips into a frown. He sets his jaw and sends over three more hearts with “Kiss Me”, “Please?”, and “Just once?” and makes them bounce a little in the air to get Sungyeol’s attention again.
Luckily, it works and Sungyeol lifts his head from his reading again. His eyes widen a little and he clears his throat awkwardly. “Stop that,” he mumbles, staring back down at his textbook intently.
“Stop what?” Myungsoo asks as he dips his quill in his inkwell, completely oblivious to what is going on behind him.
Woohyun continues to send over more and more hearts with determination, making a growing wall of fuschia behind Myungsoo. He’s probably overdoing it, but hey, when Nam Woohyun commits to something, he commits.
Sungyeol frantically looks around as the hearts start to curve into a dome over Myungsoo’s head. “Seriously, Myungsoo, stop. People are starting to stare.”
It’s at that moment that the Hufflepuff finally looks away from his parchment to give his boyfriend a confused look. “What are you talking about?”
Sungyeol glances behind him at the wall of hearts and then throws another quick peek at the students who are sitting around them. He lets out a frustrated sigh. “If I just do it, will you stop it?”
“But I’m not doing anything!” Myungsoo insists.
“Oh just come here!”
Woohyun holds his breath, tightening his grip on his wand, when Sungyeol grabs Myungsoo wrist and pulls the younger boy towards him and all he can think is do it do it do it do it do it do it.
But because Woohyun has chronic tunnel vision and is horribly unaware of his surroundings when he’s concentrating, he fails to notice the presence of a fun sized Hufflepuff hunched over next to him.
“What are we looking at?” Dongwoo whispers suddenly in his ear.
Woohyun jolts in shock, falling over onto the ground and flailing his arm out that’s holding his wand steady. The sounds of a giant explosion and a few screams has Woohyun and Dongwoo both clambering to their feet and peering through the bookshelf.
A thick layer of rose petals buries everything within a six foot radius of Myungsoo and Sungyeol, the two sitting still as statues as petals cover their table and stick in their hair, completely dazed.
“What is going on here?” Madam Pince appears from behind a bookshelf and gapes at the situation before her.
Myungsoo and Sungyeol quickly stutter to explain the situation but fail to do so coherently due to their confusion. They duck their heads as the librarian orders them to two hours of detention and begins to launch into a lengthy lecture about the purpose of libraries and correct conduct that students should be displaying while using them.
“Are those rose petals? Are they making a potion?” Dongwoo asks innocently and Woohyun simply takes the boy by his shoulders and quickly steers him away from the scene.
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‘Confidence is key.’ That is the motto that Lee Howon lives his life by. Whether it’s the way he commands his broom and the Quaffle on the Quidditch pitch or how he carries himself as he walks through the halls, Howon ensures that there is an air of confidence in everything he does. He’s found that if he believes that what is he doing is right (even if he’s not quite sure of himself deep down), then others will too. Therefore, in addition to sports and school, Howon is confident in his plan to get Myungsoo to kiss Sungyeol and he is just as confident that he’s going to win this bet.
Howon confidently walks into Professor Flitwick’s classroom during the passing time between third and fourth period. He confidently places a small envelope containing a handwritten letter on the chair he is confident belongs to Myungsoo, the message: “Today is National Kiss Day in the Muggle World apparently. Shouldn’t we participate? ;) - Sungyeol.” And he strolls confidently --
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“Seriously?” Sungjong deadpans. “You just used the word ‘confident’ like ten times.”
“Don’t interrupt me,” Howon snaps back and, after a simply narrowing of the youngers’ eyes, quickly adds a meek “Please?”. The older Gryffindor clears his throat and glances around the pub and anywhere other than the pair of malicious eyes boring holes into his skull. “Um, now where was I … Oh, right.”
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And he strolls confidently out of the classroom, head held high. Confident.
-- -- -- --
Howon takes his time leaving fourth period. He knows Flitwick always loses track of time during his lessons and ends up letting his classes out ten minutes late. After climbing the stairs to the third floor Charms Corridor, he spots Sungyeol leaning against the wall opposite of the Charms classroom and quickly hides behind a pillar.
Howon pokes his head around the stone column and watches the Ravenclaw scuff his foot boredly against the ground. Flitwick's rushed voice can be heard followed by a chorus of rustling and murmurs and wooden chair scraping against the cement floor.
Perfect timing, he smirks confidently.
Students pour out of the classroom, eager to get to the Great Hall for lunch. Howon glosses over them, his eyes searching for his fourth year friend. But his attention is pulled away from the classroom’s doorway when a small Hufflepuff girl marches straight up to Sungyeol and a loud smack echoes through the hallway.
Howon’s expression is equally as shocked as Sungyeol’s as the Ravenclaw stares down at the girl with wide eyes, a hand against his reddening cheek.
“How dare you, Lee Sungyeol, how dare you?” she hisses and if looks could kill, Sungyeol would already be six feet under.
“Wha…?” Sungyeol looks around in confusion.
The girl plows on. “You know, I thought you were a great guy and I was so happy that Myungsoo found someone like you because you two look so good together and I can tell Myungsoo really likes you. I mean, I’ve heard you’re a little awkward and socially inept sometimes but this is just sickening.”
“What are you talking about?! I don’t even know you!” Sungyeol all but shrieks.
“That makes it even worse!” the girl screams.
Howon’s eyes widen with even more shock when her hand collides with Sungyeol’s other cheek at the same moment Myungsoo walks out from the classroom.
“Whoa, what’s going on?” Myungsoo rushes over and places himself between Sungyeol and the girl. He stares at his housemate with alarm.
The girl places a hand on Myungsoo’s shoulders and looks him straight in the eye. “I’m saying this as your housemate and friend. You honestly deserve better.”
She throws one more deathly glare at Sungyeol before turning away from the couple and walking down the hall.
“Who was that?” Sungyeol asks, voice filled with horror.
“Jinyoung? She sits next to me in class. She’s usually really quiet and nice.” Myungsoo’s lips twist a little, perplexed. “What did you do to her?”
“Nothing!” the Ravenclaw cries.
Myungsoo simply shrugs and asks him if he’s okay, gently patting his boyfriend’s swelling cheeks with an amused grin.
As Jinyoung passes the pillar Howon’s hiding behind, he catches a glimpse of a torn envelope crumpled in her hand. He smacks his forehead and drags his palm down the remainder of his face (confidently).
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Woohyun thinks that some things are best done the traditional way. Take driving on the right side of the road, for example, or the way to eat a cupcake (you’re supposed to twist the bottom half off and sandwich the frosting. It’s much more gentlemanly that way and Woohyun considers himself to be nothing less than classy). And when it comes to kissing, what's more traditional than a kiss forced upon two people by a plant hanging over a doorway? Nothing.
So even though the weeks are pushing into May and he’s four months shy of the holiday season, Woohyun is currently balancing himself on top of a somewhat sketchy looking wooden chair, a sprig of mistletoe that Dongwoo found somewhere around campus in hand. He pushes himself onto his toes and carefully tacts it above the doorway to an empty classroom in the Charms corridor.
It’s only after he climbs down from the chair (almost falling off a couple of times) and admires his work with a satisfied smile that he wonders why he didn’t just conjure one with his wand. Or use a levitation spell. Or get Dongwoo to do it for him. He shrugs off the thought and straightens out his sweater and tie as his two targets -- uh, he means, friends appear in the doorway.
“Okay we’re here,” Sungyeol says boredly as he and Myungsoo enter the classroom. “Why do you need us again?”
“Because I told you that I needed help preparing for the Charms O.W.L practicum,” Woohyun fibs with ease. “And as my best friend, it’s your duty to help me and do everything in your power to ensure that I do well on my examinations.”
Sungyeol gives him a skeptical look. “Really?”
“Yes! Why do you sound so shocked? I care about my grades too, you know!”
“Coulda fooled me.”
“But why am I here?” Myungsoo speaks up.
“Oh, little Jigglypuff,” The Slytherin lets out a breathy chuckle, as if he finds the younger boy’s question both amusing and endearing. “Haven’t you heard of the phrase ‘three is better than two’?”
“It’s ‘two is better than one’,” Sungyeol deadpans.
“And four’s a crowd or company or whatever.” Woohyun waves a hand. “But I have to set up a few things before we start. So stand over near the door while I get ready.”
He turns around and glances around the empty classroom, pressing his lips in a firm line as he notes the lack of tangible objects in the room. There’s not much he can work with so he ends up just shifting the positions of a few chairs and stacking random books he finds on the professor’s desk. He snickers to himself when he glances over at Myungsoo and Sungyeol only to find them standing the doorway like he told them to, already fallen into a quiet conversation under his festive kissing trap.
“Oh, would you look at that!” Woohyun points at the plant hanging above the couple with faux astonishment. “A mistletoe! Well, you two know what that means!”
“Huh? It’s not even Christmas,” Myungsoo mumbles as he takes a few steps away from Sungyeol to glances up as well.
“Nope, nope!” The Slytherin shakes his head and shoves the Hufflepuff back towards Sungyeol. “You know rules of when two people are caught under a mistletoe. Go on! I won’t look.” He places a hand over his eyes for added dramatic effect.
It’s silent for a few moments and Woohyun tries to calm himself down and not get too excited even though he knows this is it.
He’s going to win this bet and he’s going to rub it into Lee Ho-loser’s face for the rest of the term. And probably the rest of their Hogwarts careers. And maybe even after that, too, when they’re both old and wrinkly and can barely walk. And he will finally be able to take all those falling jokes and shove it right back up that devil spawn’s --
“But … that’s not even a mistletoe,” Sungyeol says, cutting off Woohyun’s inner monologue.
Woohyun spreads his fingers a little to blink at his best friend. “What?”
“It’s a fig branch,” the Ravenclaw clarifies with a nod.
Woohyun’s hand drops like lead back to his side and his expression flattens. “What?”
“Yeah, there's even a few figs on it.” Sungyeol continues to study the plant. “Mistletoe doesn’t bare fruit. Fun fact: the mistletoe attaches itself to and penetrates the branches of a tree or shrub. It then absorbs water and nutrients from the host plant, making it a parasitic plant.” He smiles smugly.
“Ugh!” Woohyun ruffles the back of his hair in frustration. He never should have trusted that peewee badger lover. The kid is good at Care of Magical Creatures, not Botany, so he really shouldn’t blame the sixth year for his failed plan. (But he’s going to anyway.)
“Oh, wow, that’s actually kind of interesting,” Myungsoo muses. “Do you know anything about figs?”
Sungyeol’s eyes light up. “Actually --”
“Ughhhhhhh!” Woohyun yells again and stomps out of the room, pushing his way past the couple, silently pledging with Dongwoo's life that he will get those two to kiss.
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This isn't cheating. This isn't cheating because Howon doesn't cheat. He may play a bit dirty at times but he doesn't cheat.
Cheating would be physically tying down Sungyeol and pushing Myungsoo's face to the Ravenclaw's or blatantly telling Myungsoo about the bet and asking him to kiss Sungyeol. And Howon knows the fourth year would do it because he’d do anything to help a friend.
But leaving a box of chocolates spiked with a love potion on Myungsoo's bed is not cheating. It’s … alchemy-based convincing. Yeah. That’s it.
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“Those were from you?” Myungsoo asks, appalled.
“Why am I the one who’s always getting interrupted?!” Howon holds out his arms in frustration as Woohyun snickers at his side. “Yes, those were from me. But please let me finish my story before you judge me. Okay? Okay.”
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Howon double checks the bed to ensure that it belongs to Myungsoo (he is most definitely not making that mistake again) and places the card with Sungyeol’s signature next to the silver and gold wrapped box. He fluffs up the bow a bit and draws back with a satisfied smirk because damn, he is good. The Gryffindor thinks that even Sungjong would fall for this trap and that’s saying something.
He slinks out of Myungsoo’s room and quietly exits the Hufflepuff dormitory, faintly worrying about the chocolates ending up in someone else’s stomach but still, as always, confident.
-- -- -- --
It’s going to be a good day; Howon can feel it. One of his morning classes got cancelled, an essay deadline got extended, and the Great Hall is serving chicken tenders for lunch.
As he munches on his dinosaur shaped morsels of chickeny goodness (or “Mini-Me nuggets!” as Dongwoo has dubbed them), Howon happily chats with Sungjong about their upcoming Quidditch match and different formations they need to run later during practice. He doesn’t even let Woohyun’s attempt to stick grains of rice in his hair from further down the table dampen his mood.
He’s heard from one of his “sources” that Myungsoo had found the box of chocolates on his bed the previous night and had eaten a few before going to sleep. And if everything went according to plan, Myungsoo and Sungyeol would be walking into the Great Hall any minute now, Myungsoo smothering the Ravenclaw with an infinite amount of kisses, and he will claim his rightful victory over Nam Woohyun once again.
So yup, it’s a good day.
But Howon’s good day turns into a not so good day very rapidly when he spots an angry looking Myungsoo stomping into the Great Hall with a frantic Sungyeol right on his heels. The two come to a stop when Sungyeol manages to catch the back of Myungsoo’s sweater and turn the Hufflepuff around to face him.
“Hey, Myung, I asked you a question!”
“And I asked you to leave me alone!”
Upon hearing the bite and frustration in the younger’s voice, the five boys seated at the table gawk at Myungsoo, taken aback.
“Myungsoo --”
Sungyeol reaches out for Myungsoo's arm only to get his hand thrown back to his side.
“Stop following me!” Myungsoo continues to briskly walk further into the hall, ignoring the Ravenclaw chasing after him.
“But --” The fifth year grabs onto Myungsoo's shoulder.
Myungsoo whirls around and harshly shoves Sungyeol away with a single push to the elder's chest. Their friends watch in shock as the expression on Sungyeol’s face morphs from one of disbelief to plain hurt.
Howon eyes the fourth year, confused and stunned. Myungsoo, a fan of person to person contact and human touch, was always one to want to draw people closer him, not push them away. He would never physically hurt or push anyone, no matter how angry or upset he was. Something is wrong. And Howon’s sure he’s not the only one thinking the same as nearby students begin to direct their gazes at the couple standing the middle of the Great Hall.
“Don’t you get it, Sungyeol?" Myungsoo is almost pleading at this point. "I don’t like you! I think I might even hate you!”
If anguish was to have a physical form, it would be the look on Sungyeol’s face. “W-What?” he croaks.
“You’re awkward and paranoid and your legs are disproportionate to your body! And you never once initiated anything when we were together! You took two weeks to hold my hand and you only did it because you were scared and we were walking back to the castle in the dark!” The Hufflepuff takes a deep breath and stares pointedly out of the giant windows, eyebrows furrowed and mouth set in a straight line.
“Really? You r-really feel that way?” Sungyeol stutters out, his voice strained.
“Yes I do.” Myungsoo looks directly into Sungyeol’s eyes, expression icy. “Read my lips, Sungyeol. I. Don’t. Like. You. Leave. Me. Alone.”
The fourth year brushes past the Ravenclaw and walks out of the Great Hall without another word. Murmurs and whispers begin to circle around them as Sungyeol stands rooted in his spot, unfocused eyes staring straight forward but not truly seeing anything.
Dongwoo jumps to his feet when Sungyeol’s body sways a bit disorientedly. Steadying the taller boy, he whispers soft words of “He’s probably just having a bad day. He doesn't mean it, Yeol,” into Sungyeol’s ear and guides him to sit down.
Sungyeol doesn’t respond, keeping his head bowed and blinking rapidly as if to conceal his rather obvious tears from flowing down his cheeks.
Woohyun looks at his broken best friend with worry before standing up from his seat and moving to sit across from Howon. “Did you do that?” he asks in a voice that most accusing than anything.
“No, I didn’t do anything!” The Gryffindor shakes his head earnestly. “Why would I do that? We’re supposed to get them to kiss, not break up.”
“Well, you must have done something!”
Howon sighs and stares down at his plate of half finished chicken tenders. “I gave Myungsoo some chocolates, okay? But they had a love potion, not … whatever caused that.”
“You gave him a love potion?!” Woohyun’s eyes go so wide, Howon swears (wishes) they’re going to fall out of his head. “That’s cheating!”
“No, it’s not! I don’t cheat! And it doesn’t matter anyway since it obviously didn’t work. I followed the directions exactly. Powered moonstone, Ashwinder eggs, peppermint, rose petals --”
“Thorns,” Sungjong interjects suddenly.
“Huh?” Howon turns to the younger Gryffindor sitting next to Woohyun.
“You meant to say thorns, right?” Sungjong glances between the two fifth year Chasers. “Love potions are made with rose thorns. Hate potions are made with rose petals, you homewrecker.”
Woohyun stares at Howon as Howon stares at Sungjong, the rivals both donning identical idiotic expressions of confusion. Realization hits Howon first and he jumps to his feet, muttering “Shit shit shit shit shit” under his breath as he sprints out of the Great Hall.
Woohyun blinks as he watches Howon’s retreating figure disappear. “So he actually meant to say thorns?” he asks, still alarmingly confused.
Sungjong just stares at the Slytherin with such disbelief he actually feels a bit angry. He shakes his head slowly and turns back to his lunch.
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Woohyun brings it up again as they walk up the staircase to the seventh floor corridor.
“And did you see Myungsoo’s face when he saw Sungyeol?” The Slytherin asks dramatically, as if Howon wasn’t there when they dragged the miffed Hufflepuff to Slughorn’s office, as if he wasn’t paying attention when Myungsoo took the counter potion, as if he didn’t feel guilty enough already.
Woohyun shakes his head in mocking disappointment. “He looked this close to tears. You’re so lucky Sungyeol is a forgiving person. How could you do that to your best friend?”
Howon grits his teeth. “Shut up. I didn’t mean to give him a hate potion.”
They turn down the left corridor at the seventh floor landing.
“Why are we teaming up again?” Howon asks begrudgingly. “I thought we’re supposed to be competing against each other.”
Woohyun rolls his eyes. “How many times do I have to explain this to you? We’re teaming up because our individual efforts obviously weren’t good enough. I accidently got them detention and you almost ruined their relationship, you homewrecker.”
“Stop calling me that,” The Gryffindor mutters, fists clenched at his sides.
Woohyun ignores him and continues to look straight ahead. “Besides haven’t you heard of that saying … what is it now? Two is … two is …” He trails off.
“Two is better than one?” Howon supplies.
“No, no that’s not it.” Woohyun shakes his head. “It’s something like … two peas in a pod make for better soup -- I don’t know, something like that. But basically, we’ll both contribute and then whoever's friend is truly the best will do the rest.”
Howon side eyes him before shaking his head with a resigned sigh. “Okay. And why are we doing all of this again?”
“For our friends’ happiness, of course,” Woohyun answers simply even though they both know Sungyeol and Myungsoo’s happiness is one of the last things on their minds.
“Right. Their happiness.”
They come to a stop at the end of the corridor.
“What the hell is this?” Howon stares up at the tapestry hanging on the stone wall. It’s depicting a man in a ridiculous feathered hat and a bunch of trolls dressed in equally ridiculous tutus and ballet slippers. “Where is it? Are you playing a joke on me again? Because this one is not funny at all.”
Woohyun scoffs. “Don’t you know anything about the Room of Requirement? You have to walk past it three times for the door to appear. We need to pull out all the stops if this is going to work. So just think of the most romantic setting you can think of. Can you do that much or do you actually lack so much relationship experience that I’m going to have to do everything myself?”
Howon narrows his eyes before shoving Woohyun to the side. He briskly walks back and forth past the tapestry, training his thoughts on the most romantic (yet, tasteful) setting he can think of. As he passes the hanging cloth for the third time, a wooden door molds out of the opposite stone wall.
Woohyun brushes past the Gryffindor and turns the knob. They enter the room.
It’s dim inside, only being lit by dozens of wax candles. In the center of the room sits a giant bed with dozens of plush looking pillows, rose petals scattered over the comforter. A plate of tuxedo strawberries sits on a bedside table next to two champagne glasses and a bottle in a bucket of ice. A soft tune of a piano hums from an unseen source.
“Not bad, Lee, not bad.” Woohyun nods slowly as he glances around.
Howon crosses his arms over his chest and smiles smugly.
The Slytherin walks further into the room and snags a strawberry off the platter. “A bit cliche though, but I guess it will do.” He tosses the piece of fruit into his mouth with a shrug.
Howon’s arms drop back to his side and his smile turns into an annoyed frown. He stares up at the ceiling, huffing in exasperation, and turns to leave the room.
“Let’s just get them in here and end this stupid bet already. I’m sick of having to talk to you and see your stupid face all the time.”
Woohyun’s jaw drops in offense. “Hey --”
Howon slams the door in his face.
-- -- -- --
“Where are you taking us?” Sungyeol asks as Woohyun and Howon push the couple down the seventh floor’s left corridor.
“I’m so hungry,” Myungsoo stops in the middle of the hallway to clutch his growling stomach.
“Shut up, creampuff. Keep walking!” Woohyun orders.
Sungyeol throws the Slytherin a look over his shoulder. “Hey, don’t talk to him like that.”
“Yeah, don’t talk to him like that.” Howon adds defensively as he pulls a pouting Myungsoo by the arm.
Myungsoo lets out a whine full of longing. “Creampuffs.”
Woohyun shakes his head and mumbles up to Sungyeol, “Your boyfriend is such a child.”
“He gets like that when he’s hungry.” The Ravenclaw shrugs. “I think it’s cute.”
The Slytherin fakes a gagging noise as they walk up to the tapestry at the end of the corridor.
“You brought us to the Room of Requirement?” Sungyeol questions.
“How did you know?” Howon stares up at him, honestly impressed.
“Everyone knows the Room of Requirement is located across from the Troll Tapestry.” The Ravenclaw rolls his eyes and tucks his hands in his pockets. “Fun fact,” A haughty smirk appears on his face and Woohyun groans. “People regarded Barnabas as a complete loon for trying to teach trolls ballet and gave him the name ‘Barnabas the Barmy’, barmy being an informal adjective for mad, crazy, or extremely foolish according to the Oxford Dictionary of English. Interesting, right?” Sungyeol turns to Myungsoo with an expectant smile.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s fascinating.” The Hufflepuff grabs Sungyeol by the wrist and drags him back and forth in front of the tapestry. “Let’s just do the thing so we can go back to lunch. We’re missing udon day.”
As they past for the third time, Woohyun rushes to the door right when it appears on the opposite wall and throws it open. Howon pushes the couple inside with an “Enjoy! Don’t come out until you’re done!” and Woohyun slams the door in their faces.
The two Chasers throw their bodies against the door, holding it in place as the couple inside tries to escape.
“Hey! Let us out!” Sungyeol yells, pounding on the door.
“Why did you lock us in here?” Myungsoo whines.
“This isn’t funny!”
“I’m still hungry!”
Howon sighs as the two younger boys continue to complain and try to shove the door open.
“We’re not letting you out until you’re done,” the Gryffindor calls back through the the door. “So use the Room quickly if you want us to open the door and let you go back to lunch.”
Another round of grumbling and door pounding.
“Just do it already!” Woohyun screams at the door.
Then, everything goes oddly silent.
Woohyun and Howon give each other questioning glances before pressing their ears to the door. They narrow their eyes, lips pressed into firm lines, as they strain their ears for any sort of progress behind the thick oak panels. They hear a bit of shuffling, a few footsteps, Sungyeol saying something to Myungsoo and Myungsoo replying, their voices too soft to carry to Woohyun and Howon’s ears coherently.
When suddenly, a loud moan travels through the door.
The two fifth years spring back from the door in shock. They turn towards each other, jaws hanging, before looking back at the door leading into the Room. They both scramble back to their earlier positions and press their ears flat against the door when they hear Sungyeol begin to speak again.
“Myungsoo, stop.” Embarrassment is evident in the Ravenclaw’s voice. “They can probably hear you.”
“What? Why? They said to enjoy and I’m doing just that. Now, stop talking and come here.”
“Wait, hold on.”
It gets quiet again for a few seconds before there is a soft knocking on the door.
Woohyun glances at Howon before answering. “Uhhh, yes?”
“Do you guys wanna come in and join us?” Sungyeol asks.
Woohyun draws back from the door with a disgusted expression etched onto his face. “What? No!”
“Why? There’s plenty to go around. I don’t mind sharing.”
“I kind of mind,” Myungsoo calls, the slight echo of his voice indicating that he is further away from the door.
“Uhhhh, no thanks.” Howon says, a bit discomforted. “But we appreciate the offer, I guess.”
“Okay suit yourself,” Sungyeol singsongs. “More steak and lobster for us.”
Wait ... what?
Woohyun and Howon pull the door open and run into the Room of Requirement, pushing Sungyeol to the side in the process. In the center of the Room, there is nothing but a long buffet table with dozens of different dishes and desserts and a fourth year Hufflepuff standing at one end, stuffing his face with whatever he can get his hands on.
“What is all of this?” Howon asks, staring at the fully roasted pig with an apple in its mouth at the center of the buffet.
“Isn’t it great?!” Myungsoo beams, mouth full. “There’s even udon too!” He points to a giant pot at one end of the table, eyes shining like a first year’s seeing Hogwarts for the first time.
“But, but, but,” Woohyun sputters as he looks around the room. “But what happened to the bed and the rose petals and the chocolate strawberries and the baby making music?”
“It was all here when the two of us were in here earlier,” Howon adds with a troubled frown.
The clatter of a fork hitting the ground echos throughout the room as Sungyeol and Myungsoo stare at the two fifth years with wide eyes. They glance at each other before looking back at Howon and Woohyun again.
“Oh.”
The couple immediately begins to make their way to the door without another word. (Myungsoo quickly piles a few more pieces of meat on his plate before scurrying after Sungyeol.)
“Where are you going?” Woohyun asks and halts Sungyeol by grabbing his arm.
“Well, I mean, this is the Room of Requirement.” The taller boy gently removes Woohyun’s grip with an awkward laugh. He slowly walks backwards towards his boyfriend who is already waiting by the door. “And if all of that showed up when it was just the two of you here then … I think you need the room more than us.”
Myungsoo nods in agreement and Howon and Woohyun watch the couple run through the doorway before they can explain that no, they most definitely do not need the Room for that reason. When the door shuts close, the two stand in a stiff silence as they glance around the room, the Slytherin with a small pout and the Gryffindor with his cheeks puffed.
“Well,” Woohyun huffs through his nose and turns to the boy next to him. “I guess there’s only one thing to do.”
Howon looks at him, mortified. “W-What?”
“We eat the rest of the food and think of another plan, of course.” Woohyun points over his shoulder at the buffet table before narrowing his eyes with a smirk. “What were you thinking about?”
Howon scoffs a “Nothing,” and shoves a cackling Woohyun to the side. He walks up to the table and grabs a chicken wing, taking a harsh bite out of it and wondering what he did in a past life to deserve this.
skip ►|
“Are you sure this is going to work?” Howon asks, eyeing the couple walking a few steps in front of them. “Because it seems kinda -- no, really stupid to me.”
“Of course it’s going to work.” Woohyun replies with ease. “Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop is the number one couple spot in Hogsmeade. Almost everyone who goes in there ends up kissing at some point. Ten minutes and they’ll be eating each other’s faces for sure. Now, like we practiced.”
They pick up their pace a bit so they are practically breathing down Myungsoo and Sungyeol’s necks, a little too close for Howon’s comfort but Woohyun seems fine with the invasion of their friends’ personal space. The couple is chatting about something that neither Woohyun nor Howon care about so it’s the perfect time to begin Phase One of “Operation: Kiss Kiss Fall In Love” (Woohyun obviously came up with the name).
“Hey, Howon,” Woohyun starts in an overly loud, overly enunciated voice that causes the Gryffindor to almost physically face palm himself. “Have you heard about Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop?”
Sungyeol glances over his shoulder. He gives his best friend a strange look, to which Woohyun responds with a toothy smile.
When he turns back around and resumes his conversation with Myungsoo, Woohyun nudges Howon’s side. The latter sighs. “Why no, Woohyun, I haven’t. What is it?”
“Well, it’s just the hottest couple spot in Hogsmeade located off of High Street,” The Slytherin responds enthusiastically.
“Do they only serve tea?” Howon asks flatly. “It is a tea shop, after all.”
“No! They also serve sandwiches and pastries and ...” A sly smirk works its way onto Woohyun’s lips, “coffee.”
Sungyeol’s ears almost visibly perk. “Coffee?”
“Yup.” Woohyun answers, emphasizing the ‘p’ with a popping sound.
“Hear it’s some of the best in the area,” Howon adds. “A must try for coffee enthusiasts, apparently.”
Sungyeol turns to Myungsoo excitedly. “We should go check it out after Potage's and Tomes and Scrolls.”
The fourth year grins up at him and nods. “Okay.”
A haughty smile stretches across Woohyun’s face as Howon stares at the couple’s back with his jaw hanging. Was it seriously that easy?
“Phase One, done.” Woohyun holds out a fist to Howon. “Whose plan is stupid now, huh?”
The Gryffindor rolls his eyes and unwillingly bumps his fist against the Slytherin’s. He briskly walks down the snow covered path in an attempt to catch up with their friends (but mostly to get away from the dumb tree standing in the middle of the walkway).
-- -- -- --
Howon grimaces slightly as he and Woohyun stare up at the small shop in front of them.
Couples flow in and out in a constant stream, all giggly, all smiley, all looking very much in love. Howon wonders how a small hole in the wall can turn normal teenagers into lovestruck, starry-eyed morons. He sees almost half of these couples around the castle on a daily basis and never once has he seen them like … well, this. Love is weird.
“So this is it?” Howon asks, the pink door, windows, and sign written in a curly cursive font already giving him his answer.
“Definitely,” Woohyun responds with a single nod.
“Do we really have to go inside?” Through the front window, Howon notes the way a few couples are shamelessly sucking face with a frown.
“It would be much less creepy to spy on them from inside. Other couples might think we’re pervs, peeping through the window all shady like and stuff.”
They go back to staring at the building in silence. After a few moments, Howon lets out a resolute huff and marches up to the door.
The little cafe is much smaller than expected, a bit cramped even. There is barely enough room to walk in between the overly decorated tables and the maximum occupancy level has obviously been exceeded (along with the maximum amount of items that are allowed to be pink in a given space, but that’s just Howon’s opinion).
“I’ll be right with you!” A stout woman with a tight bun atop her head, yielding a ceramic tea pot, calls from further in the shop.
Howon and Woohyun watch as she maneuvers her way around tables, ducking just at the right moments to avoid headbutting cherubs that are flying over the tables and handing off her teapot to a house elf.
“How may I help you two today?” Madam Puddifoot asks, dusting her hand off on her ruffled apron.
“Table for two please,” Howon replies.
She grabs two menus (pink, of course) from under the wooden podium (again, painted pink). “Right this way,” she smiles cheerfully.
She leads them into the cluster of tables and couples. After nearly tripping multiple times on chair legs and the legs of actual people, they find themselves standing next to a table in the center of the room.
“Is this alright for you?” Puddifoot motions to the table.
“If we sit here, Myungsoo and Sungyeol will see us for sure.” Howon mutters lowly to Woohyun.
“Uh, are there any other tables that are a little more out of the way?” The Slytherin’s tone is so surprisingly polite that Howon is almost impressed. “Maybe against a wall? Or perhaps behind a large potted plant?”
And the usual imbecile Woohyun returns. Howon nearly facepalms.
“Oh, I understand.” Puddifoot nods slowly and gives them a wink, before leading them to another table. “Why didn’t you say so before? There’s no need to be shy!”
“What?” But realization quickly dawns on Woohyun’s face in the form of a horrified and disgusted expression. “Wait, no! That’s not --”
“Just let it go.” Howon claps his hand down on Woohyun’s shoulders and pushes him forward to follow the shop owner.
The two boys are seated against the wall towards the back corner of the shop. Puddifoot hands them each a menu and gives them another wink and a giddy smile before flittering off to serve other customers.
“This is a pretty good spot,” Howon comments as he looks towards the entrance for any sign of their friends. “We can basically see all the tables so it shouldn’t matter where they sit and I don’t think they’ll see us right away when they come in.”
“What are you going to get?” Woohyun, barely hearing a word that came out of the Gryffindor’s mouth, already has his menu open and his eyes are skimming down the list of options.
Howon turns back towards him with a raised eyebrow. “You’re actually going to order something?”
“Well, yeah.” The Slytherin shrugs. “I mean, we’re already here so we might as well right? I think I’m going to go with the tea and lemon squares.”
“Tea and lemon squares?” Howon snorts, opening his own menu. “What are you? A sixty-eight year old grandmother?”
Woohyun huffs childishly. “At least I don’t play Quidditch like one.”
“Yeah, you’re more of a ninety year old one with almost gone eyesight,” Howon says, not glancing up from his menu.
Woohyun frowns and reaches for a small sugar bowl to throw at the smirking boy sitting across from him when Madam Puddifoot returns to their table.
“So what can I get for you two love bugs?”
“I’ll get a coffee and a plate of snickerdoodles.” Howon passes the women his menu with a sweet grin.
Woohyun rolls his eyes and mutters, “And he says I’m an elderly woman.”
The woman nods and turns to Woohyun. “And what about you, sweetheart?”
“Tea and lemon squares, please.” The Slytherin gives her an equally charming smile.
“Coming right up!”
“I think that was the first time I’ve ever heard you use the word ‘please’,” Howon says after Madam Puddifoot collects Woohyun’s menu and scurries off into the back area of the shop.
Woohyun scoffs, affronted. “Excuse you, I am a gentleman. A polite, refined -- What the bloody fuck?!”
Both boys flinch in their seats when a rain of pink descends onto their table and subsequently, their hair and clothes. They both look up to see a cherub hovering over their head with a woven basket hanging from its arm. It continues to toss endless handfuls of pieces of crepe paper and glitter on the two fifth years.
“Will you stop that?” Woohyun snaps.
The pink downpour pauses as the cherub slightly cringing away from him. It throws a final fistfull of confetti at Woohyun (Howon stifles his laugh into a snort) before turning its nose up in the air and flying over to another part of the shop.
“Ugh, stupid flying baby.” Woohyun grits his teeth and furiously dusts off his hair and clothes.
“You missed one.”
Woohyun stills when Howon reaches across the table to pluck a heart shaped piece of paper out of his hair. He blinks at the Gryffindor as Howon lets the confetti flutter to the ground and he swears he hears a high pitched, childlike giggle from another part of the room.
Howon notices Woohyun staring and gives him a strange look.
“What? Do I have glitter on my face or something?”
“What? Oh, no. Just -- thanks,” Woohyun finishes lamely and drops his eyes down to a small pile of glitter on the table.
A semi-awkward silence hangs in the air, which is really weird for Woohyun and Howon because usually, the two can never shut up.
Their orders arrive soon after and one comment from Howon about the amount of sugar Woohyun is putting in his tea puts an end to the silence. What starts off as bickering about proper sweetening techniques quickly transforms into an argument about whose dessert choice was best and then somehow leads into a fight of who is going to win the year’s Professional Quidditch League Championship (Howon says the Ballycastle Bats, Woohyun says Puddlemere United, but they both agree that the Appleby Arrows don’t stand a chance).
Throughout their conversation (it’s really more of a neverending debate), the two boys keep their eyes on the entrance, pausing momentarily and holding their breaths every time the chime about the door rings. When it’s not the couple they are hoping for, they pick up right where they left off without missing a beat, throwing their usual petty insults at each other as if nothing happened.
But after nearly two dozen snickerdoodles, a plate of lemon squares, and a few refills, Myungsoo and Sungyeol have yet to walk into the tea shop.
“It’s been almost an hour.” Howon sighs, glancing at his watch. “They’re not coming.”
“But they said they would,” Woohyun whines, flopping around in his seat with a pout.
“And you said this plan would work, but look where we are now,” Howon motions around them, “stuffed in the corner of an overly crowded coffee shop surrounded by hormonal teenagers who are making me slightly uncomfortable.” He shoots a glare at the couple sitting on the table next to theirs who have been making out for at least twenty minutes. Don’t they need to breathe or something? Howon shakes his head and takes another sip of his coffee.
“You can’t really blame them. This place is kinda romantic.”
“This,” Howon removes a piece of pink confetti from his mouth that somehow managed to make its way into his drink, “is not romantic.” He flicks it to the floor, lips pursed in distaste.
“Ugh fine, let’s get out of here.” Woohyun stands with a sigh and pulls out a few galleons from his pocket. He tosses them on the table and is about to head towards the door when Howon stops him.
“Wait, let me just get a to-go bag for the rest of these snickerdoodles before we leave.” The Gryffindor cranes his neck and raises a hand to get Madam Puddifoot’s attention.
Woohyun sinks back into the chair with an exaggerated sigh.
When Howon’s cookies are wrapped all nice and cozy in a heart adorned paper bag, the two boys make their way towards the exit, Woohyun a bit sulky from the failed plan and Howon happily munching on his snickerdoodles behind him.
Woohyun moves to grab the door knob when Madam Puddifoot catches his arm.
“You two are just a darling pair.” She giggles. “So cute and comfortable around each other. I’ve never seen another couple openly argue like that before. You two must have such a strong relationship. Come back soon, okay?”
Woohyun gapes at the woman’s assumption. He throws a quick glance at Howon who’s too busy counting his remaining cookies to hear their conversation. Woohyun considers trying to correct her again, telling her that no, they are most definitely not a couple. But instead, he ends up thinking ‘Screw it’ and just nods with a tightlipped smile. He quickly hurls himself out of the shop before she can say anything more.
“Well, that was a bust.”
"These are the best. We should have gotten another dozen.”
fast forward »
“And that’s when you guys showed up.”
The table goes quiet. By this time, Dongwoo is already chugging down his fourth glass of butterbeer (and Sunggyu has already told him that he needs to stop at least three times). Howon and Woohyun aren’t quite sure if the expressions on Myungsoo and Sungyeol’s faces are ones of shock, disgust, or something in between.
“So basically,” Sungjong breaks the silence, “you went on a date.”
Another beat of silence before --
“NO!”
“Ewwww! That’s gross! How can you say that?”
“I would never go on a date with him. I have standards, you know?”
“Oh, like you’re even close to mine.”
“You’re right, I completely exceed them.”
“Oh, my god. Don’t even --”
Sunggyu sighs, annoyed. “They’re perfect for each other.”
Dongwoo simply giggles, a foam mustache on his upper lip.
“But you guys talked about Quidditch over tea and cookies.” Myungsoo interrupts their fight, suppressing a smile. “That kind of sounds like a date to me.”
“Technically, I had coffee,” Howon mumbles.
“Oh, what kind?” Sungyeol’s eyes light up at the mention of the hot drink. “Was it good?”
Howon opens his mouth to answer when Woohyun cuts him off. “You would know if you showed up to the tea shop like you said you would. Where did you guys go anyway?”
“Potage’s Cauldron Shop and Tomes and Scrolls like we said. We were going to head over the Puddifoot’s but I guess we lost track of time ...”
“Lost track of time?” Woohyun repeats Sungyeol’s words slowly. “Lost track of time?! I’m going to have glitter and heart confetti in my hair for weeks and you lost track of time?! Why do I even bother?” The Slytherin overdramatically throws himself onto his side, laying flat on the wooden bench.
Howon shakes his head with a sigh. “I still can’t believe after everything, you guys still haven’t had your first kiss.”
“Actually about that …” Myungsoo lets out a nervous laugh and glances at Sungyeol.
Woohyun springs back up and looks at the couple, unblinking. “What happened? Did you two kiss? Sungyeol, please tell me you kissed him.”
“Sorry, but no,” Sungyeol grins sheepishly.
“So Myungsoo kissed first!” Howon is practically beaming as he bounces in his seat. “Ha! In your face Nam! I knew I would win.”
“Uh, I didn't kiss first either. Sorry.” Myungsoo shrugs with a small laugh.
“Then who kissed who?” Sungjong asks as Howon and Woohyun stare at their friends, not understanding the situation at all.
“Technically, neither of us kissed first,” Sungyeol says slowly.
“What?” Woohyun snaps, very frustrated but still very confused.
The Ravenclaw sighs, his ears starting to turn slightly red. “When we were in Tomes and Scrolls, I guess someone left a book on the ground. And Myungsoo, being Myungsoo, tripped on it and I tried to catch him and … yeah.”
Myungsoo ducks his head slightly, lips twisted in embarrassment as the other boys let the information sink in.
“So I win,” Woohyun states suddenly.
Howon turns to him, eyebrows drawn together. “Huh? No, you don’t.”
“Yes I do. Sungyeol could have just let Myungsoo fall. But he moved to catch Myungsoo, therefore making him responsible for the kiss.”
“But Myungsoo was the one who tripped,” Howon counters. “And if they kissed while he was falling, by laws of gravity, he kissed Sungyeol. So I won.”
“No! I won!”
“No. I won!”
Sungyeol sighs and rubs his temples as the two rivals argue once again.
Myungsoo buries his face in his hands to hide the flustered blush blooming from his cheeks.
Sunggyu shakes his head and shares a look with Sungjong, muttering “Like I said, perfect for each other.”
And Dongwoo slams his now empty mug down and then proceeds to face plant into the table in a heap of snores. He was always a sleepy drunk.
-- -- -- --
“Look at them,” Woohyun sneers at the couple walking in front of them as they make their way back to the castle. He scoffs when Sungyeol pulls Myungsoo closer to his side and whispers something into the younger boy’s ear. He stares daggers at their interlocked hands. “They make me sick.”
“I can’t believe I didn’t win.” Howon mumbles more to himself than anyone. “All of that for nothing! I mean, we tied, which means I didn't lose, but I didn't win either. And I didn’t even start studying for my Care of Magical Creatures O.W.L.” He sends at sharp gaze at Woohyun. “If I get a Troll, it’s all your fault.”
“My fault?! Blame them!” The Slytherin points an accusing finger at Myungsoo and Sungyeol. “They’re the ones who took forever and an eternity to kiss! And it was an accident!”
“I guess I kind of understand them though.” Howon shrugs. “I mean, first kisses aren’t something you ‘just do.’”
“But it’s so easy,” Woohyun whines. “All you gotta do is --”
Without thinking (obviously), Woohyun grabs Howon by the face and presses their mouths together. It’s not quite a kiss, should barely be even considered a peck. But when he pulls back, the Gryffindor is staring at him, wide eyed and lips slightly parted in shock. Woohyun quickly removes his hands from Howon’s face and stuffs them in his pockets.
A very thick and very awkward silence ensues as the two fifth years stand a foot apart in the middle of the snow covered trail.
“If anyone asks, this didn’t happen. If they say they saw us, call them crazy and slap them across the face. If that doesn’t work, just put a confundus charm on them and make a break for it. We never speak of this and I still hate you,” Woohyun rushes out in one breath.
Howon blinks and nods. “Yes. Never again." They resume walking. "And I hate you more.”
stop ■
A/N: Everything in this AU is for Tina. Thank you so much for holding my hand throughout this whole thing even though I'm pretty sure you were just here for Dongwoo LO L And if you manage to have made it to this author's note, thank you so much for actually going through all of that dumb and I hope you at least chuckled a few times at my attempts at being funny. 15K and I don't really know what I feel. I love this AU way more than I probably should, it's a bit alarming. But, again, thank you so much for reading!!! ❤❤❤