folding/stuffing is boring
Title: Flavor of the Day
Fandom: The Office
Summary: Jello pranks will ensue.
Notes: Yeah, this one gets a title. Takes place in season three, and the second I feel comfortable writing Michael I'll give a "full episode" a shot.
**********
The Office - Flavor of the Day
By Mystic
December 1st 2006
**********
Dwight shifted uncomfortably in his chair as he looked from the ground up into the camera and set his lips in an annoyed frown. “The Shrute’s were never known to back down from a challenge. If they felt their territory was being attacked, they retaliated, and they won. Why? Because they were smarter. It was a genetic fact. The women that the Shrute men chose as their mates were chosen because of their cunning intelligence. You don’t breed a smart dog with a dumb dog. Why? Dumb puppies. But the Shrute’s only brought smart bitches into the family. It strengthened the pups.”
The camera caught Angela working diligently through the blinds of the conference room.
“That said,” Dwight spat with a nod of his head. “Jim is encroaching on Shrute land. Sure. This is just my office space, but it remains my space.” He sat straighter. “So I’ve devised a little piece of payback. A miniature bomb, if you will, to let him know that I’m not backing down. Oh no. I am NOT backing down.”
Jim yawned visibly as he entered the office, nodding a hello towards Pam as she lifted the phone off the receiver and uttered words he never got tired of. “Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.” He actually missed it when he left to the Stamford branch. He called her once and hung up on her and spent the day waiting for her to call back for an explanation - she never did.
“Hey Dwight,” he greeted the man who remained focused on his computer, responding with barely a movement of his eyes. Jim grinned, knowing it was a sure sign something was afoot. He sighed and greeted Andy who stared blankly into his computer, a normal morning ritual, Jim knew. It would take him fifteen minutes to charge up into the normal ball of weirdness he was used to.
Dropping his bag on the back of his chair, Jim walked back up to the front to hang his coat on the rack. His eyes drifted to Pam, who let the phone fall back onto the receiver and then she looked up, smiling as he smirked and adjusted his coat.
“Oh hey, I got something for you,” she said quietly, her chair swinging back as she reached for her purse and began rummaging.
Jim moved towards her desk, his hand balling into fists as he leaned in closer. “Beesly, tell me you have a Nintendo Wii in there…”
Her shoulders shook with a short laugh just before her head came up. “I know you’ve been on a health kick...”
“It’s not a kick,” he pointed out. “It’s more of a poke.”
Pam smiled. “I found you this.” She put a small purple box up between his hands where they were pressed into the top of the reception desk.
Jim laughed as he picked up the item. “Grape flavoring for water,” he read.
She shrugged. “For when you’re having Grape Soda withdrawals.”
He was impressed and he started to strike up a conversation, the first true one since he’d returned when Dwight barked his name. Jim frowned and turned slightly.
“I know you’ve been gone to that Other branch for a couple months, but on this side of the Island we still have work to do and are expected to do it diligently.”
Jim thrust out his bottom lip and raised his eyebrows, turning back to Pam with a shrug before walking back towards his desk. He put the box down next to his phone, touching it gently before flicking on his monitor and taking a few sheets from his inbox. Dwight smirked and Jim turned towards the camera, a perplexed expression on his face as he moved to pick up a pen to start the day.
He heard Dwight snicker and he examined his desk. Nothing seemed out of order. Jim opened his drawer and broke into a wide grin, lifting the plate with his Post-It notes inside a bright green Jello mold and he immediately exclaimed, “Oh My God Pam! Someone put my Post-It’s inside Jello!” He turned his back on Dwight and gave Pam an excited smile.
“Oh no, Jim!” She gasped back, standing. “Are you going to tell Michael? I think you should tell Michael.”
Jim shook his head, letting his shoulders drop. “Pam, that’s not going to solve anything and you know it. There’s only one thing that can be done.”
“What?” Dwight pitched in, his grin wide. “Call Jan?”
Turning back, Jim scrunched his face. “No!” He looked back at Pam, who went into her drawer and pulled up two spoons. “We have to eat it out. I mean, really, what am I going to do without my Post-It notes.”
“WHAT?!” Dwight shouted.
Pam rushed over to his desk and handed him a spoon and she watched him dig out a piece and eat it before eating her own. “He can’t work without Post-It notes,” she shrugged, moving to take another bite. “Right, Jim?”
“You’re not angry?” Dwight asked. “Someone put office materials inside a consumable product. That… why… MICHAEL!” He shouted, flustered.
The man inside the office stirred from a morning nap and looked out of the window just as Dwight opened his door. “What, Dwight?” He groaned, standing.
“I put Jim’s Post-It’s in Jello and he’s not angry.”
Michael looked towards Jim a moment, expecting to reprimand him - watching him sit there with a spoon sticking out of his mouth looking perplexed - when he turned back to Dwight. “Why would you do that?”
“He does it to me all the time!” Dwight told him back, sternly.
“You have no proof of that,” Jim pointed his spoon towards Dwight.
Dwight pressed his hands on his waist. “Michael…”
Michael let out a flustered sigh. “Jim, go get new Post-It’s from the stock shelf . Dwight…” he looked at the man standing there turning redder and redder as the seconds passed. “Grow up.” He moved back to his office. “No one interrupt me again until after the Spice girls save the world from the aliens.” He shut the door behind him and closed the shades.
Jim smiled up at Dwight, digging his spoon back into the Jello next to where Pam was moving to take another chunk. His knuckles brushed hers just before Dwight rushed towards the break room. Looking up, Jim watched Pam close her mouth around the spoon and her eyebrows rose as she smiled around it. Jim gave her a nod of appreciation and she half bowed back before going towards her desk.
“Is he always like that?” Karen asked, a folder held tight between her hands as she approached Jim’s desk.
“Um, Michael or Dwight?” Jim questioned, swiveling to look at her. He watched her remain there, no change on her face and he nodded. “Yeah, pretty much normal.”
Karen bit her bottom lip and then gestured towards the purple box on his desk. “Grape?”
Jim shrugged, his eyes drifting towards the package. “My favorite flavor.”
She leaned forward, a smirk playing on her lips. “I’m more of a lemon person.”
As she walked away, Jim turned to look up at Pam, who’d just started another conversation on the phone. He tipped his head again and mouthed a “thanks”, his finger brushing the top of the box before he moved towards the stock shelves for a new pad of Post-It notes.
Dwight frowned into the camera as Jim worked behind him just outside of the conference room. He started a sentence and then clamped his mouth shut. “I’ll just have to adjust my strategy,” he offered before standing up and leaving.
-=-=-=-=-
Finis
Fandom: The Office
Summary: Jello pranks will ensue.
Notes: Yeah, this one gets a title. Takes place in season three, and the second I feel comfortable writing Michael I'll give a "full episode" a shot.
**********
The Office - Flavor of the Day
By Mystic
December 1st 2006
**********
Dwight shifted uncomfortably in his chair as he looked from the ground up into the camera and set his lips in an annoyed frown. “The Shrute’s were never known to back down from a challenge. If they felt their territory was being attacked, they retaliated, and they won. Why? Because they were smarter. It was a genetic fact. The women that the Shrute men chose as their mates were chosen because of their cunning intelligence. You don’t breed a smart dog with a dumb dog. Why? Dumb puppies. But the Shrute’s only brought smart bitches into the family. It strengthened the pups.”
The camera caught Angela working diligently through the blinds of the conference room.
“That said,” Dwight spat with a nod of his head. “Jim is encroaching on Shrute land. Sure. This is just my office space, but it remains my space.” He sat straighter. “So I’ve devised a little piece of payback. A miniature bomb, if you will, to let him know that I’m not backing down. Oh no. I am NOT backing down.”
Jim yawned visibly as he entered the office, nodding a hello towards Pam as she lifted the phone off the receiver and uttered words he never got tired of. “Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.” He actually missed it when he left to the Stamford branch. He called her once and hung up on her and spent the day waiting for her to call back for an explanation - she never did.
“Hey Dwight,” he greeted the man who remained focused on his computer, responding with barely a movement of his eyes. Jim grinned, knowing it was a sure sign something was afoot. He sighed and greeted Andy who stared blankly into his computer, a normal morning ritual, Jim knew. It would take him fifteen minutes to charge up into the normal ball of weirdness he was used to.
Dropping his bag on the back of his chair, Jim walked back up to the front to hang his coat on the rack. His eyes drifted to Pam, who let the phone fall back onto the receiver and then she looked up, smiling as he smirked and adjusted his coat.
“Oh hey, I got something for you,” she said quietly, her chair swinging back as she reached for her purse and began rummaging.
Jim moved towards her desk, his hand balling into fists as he leaned in closer. “Beesly, tell me you have a Nintendo Wii in there…”
Her shoulders shook with a short laugh just before her head came up. “I know you’ve been on a health kick...”
“It’s not a kick,” he pointed out. “It’s more of a poke.”
Pam smiled. “I found you this.” She put a small purple box up between his hands where they were pressed into the top of the reception desk.
Jim laughed as he picked up the item. “Grape flavoring for water,” he read.
She shrugged. “For when you’re having Grape Soda withdrawals.”
He was impressed and he started to strike up a conversation, the first true one since he’d returned when Dwight barked his name. Jim frowned and turned slightly.
“I know you’ve been gone to that Other branch for a couple months, but on this side of the Island we still have work to do and are expected to do it diligently.”
Jim thrust out his bottom lip and raised his eyebrows, turning back to Pam with a shrug before walking back towards his desk. He put the box down next to his phone, touching it gently before flicking on his monitor and taking a few sheets from his inbox. Dwight smirked and Jim turned towards the camera, a perplexed expression on his face as he moved to pick up a pen to start the day.
He heard Dwight snicker and he examined his desk. Nothing seemed out of order. Jim opened his drawer and broke into a wide grin, lifting the plate with his Post-It notes inside a bright green Jello mold and he immediately exclaimed, “Oh My God Pam! Someone put my Post-It’s inside Jello!” He turned his back on Dwight and gave Pam an excited smile.
“Oh no, Jim!” She gasped back, standing. “Are you going to tell Michael? I think you should tell Michael.”
Jim shook his head, letting his shoulders drop. “Pam, that’s not going to solve anything and you know it. There’s only one thing that can be done.”
“What?” Dwight pitched in, his grin wide. “Call Jan?”
Turning back, Jim scrunched his face. “No!” He looked back at Pam, who went into her drawer and pulled up two spoons. “We have to eat it out. I mean, really, what am I going to do without my Post-It notes.”
“WHAT?!” Dwight shouted.
Pam rushed over to his desk and handed him a spoon and she watched him dig out a piece and eat it before eating her own. “He can’t work without Post-It notes,” she shrugged, moving to take another bite. “Right, Jim?”
“You’re not angry?” Dwight asked. “Someone put office materials inside a consumable product. That… why… MICHAEL!” He shouted, flustered.
The man inside the office stirred from a morning nap and looked out of the window just as Dwight opened his door. “What, Dwight?” He groaned, standing.
“I put Jim’s Post-It’s in Jello and he’s not angry.”
Michael looked towards Jim a moment, expecting to reprimand him - watching him sit there with a spoon sticking out of his mouth looking perplexed - when he turned back to Dwight. “Why would you do that?”
“He does it to me all the time!” Dwight told him back, sternly.
“You have no proof of that,” Jim pointed his spoon towards Dwight.
Dwight pressed his hands on his waist. “Michael…”
Michael let out a flustered sigh. “Jim, go get new Post-It’s from the stock shelf . Dwight…” he looked at the man standing there turning redder and redder as the seconds passed. “Grow up.” He moved back to his office. “No one interrupt me again until after the Spice girls save the world from the aliens.” He shut the door behind him and closed the shades.
Jim smiled up at Dwight, digging his spoon back into the Jello next to where Pam was moving to take another chunk. His knuckles brushed hers just before Dwight rushed towards the break room. Looking up, Jim watched Pam close her mouth around the spoon and her eyebrows rose as she smiled around it. Jim gave her a nod of appreciation and she half bowed back before going towards her desk.
“Is he always like that?” Karen asked, a folder held tight between her hands as she approached Jim’s desk.
“Um, Michael or Dwight?” Jim questioned, swiveling to look at her. He watched her remain there, no change on her face and he nodded. “Yeah, pretty much normal.”
Karen bit her bottom lip and then gestured towards the purple box on his desk. “Grape?”
Jim shrugged, his eyes drifting towards the package. “My favorite flavor.”
She leaned forward, a smirk playing on her lips. “I’m more of a lemon person.”
As she walked away, Jim turned to look up at Pam, who’d just started another conversation on the phone. He tipped his head again and mouthed a “thanks”, his finger brushing the top of the box before he moved towards the stock shelves for a new pad of Post-It notes.
Dwight frowned into the camera as Jim worked behind him just outside of the conference room. He started a sentence and then clamped his mouth shut. “I’ll just have to adjust my strategy,” he offered before standing up and leaving.
-=-=-=-=-
Finis