what is happening in my life?
ok so basically today was one of the worst school days of my life. i realized that i had to do a sketch that i was already one day late and i had to sketch it in like two seconds. then i'm walking to second period and i'm just goin to ignore luisa becuase i'm so tired of this stupid drama that is constantly surrounding my life. and as i'm walking in the door she says "you're ugly" and it just sucked b/c i was trying to be mature and just forget about all of that and she has to try and confront me again. and then brady bitched me out and it just sucks because i've completly lost him from my life and we used to be so close like best friends and i'm so mad at him now and he's completly changed. and hten next i found out that hannah had talked to jeff last night about how i still talk shit about him and how i'm just a bitter ex girlfriend and all this stuff and how she thinks i'm being retarded about htis whole situation which i guess i am id on't even know anymore i don't know how to handle my life and all the weird situations i've had to encounter. and i just broke down i was shaking and i couldn't stop crying i cried all through civics and spanish. thank god for patrick because he finnally cheered me up a little bit. and then i get to lunch and i just have to deal with it all over again. now i'm at hannah's and i just read the conversation and i just kind of feel betrayed at this point, i mean i don't know i guess i was doing the wrong thing i just wish someone that actually cared about me would have told me. like jeff telling me just made me pissed off because he has no right to tell me what to do anymore but he was right i should have taken it down becuase that's unnecessary and immature. hannah was just like me and maggie were talking about how you are being ridiculous and you should stop and i am. i just have no idea how to handle this situation, like seeing someone you loved with someone you can't stand and realizing that they both hate you and see you as the crazy bitch ex girlfriend it just sucks. i wasn't trying to be racist and i'm not but now i see that it could have been easily portrayed that way. i hate myself i don't act like that i'm not a mean girl but things like this have made me become one towards people that affect my life in negative ways. i shouldn't have put that in my profile and luisa shouldn't have confronted me in that way. she should have talked to me about the problem instead of telling me that i was ugly that is immature and putting up something that siad she would make some killer burritos was immature and i am apologizing for that now and i'll do it to her but to all you people who are freaking out about this situation even though you really shouldn't be involved in it at all i'm sorry. it's just stupid high school drama that none of us will remember in 5 years and if we do we'll just look back and fucking laugh but for now everyone please blow this out of porportion as much as possible. well thanks for such a great day friends, ex-boyfriends, and old friends that have changed into people that i don't want to be associated with. break ups fucking suck on so many levels