Forever Part II
This life is so difficult sometimes... and perhaps I make it so. I really would love to go back to being a child. Cares seemed much simpler then.
I want to be finished with men. I want to just live my life and if one comes along that sweeps me off my feet, then fine. But I don't want all this drama. Love doesn't even form triangles with me, it forms octagons!
I just want ONE GOOD man. Actually, I have no idea what I want. Which is probably why all my relationships are doomed to failure. That's why I need to be alone. But why is it so hard for me to be alone? Do I not like myself? That's not it. I don't like myself right now but overall I'm pretty happy with me. Am I needy? Maybe. But I think there is just something wrong with me. At night I want to go to sleep with someone's arms around me. I need to change this and let My teddy bear be enough for me.
I wouldn't spend the night with Chris last night and he stared pouting. This morning he had written a blog entry on how he wanted to snort coke because he was so hurt. Geez.... I gotta get out of this.
I want to be finished with men. I want to just live my life and if one comes along that sweeps me off my feet, then fine. But I don't want all this drama. Love doesn't even form triangles with me, it forms octagons!
I just want ONE GOOD man. Actually, I have no idea what I want. Which is probably why all my relationships are doomed to failure. That's why I need to be alone. But why is it so hard for me to be alone? Do I not like myself? That's not it. I don't like myself right now but overall I'm pretty happy with me. Am I needy? Maybe. But I think there is just something wrong with me. At night I want to go to sleep with someone's arms around me. I need to change this and let My teddy bear be enough for me.
I wouldn't spend the night with Chris last night and he stared pouting. This morning he had written a blog entry on how he wanted to snort coke because he was so hurt. Geez.... I gotta get out of this.