So exhausted Ate a small (280cal) meal at 5 Ate a larger (500cal) meal at 7pm with the intention of purging + a tub of ben and jerrys (this is sadly my favourite food to throw up). Puked all that up, including some of the earlier meal which i had intended to just eat but w.e C/S for another 2 or 3? hours (time disappears in chew spit land, ( Read more... )

I have not been myself for so long.
I have felt so...distanced from who i am.
My mind is loud now.
I am getting back to me.

Well that was an absolute fucking train wreck.
Ate a salmon fillet and some asparagus. C/S some tortellini ???? WHYYY.
Then went on my second hour long walk of the day before deciding i needed to buy ice cream to purge.
Hi hello im a waste of space.
Hours and hours of my day dedicated to this nonsense.
This was exactly why i didnt want to stop fasting.

I ( Read more... )

Down 6lbs in 6 days.
I did finally eat.
Just under 300 cals yesterday, it gave me enough energy to exercise properly this morning, walked for nearly 2 hours aswell.

I missed the floaty feeling, but everyrhing else is far from ideal.
My teeth and gums hurt from c/s so much, then of course im purging on top of that.
Its almost pure acid.
Im losing hours ( Read more... )

And now, i dont even have the will to move.
Drinking water seems like an effort.
Putting socks on seems like an impossible task.
I am struggling to move today but i know if i can just get up and go for a walk i feel better.
Down.
I am just down.

A very wise friend posted this and i think its a wonderful way of explaining it.

Once upon a time there was a girl who lived inside a box. Not any old box, no. This was a different and difficult kind of box. This was a box inside her mind ( Read more... )