Trip to the Coast (and more badness)
Okay, so I have a fuck ton of pictures to share with this post so am going to do that first, then the actual entry. There was a ton of pictures (like over 100 for just a few days) so I made them into sideshows real quick so I wouldn't have to do all the html code required to post them all in a list. So, you can pause it or click 'view all images' if there is one you want to see better or steal. So, go look!
(there's a limit of 50 pics for a slide show so I needed 2) This one is mostly pictures of me and my aunt Albertine.
Okay, so now to the actual update. I wrote last time that my mom was 'trying' to quit drinking again, well she actually started on Thursday. I left for the beach with my aunt and uncle on Saturday afternoon, got back Sunday night, and she had already gone and gotten her a gallon of vodka and had made her way most of the way through it. I just don't fucking know what to do, if I yell at her for it she'll just get defensive and more likely than not I will have to restrain her and stop myself from just leaving her to her own shit because this is just not my fucking responsibility. She wants to get back ASAP but dad isn't going to let her come if she isn't dry and she's not even trying which tells me that she wants to go back for dad to take care of her and even if she does stop drinking she will start right back up again the first chance she gets and start all kinds of shit for dad, again. I'm going to call dad in a little bit when he gets off work and talk about it but I don't want to go back with her into the hell that is going to be my house so I think I am going to try to talk him into letting me stay here until Christmas, not that he can do much to make me come home but I do really respect his wished and I hope he'll at least be okay with it. I need a break from refereeing. Its nice too that I have some family here to hang out with that I basically never get to see. It's been a long time since I've had a family support system and its just really nice to have them there again especially with all the shit going on with me now (and seemingly always). The shitty thing is that I had a really fucking good time at the shore, we blasted the music all weekend and danced and sang and it was just really good to relax and actually get some sleep for once. The beach was gorgeous, the weather was perfect, and I had a great time. I road up (a 2 hour trip) with Chris on his motorcycle and just the scenery of the mountains and the river, it was just gorgeous, and their beach house is really cute. I think I'm going up there with them again next weekend, hopefully sans-mom again but I don't know. Selfishly I want to ship her off back home for dad to deal with her but also I don't want to hurt dad and Alex with that drama. Really, again, I just have no idea what to do about any of this and I can only put off the thought-process for so long. Ugh.
(there's a limit of 50 pics for a slide show so I needed 2) This one is mostly pictures of me and my aunt Albertine.
Okay, so now to the actual update. I wrote last time that my mom was 'trying' to quit drinking again, well she actually started on Thursday. I left for the beach with my aunt and uncle on Saturday afternoon, got back Sunday night, and she had already gone and gotten her a gallon of vodka and had made her way most of the way through it. I just don't fucking know what to do, if I yell at her for it she'll just get defensive and more likely than not I will have to restrain her and stop myself from just leaving her to her own shit because this is just not my fucking responsibility. She wants to get back ASAP but dad isn't going to let her come if she isn't dry and she's not even trying which tells me that she wants to go back for dad to take care of her and even if she does stop drinking she will start right back up again the first chance she gets and start all kinds of shit for dad, again. I'm going to call dad in a little bit when he gets off work and talk about it but I don't want to go back with her into the hell that is going to be my house so I think I am going to try to talk him into letting me stay here until Christmas, not that he can do much to make me come home but I do really respect his wished and I hope he'll at least be okay with it. I need a break from refereeing. Its nice too that I have some family here to hang out with that I basically never get to see. It's been a long time since I've had a family support system and its just really nice to have them there again especially with all the shit going on with me now (and seemingly always). The shitty thing is that I had a really fucking good time at the shore, we blasted the music all weekend and danced and sang and it was just really good to relax and actually get some sleep for once. The beach was gorgeous, the weather was perfect, and I had a great time. I road up (a 2 hour trip) with Chris on his motorcycle and just the scenery of the mountains and the river, it was just gorgeous, and their beach house is really cute. I think I'm going up there with them again next weekend, hopefully sans-mom again but I don't know. Selfishly I want to ship her off back home for dad to deal with her but also I don't want to hurt dad and Alex with that drama. Really, again, I just have no idea what to do about any of this and I can only put off the thought-process for so long. Ugh.