...atterns engraved not so easily erased, still wandering trying to find your place...

[my_pet_rock]

So, I wrote a version of this a couple years ago. I thought I'd try to revise it. This is what I've come up with, I'll find the link to the old entry if you want to read this first version

Comments

[chasingfireflys]

I know I don't comment much, but I do read what you write most of the time and I wanted to say something on this one.

Sure, it's worthy of an essay contest, and it's beautifully written, but that's not really what I wanted to say. I felt so sad. You convey emotion so well. I'm sorry, and I know that makes no difference in anything you feel, but I really, really am. Stunningly gorgeous and sad all at once.

Anyway, I hope you're doing well! :) Miss seeing you at camp in the old days

♥Amanda

[meliss2612]

I have to tell you I think this is wonderful.

You really conveyed emotion without over-doing it (if that makes any sense.) I would submit it for an essay contest, it's really a great piece. The only thing I would do is maybe use a title in which the reader would be able to infer what was happening? I don't know, jsut a suggestion. Great work though.