Original: Black Stilettos
Title: Black Stilettos
Author: Erin (erinm_4600)
Characters, Pairing: Audrey, Billy, Tyler
Rating: PG
Summary: Sometimes, uncomfortable undercover work is a necessity...
Warning: *Written for the Weekend challenge at 1-million-words. Prompt
Disclaimer: For the first time, I can say that EVERYTHING about this one is MINE, ALL MINE. Mwahaha!! Inspiration comes from tvrealm and the Create a Show challenge, with thanks.
Audrey Porter hated undercover work. Not just hated, in fact... loathed. With a capital L.
Especially when it required uncomfortable shoes.
This time around, it wasn't just the shoes Audrey didn't like. She hated the skin-tight dress. She hated the push-up bra - even though there wasn't exactly a lot there to be pushed up. She hated the skimpy black underwear. She hated the layers of makeup. Mostly, though, she hated the hair.
Now, in this case, it was partially her own fault, because she grabbed the box at the nearby drugstore. But, after fighting with the wig for the better part of an hour - and losing it twice - she had finally given up and decided to just dye it.
Two boxes of Herbal Essences Black Stilettos and 45 minutes later, Deputy US Marshall Porter came back into the squad room in a skin-tight, silver sequin dress, black 'hooker heels', and a shade of permanent jet-black hair that was still damp from the best-she-could-manage-in-the-bathroom-sink rinse that she wouldn't have even picked on a dare.
And she still hadn't even gone into the small bag of brand-new makeup sitting on her desk.
Ignoring the stares from the two men on her team, Audrey slammed her desk drawer a few times, frustration starting to show as she couldn't find the necklace they'd taken out of evidence. She hated the idea of taking off her mother's necklace, but this was one of those times where she would force herself through it.
Besides, she'd much rather lose someone else's necklace in a firefight than her mother's jewelry.
Tossing her head one way, in order to get the still-damp hair out of her face, Audrey moved over to the file cabinet along the back wall and started yanking drawers open. Cursing under her breath, Audrey reached back, trying to pull at the tight skirt, as if it would stop the discomfort of having a thin piece of string wedged up her butt.
Marshall Bill Hammond was half a step away from drooling as he stared at her, mentally slapping himself for ever thinking that she wasn't his type. Of course, as she was a natural blonde, it would make sense that she didn't ping his radar. "I will shoot you," she warned in a stern voice, not even turning around to glare at her teammate, "in the head."
Hammond blinked slightly and looked away, knowing exactly which head she was referring to.
Finally finding the necklace, Audrey moved back to her desk and reached up to remove the chain and small pendant she wore every day. As she opened the plastic bag holding the evidence necklace, Marshall Tyler McCain - barely even a day over twenty-four years - asked: "Where's your gun?" He glanced at Hammond and made a face as the older man was clearly ignoring Audrey’s warning and ogling her formerly-unnoticed curves.
Audrey had closed the clasp of the gaudy necklace, and was pulling the lid off the bright red lipstick as she glanced at Tyler and replied: "You really don't want to know."
Author: Erin (erinm_4600)
Characters, Pairing: Audrey, Billy, Tyler
Rating: PG
Summary: Sometimes, uncomfortable undercover work is a necessity...
Warning: *Written for the Weekend challenge at 1-million-words. Prompt
Disclaimer: For the first time, I can say that EVERYTHING about this one is MINE, ALL MINE. Mwahaha!! Inspiration comes from tvrealm and the Create a Show challenge, with thanks.
Audrey Porter hated undercover work. Not just hated, in fact... loathed. With a capital L.
Especially when it required uncomfortable shoes.
This time around, it wasn't just the shoes Audrey didn't like. She hated the skin-tight dress. She hated the push-up bra - even though there wasn't exactly a lot there to be pushed up. She hated the skimpy black underwear. She hated the layers of makeup. Mostly, though, she hated the hair.
Now, in this case, it was partially her own fault, because she grabbed the box at the nearby drugstore. But, after fighting with the wig for the better part of an hour - and losing it twice - she had finally given up and decided to just dye it.
Two boxes of Herbal Essences Black Stilettos and 45 minutes later, Deputy US Marshall Porter came back into the squad room in a skin-tight, silver sequin dress, black 'hooker heels', and a shade of permanent jet-black hair that was still damp from the best-she-could-manage-in-the-bathroom-sink rinse that she wouldn't have even picked on a dare.
And she still hadn't even gone into the small bag of brand-new makeup sitting on her desk.
Ignoring the stares from the two men on her team, Audrey slammed her desk drawer a few times, frustration starting to show as she couldn't find the necklace they'd taken out of evidence. She hated the idea of taking off her mother's necklace, but this was one of those times where she would force herself through it.
Besides, she'd much rather lose someone else's necklace in a firefight than her mother's jewelry.
Tossing her head one way, in order to get the still-damp hair out of her face, Audrey moved over to the file cabinet along the back wall and started yanking drawers open. Cursing under her breath, Audrey reached back, trying to pull at the tight skirt, as if it would stop the discomfort of having a thin piece of string wedged up her butt.
Marshall Bill Hammond was half a step away from drooling as he stared at her, mentally slapping himself for ever thinking that she wasn't his type. Of course, as she was a natural blonde, it would make sense that she didn't ping his radar. "I will shoot you," she warned in a stern voice, not even turning around to glare at her teammate, "in the head."
Hammond blinked slightly and looked away, knowing exactly which head she was referring to.
Finally finding the necklace, Audrey moved back to her desk and reached up to remove the chain and small pendant she wore every day. As she opened the plastic bag holding the evidence necklace, Marshall Tyler McCain - barely even a day over twenty-four years - asked: "Where's your gun?" He glanced at Hammond and made a face as the older man was clearly ignoring Audrey’s warning and ogling her formerly-unnoticed curves.
Audrey had closed the clasp of the gaudy necklace, and was pulling the lid off the bright red lipstick as she glanced at Tyler and replied: "You really don't want to know."